Child Abuse (For X Com USers)

[Guest guest]

Haribol Prabhu

 

Please accept my humble obeisances

All glories to Srila Prabhupada

 

Anuttama Prabhu asked if we can put this message on X All Com

users). It is regarding the child abuse case.

 

Your servant

Bhakta Lyall

 

 

WE MUST ALL TAKE UP THE HEALING PROCESS

 

By Anuttama Dasa

 

Dear Fellow Vaishnavas, Members of ISKCON, and Friends,

 

Please accept my humble obeisances. All glories to Srila

Prabhupada.

 

I would like to share some thoughts regarding our community's

response to the Turley lawsuit. As a parent, a board member of

Children of Krishna, a supporter of the Child Protection Office,

and the principle spokesperson for ISKCON on this issue, I have

been personally pulled from all sides by this case, and I find it

the most emotionally draining and spiritually challenging issue I

have faced in 25 years as a Krishna devotee.

 

Certainly the outcome of the case is in the hands of the Supreme

Personality of Godhead. Yet, as His devotees, it is our duty to

try to apply Krishna conscious principles to every event of our

lives and to try to act as responsible God conscious people. I am

distraught by the past suffering of our children and families.

But, I am also distraught by much of our individual and

collective responses to the lawsuit, which I find lacking in

content and understanding.

 

None of us can predict what will be the outcome of the Turley

case. But, there is one thing we do know: Many of our children

are in pain, our Hare Krishna communities are suffering, and we

are in need of healing. Whatever happens our devotees are in

crises. First and foremost, we need to heal our communities.

Whatever happens with the court case, there will still be

devotees of Krishna. Many of those devotees are now in need of

our support and love.

 

The sastras tells us that service to the devotees is the most

important form of seva. As devotees we need each other, and we

need our communities. Without healthy communities, we cannot

become Krishna conscious, nor can we be happy, or attain the goal

of life.

 

"THEY" WON'T DO IT, BUT "I" CAN

 

I am saddened by the nature of most discussions I have overheard

regarding the Turley case. While few of us will have any impact

whatsoever on the outcome of the case, we all have a tremendous

individual moral responsibility for the well being of our

devotees.

 

Too many of us, I fear, are absorbed in thoughts about what THEY

should do, what THEY should have done. I have heard youth point

the finger at adults, adults point the finger at local

authorities, local authorities point to the temple president,

presidents point to gurus, gurus pointing to GBC, GBC pointing to

parents, etc, etc., etc.

 

But what about me? What can I do to help? What can I do to heal?

What can I do to reach out to our youth and help them? What can I

do to help families and communities that are in pain? These are

the essential questions, and I humbly beg every devotee to

address this question first and foremost. I believe that this is

what Krishna wants to see. He is watching to see how each and

every one of us responds to the suffering of the Vaishnavas. If

we respond with personal sacrifice, compassion, and integrity, He

will protect and heal us all.

 

We can only control one person. And that one person, myself, can

be a source of great progress and healing, if I try. And we must

try.

 

The need to heal our communities and reach out to our youth and

families needs to be the priority of every devotee. Not just the

GBC, not just the temple authorities, not just the "older

devotees," but each of us. If we are a GBC, an "authority," or an

"older devotee" then we must certainly make this our priority.

But, not being those positions is no excuse for lethargy.

Whatever our status, we must stop thinking and complaining about

what others should do and do something ourselves-now.

 

Margaret Mead, the well known anthropologist said, "Never think

that a small group of committed people can not change the world,

indeed, it is all that ever has."

 

WHAT CAN I DO?

 

You can do plenty. There are families touched by the pain of the

case and past abuse in perhaps almost every Krishna community.

Many devotees were abused before they became devotees and the

attention of the case is reopening their wounds, as well. Abuse

is an epidemic in modern society and we have been victimized by

it. We must acknowledge that and respond.

 

Here's some ideas of what many devotees are doing in their local

communities.

 

1) Reach out to a youth in your community. If you don't know

a gurukula alumni, you should. Let the youth in your community

know you appreciate them. We all need more love and support.

2) Organize a youth center. Provide more facilities for kids

and families to get together with Krishna at the center. (In

Alachua, with the help of Children of Krishna, this is already

happening. With a little effort you can do the same.)

3) Help to organize special istagostis in your temple to

talk about what can be done locally to heal your community and

deal with the issues of past abuse. "Think globally, act

locally."

4) Join your local Child Protection Team. Help assure that

no child ever again suffers in our Hare Krishna society.

5) Give a donation to Children of Krishna (CKI) and/or the

Office of Child Protection (OCP). Many youth need help with

counseling, education, and training. Many don't want to join the

suit but they still have important financial needs. Help fill

those needs. Make a difference.

6) Don't just give a donation. Give a BIG donation. Srila

Prabhupada said grihastras should donate 50%. If you can't give

50% you can give at least 10% of your income to CKI or OCP. Do it

now. Please, these projects are in great need of your support.

7) Get involved in your local day school. Volunteer your

talent, offer to serve on the board of directors, or help paint

the school. Many gurukula alumni want to see Vaishnava education

manifested in a way they can be proud of for their own children.

Make it a reality in your community.

8) If you are a counselor or therapist, donate your time to

meet with families and youth in need in your area.

9) If you're not a counselor, or therapist, help to bring

one into your community to offer their services where there might

be a need.

10) Help to organize and facilitate a youth group in your

temple. Kids have important and diverse needs, help assure your

community is prioritizing them.

11) Preach. Talk about the need to reach out and build strong

families, to protect our children, provide them excellent Krishna

conscious education, to help the youth who may have suffered in

the past.

12) Hire a gurukula alumni. Help a youth get a start in

balancing their secular and spiritual needs.

13) Encourage your local community to make rebuilding of our

community relationships and the trust of our first generation of

children the number one priority.

14) Organize a fund raising concert or program at you local

temple and donate the funds to your local youth group and/or

Children of Krishna.

This is just a partial list. Make your own and do something.

Don't wait for others to act. Take the pro-active lead for Srila

Prabhupada.

 

REACH OUT

 

Recently, I attended the Gurukula Reunion in New Vrindavana. I

had the opportunity to hear from many gurukula alumni as well as

adults of my generation. Several things struck me.

Many gurukula alumni can't comprehend or believe that members of

my generation were unaware of the suffering that many underwent

while in gurukula. Many feel we are not doing everything within

our power to cure the wounds of the past.

 

Many older devotees do not understand the depth of the pain of

some of our youth. Despite ISKCON's anti-abuse policies, despite

official presentations about abuse in North America and India,

despite the 1998 Burke Rochford ISKCON Communications Journal

article and the subsequent international media attention, despite

Children of Krishna, Child Protection Office, and the Child

Protection Teams, etc., many still seem not cognizant of the

importance of this social problem.

 

This huge gap in generational perceptions must be closed. We need

to talk more about what can be done within our families and

within our communities. Few of us will have any impact on the

outcome of the lawsuit. But, each one of us can have a

significant impact on healing the wounds and pains of our

devotees.

 

Personally, I continue to lobby for more funding for the Child

Protection Office and for restructuring of the GBC to regain the

faith of the devotee community. As a member of the Washington,

D.C. temple, I'm helping to upgrade of our local Sunday school to

benefit today's children. As a volunteer, I'm offering my time to

help Children of Krishna. And, as a grihastra my family is trying

to donate all that we possibly can to support the Child

Protection Office and Children of Krishna.

 

Please join in this effort to help our youth, to heal our

families and strengthen our communities.

You can make a difference. Your personal commitment, more than

anything else, will demonstrate to our first generation of

children that we love them, and that Srila Prabhupada's ISKCON is

worthy of their participation.

 

Your servant,

 

Anuttama dasa