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Some from school days

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Here is some real first grade humor. Only problem is,

some of us are past the first grade....... -=Ava

 

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If an elephant didn't have a trunk, how would he smell?

Trunk, or no trunk, he'd still smell terrible.

 

How do you kill a blue elephant?

With a blue shotgun.

 

How do you kill a pink elephant?

Twist his trunk until it turns blue and then kill him with a blue shotgun.

 

Why do ducks have webbed feet?

To stamp out forest fires.

 

Why do elephants have flat feet?

To stamp out burning ducks.

 

Why do elephants wear green sneakers?

To hide in the grass.

 

Why does an elephant lie on his back?

To trip low-flying canaries.

 

How do you make an elephant float?

Two scoops of ice cream, soda and some elephant.

 

Why did the ant bend down?

To trip an unsuspecting elephant.

 

How did the elephant climb the coconut tree?

He sat on a coconut and waited for it to grow.

 

How did the elephant climb down the coconut tree?

He sat on the coconut leaf and waited for autumn.

 

How do you know that the elephant is coming here to stay?

Because he seems to be bringing his trunk along.

 

How do you know that the elephant is riding a bicycle?

By looking at it.

 

How do you know that the elephant is inside a refrigerator?

When you see the bicycle parked outside.

 

What did Tarzan say when he saw a dead ant?

He beat his chest and shouted, "dead antdead antdead antdead ant".

 

What did Tarzan say when he saw a live ant?

He picked it up, placed it on his palm, killed it, put it down and shouted,

"dead antdead antdead antdead ant".

 

How do you know that the snake is drunk?

It crawls in a straight line.

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