Sad but true..

[Guest guest]

Hare Krishna

 

>From Laugh-a-Lot:

 

Workplace Definition: Strategic Planning

The gathering of middle and upper management designed to

advise middle management that while they may participate,

don't expect the predetermined decisions to change.

 

 

 

~~~ Job Posting Truths Revealed! ~~~

 

 

COMPETITIVE SALARY:

We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.

 

SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED:

Some time each night and some time each weekend

 

SALES POSITION REQUIRING MOTIVATED SELF-STARTER:

We're not going to supply you with leads; there's no base

salary; you'll wait 30 days for your first commission check.

 

SELF-MOTIVATED:

Management won't answer questions.

 

CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE:

We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up; well,

a couple of the real daring guys wear earrings.

 

COMPETITIVE ENVIRONMENT:

We have a lot of turnover.

 

SOME PUBLIC RELATIONS REQUIRED:

If we're in trouble, you'll go on TV and get us out of it.

 

DUTIES WILL VARY:

Anyone in the office can boss you around.

 

CAREER-MINDED:

We expect that you will want to flip hamburgers until

you are 70.

 

SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE:

You'll need it to replace three people who just left.

 

PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST:

You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.

 

GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS:

Management communicates, you listen, figure out what

they want you to do.

 

ABILITY TO HANDLE A HEAVY WORKLOAD:

You whine and you're fired.

 

FLEXIBLE HOURS:

Work 55 hours; get paid for 40

 

Hare Krishna --

 

ys, Balarama Dasa