Prabhupada Memories

[Guest guest]

Memories of Srila Prabhupada recalled by H.H Trivikrama Swami.

 

June '00 , Galway, Ireland.

 

 

...we read at the end of that prayer to the six goswamis, how the goswamis were

always feeling separation from Krsna and they were saying, -Is Krsna just under

Govardan hill?.. Is he in Vamsi Vat?. They weren't thinking, -I have Krsna,

he's in my pocket, no they were always feeling separation. That's the mood of

the devotees of Lord Caitanya, and in that separation we can actually

experience more intense feelings. Sometimes when we remember Srila Prabhupada

by talking about him, we feel closer to him than even when we were present with

him...

 

Prabhupada was speaking in London in 1969. It was the first time he did a

public program, so many hundreds of people were there and Prabhupada had to be

so powerful because so many people were interrupting. Prabhupada said to one

man, -Sit down, you're a nonsense. So the next day I was giving Srila

Prabhupada massage. He was going to give the next lecture that day, it was like

a series of lectures. So I was thinking that I was getting him in shape for

another knockout performance for the public, so I was massaging, and massaging,

like a trainer massages a prize fighter. Generally Prabhupada would sit and

rest for massage. I would massage his arms, his legs and feet and I was talking

and talking and it was kind of like, me and you Prabhupada we'll take over the

whole world, I didn't exactly say those words but that was my mood. Suddenly

Prabhupada shouted "No" . My hands froze on his body. Then Prabhupada said

with another voice, like the voice of a child. He said in a very mild voice, -

I am just a humble servant. So I got so much realisation from that. I realised

that Prabhupada didn't want to be flattered. He really did think of himself as

the humble servant although we thought of him as the greatest personality in

the world. I really did, I thought that he was the greatest person in the

world. But he thought of himself as the humble servant. Because he was thinking

of his spiritual master and he was thinking of Krsna and of his relationship

with his spiritual master and Krsna, he was the humble servant. But by being

the humble servant he has become very prominent in the world. Wherever he went

people bowed down to him and offered garlands. He didn't think himself anything

special but for preaching sometimes he had to take the position

Just like one time I remember some people were challenging him at the airport.

One reporter said , -How come you are sitting on a big seat and are getting

flower garlands? Why are people bowing down to you? He was openly envious of

Prabhupada and Prabhupada understood immediately what his line was and he

replied, - Yes the difference between you and me sir, is that in a room full of

naked women I wouldn't be disturbed.. The other reporters who were there

laughed because they knew that this reporter who asked the question would be

disturbed. So Prabhupada was qualified, he was sober, he wasn't disturbed by

some sense gratification which otherwise every other man is attracted to and

every woman is attracted to, carried away by the senses. But Prabhupada was

very sober, very controlled because he thought of himself as the servant and

even when he was in the position of the teacher it was done out of concern. He

wasn't coming to the western world on his own account, he came on the order of

his spiritual master. He was happy to remain in Vrndavan. He was feeling the

presence of Krsna in Vrndavan. He came out of duty. Because he was taking that

order he had to take the position of master. The teacher may have to take a

superior position but he confessed to us when he first came to America, before

he had any disciples, he was kind of wandering. He said he was very happy at

that time. Having disciples, that was a headache for him, he had to manage. He

said that this management gives me a headache. He had to resign from it. So

Prabhupada was taking that trouble, that headache, because he felt obliged

because that was the order of his spiritual master and he wanted to benefit the

people in general. So he had to take the position of a master sometimes

Just like when we first got initiated, he would say Ok Bow Down, repeat after

me Nama Om ...He even had to say his own name, Bhaktivedanta. So you would

think, an ordinary person would think- What kind of trip is this guy on?

getting people to bow down and recite his name. But Prabhupada was training us.

This is the etiquette. This is how you pray to the spiritual master, but it

wasn't because he was needing that, that he was on some kind of power trip,

that he got some kick out of some people bowing down to him. He knew that this

is what they have to do in order to learn how to please Krsna.

 

Sometimes just a little thing and Prabhupada would be pleased and then we felt

satisfied. It used to be that we were always trying to satisfy ourselves but we

found that by satisfying him it was more pleasing than trying to satisfy

ourselves. If we did something and we saw that Prabhupada was really pleased

then it gave us such a feeling of satisfaction within our hearts, better than

anything we might do for ourselves, and so we were all so eager to please

Prabhupada. There was some competition amongst the disciples, Who can make

Prabhupada smile?, who could do something that he could appreciate? and then

when that happened, like I remember once in Bombay I was singing Guru puja.

After Guru puja Prabhupada, in front of everybody he said, - You are singing

very nicely, and I felt so good. He said , - I can see you have affection for

your spiritual master. So I felt so happy. It would be just a little thing but

it would be better than anything we had experienced before because it wasn't

coming from an ordinary person, like your wife or husband, you'd understand,

it's nice they appreciate but they may have some motive, you scratch my back, I

scratch yours. With Prabhupada it wasn't like that at all because you knew that

he didn't need you, he didn't require your service, he had thousands of

disciples.

I remember one time in Japan I wanted to travel with him. I said -Prabhupada

You need more than 2 servants, because 2 servants were already travelling with

him and Prabhupada just raised his head and said, - I have many servants. He

had so many servants, what did he need me for? But out of love he would

reciprocate and when he did this in a loving way we felt so satisfied....