Words of Wisdumb -- from the Oracle...

[Guest guest]

Hare Krishna.

 

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(o o) ORACLE SERVICE HUMOR MAILING LIST

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I am in shape.

Round is a shape.

 

Brain cells come and brain cells go,

but fat cells live forever.

 

Time may be a great healer,

but it's also a lousy beautician.

 

Never be afraid to try something new.

Remember, amateurs built the ark.

Professionals built the Titanic.

 

Conscience is what hurts when everything else feels so good.

 

Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.

 

Stupidity got us into this mess ...

why can't it get us out?

 

Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit

there.

 

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common.

They should both be changed regularly...and for the same reason.

 

I don't mind going nowhere as long as it's an interesting path.

 

Anything free is worth what you pay for it.

 

Indecision is the key to flexibility.

 

It hurts to be on the cutting edge.

 

If it ain't broke, fix it till it is.

 

In just two days, tomorrow will be yesterday.

 

I always wanted to be a procrastinator, never got around to it.

 

I am a nutritional overachiever.

 

My inferiority complex is not as good as yours.

 

I am having an out-of-money experience.

 

I plan on living forever.

So far, so good.

 

I'm not afraid of heights,

just afraid of widths.

 

Practice safe eating,

always use condiments.

 

I have kleptomania,

but when it gets bad I take something for it.

 

If marriage were outlawed,

only outlaws would have in-laws.

 

I am not a perfectionist.

My parents were, though.

 

You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair

that you once got from a roller coaster.

 

An optimist thinks that this is the best possible world.

A pessimist fears that this is true.

 

People will accept your ideas much more readily if you tell them

that Benjamin Franklin said it first.

 

The real art of conversation

is not only to say the right thing at the right time,

but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.

 

Age doesn't always bring wisdom.

Sometimes age comes alone.

 

 

Hare Krishna --

 

your servant, Balarama Dasa