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Text COM:2672674 (182 lines)

Mukhya (dd) (SysOp) (Lund - S)

03-Oct-99 11:10 +0200

X (All COM users) [85]

From Bhakti Caru Maharaja

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Dear Raktambara Prabhu,

 

Please accept my best wishes. All glories to Srila Prabhupada.

 

I was asked to write a response to the poison allegation by Nityananda dasa.

I tried to send it to X com users, however when I logged on it did not go

through. Most probabely there is a lock or some restriction. I am sending

the file to you. Can you please do the needful?

 

Yours in the service of Srila Prabhupada,

 

Bhakti Caru Swami.

 

----------------------- LETTER FOR X-ALL COM USERS ---------------------

SUBJECT : LET THE TRUTH PREVAIL

 

Recently one of our god-brothers, Nityananda dasa adhikari, wrote a book

called, "Someone has Poisoned Me" and alleged that the cause of Srila

Prabhupada's disappearance from this planet is arsenic poisoning, and the

ones who were serving His Divine Grace at that time administered him that

poison.

 

Since I was one of Srila Prabhupada's personal servants at that time, taking

care of his food and medicines, according to that book, I am naturally a

suspect. When I first heard about this allegation I considered it to be so

absurd that I did not think it deserved any response. I could not even

imagine that anyone with a rational mind would give any credence to such an

allegation. However, yesterday I received a com message from Hari Sauri

prabhu, one of Srila Prabhupada's personal servants and the author of "The

Transcendental Diary", saying, " The (poison) issue must be dealt with

directly. That must include direct statements from yourself (Tamal Krsna

Goswami), Bhakti Caru, Bhavananda, Jayapataka et. al. When the persons that

were there present their experiences collectively it makes a very powerful

statement. I want to repeat, it MUST be done."

 

Therefore, I felt somewhat compelled to write this statement.

 

Just in case you do not know me and wondering why Hari Sauri Prabhu is

asking me to address this issue, I will give a brief introduction about

myself - I am one of the last disciples of Srila Prabhupada. I met His

Divine Grace in January of 1977. In March, during the Gaura-Purnima

Festival, in Mayapur, he gave me first and second initiations. He personally

appointed me as his secretary for Indian affairs. Once he instructed me not

to get involved with any woman and offer this life completely to Krsna, and

soon after that, in May, he gave me sannyas in Sridham Vrindavan. I had the

good fortune to serve His Divine Grace's transcendental body until his

disappearance pastime from this planet.

 

>From Srila Prabhupada we learnt that a vaisnava does not defend himself.

Therefore, in this response to Nityananda dasa's allegation I will not try

to defend myself, however I feel it is my solemn duty to defend those who

are innocent, with my honest testimony.

 

The author of the book is accusing Tamal Krishna Goswami as the main

suspect. I do not know how well Nityananda dasa knows Tamal Krsna Maharaj

and how closely he associated with him, but while serving Srila Prabhupada I

had the opportunity to associate with him very closely and lived with him in

the same room for about seven months. During those days I saw what a deep

love and respect he had for Srila Prabhupada, and I also saw what a deep

confidence His Divine Grace had in him.

 

Tamal Krsna Maharaj has a very heavy side but one should not judge him only

from that point of view. He has a very soft side as well. Anyone who knows

him knows well how aggressive and demanding he can be and to live with him

for seven months was not always easy for me, to say the least. Yet I will

honestly admit that I have seen his other side also and I have many sweet

memories of my days with him. I have received elder brotherly affection and

care from him that created a deep bond between us. Although from time to

time we experienced our differences yet our relationship remained intact. I

decided to mention about this perception of mine because I have seen many a

times some devotees carry an inaccurate image of other devotees that obscure

their perception.

 

It is quite interesting to note that although Nityananda dasa wrote one

whole book based on some whispers and an incorrect and dubious analysis of

some hairs, was nowhere near Srila Prabhupada in those days in Vrindavan. If

he was then he would have seen how absurd his suspicion and accusition is.

 

If he was present then he would have seen, what to speak of poisoning Srila

Prabhupada, the devotees around Srila Prabhupada were praying to Krsna to

let Srila Prabhupada stay on this planet in exchange of their lives.

 

It is extremely unfortunate that Nityananda dasa is so obsessed with some

whispers, but he is not listening to the exchanges that are so loud and

clear. If he was present there then he would have seen that just a couple of

days before Srila Prabhupada left this planet he wa told his very intimate

god-brother, Srila Krsnadasa Babaji Maharaj, with tears rolling down from

his eyes, "See, how much they love me!"

 

If he was attending Srila Prabhupada in the early hours in Vrindavan, he

would have heard Srila Prabhupada as soon as his Divine Grace woke up,

"Where is Tamal? Ask him to come to me." And then he would have seen a very

sweet loving exchange between them. Srila Prabhupada talking to him about

the affairs of the movement, his various concerns about the future of this

movement and what should be done to protect this movement.

 

If Nityananda dasa was present there then he would have also seen that

there were hundreds of devotees whose hearts were so full with their love

for Srila Prabhupada that they were prepared to do anything for him. There

were personalities like Gurukripa, who used to attend Srila Prabhupda

everyday from 12 midnight to 2 in the morning. If Srila Prabhupada really

suspected that someone had poisoned him, then all he had to do is just tell

Gurukripa. Anyone who knows Gurukripa knows what would have happened then.

And it is not only Gurukripa, Srila Prabhupada had to just tell any one of

the few hundred devotees that were there, and one can only imagine what the

reaction would have been like.

 

Those who are suspecting that Srila Prabhupada has been poisoned by some of

his disciples, I will request them to go deep within their hearts and ask

whether it is at all possible for a vaisnava, who does not even kill an ant,

to murder his spiritual master.

 

One evening I was with Tamal Krishna Maharaj in our room in Vrindavan. A

mosquito was sucking his blood sitting on his leg. It had become quite

bloated with the blood that it sucked from his body. A sudden pain from the

bite made Tamal Krishna Maharaj aware of that mosquito. His hand rose in a

natural reflex to strike that little creature, but stopped all of a sudden,

then it came down slowly and flicked the mosquito away from his leg. The

person who would not even kill the mosquito that was sucking his blood, how

can anyone think that he gave poison to his spiritual master.

 

Srila Prabhupada went to Vrindavan in May from Hrisikesa to leave his body.

Everyone present there was aware of that. The conspiracy to eliminate him

was not the reality rather the reality was intense prayer to Krsna not to

let Srila Prabhupada go away from their midst.

 

I personally learnt a wonderful lesson from this allegation. I must have

developed some pride due to my good fortune in serving Srila Prabhupada

those days. Now Krsna, the destroyer of pride, is mercifully taking care of

that.

 

While I, due to my false ego, was feeling proud that I served Krsna's pure

devotee, the world is seeing me as the one who gave him poison. It is indeed

Krsna's causeless mercy.

 

I used to feel very impressed by one statement of Srila Prabodhananda

Saraswati, a very intimate associate of Sri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu and the

uncle of Srila Gopal Bhatta Goswami, "If the whole world glorifies me but

Krsna does not recognize me then what is the use of that glorification. If

the whole world spits at me but Krsna recognises me then who cares about

that spitting."

 

Very mercifully Krsna is giving me the opportunity to apply this wonderful

instruction in my own life. This allegation is making me aware about the

futility of mundane adoration and importance of Krsna's recognition. No

matter what the world thinks, Krsna knows everything. Therefore what is the

use of worrying about my image in this world? After all, sitting in my heart

Krsna knows about all that I think and do. The conditioned souls of this

material world may make mistakes in their judgement, but Krsna will never

make any mistake. I have taken shelter of Him and surrendered myself unto

Him, now let Him decide what I deserve.

 

To this world I will declare clear and loudly, "IT IS AN ABSOLUTELY ABSURD

ALLEGATION THAT SRILA PRABHUPADA HAS BEEN POISONED BY HIS DISCIPLES. IF

ANYONE INTENTIONALLY POISONED SRILA PRABHUPADA, THEN IT MUST BE ME BECAUSE

THOSE DAYS I WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO USED TO GIVE PRASAD AND MEDICINE TO HIS

DIVINE GRACE. WHATEVER HE ATE AND DRANK WENT THROUGH MY HAND."

 

Let the omniscient, omnipotent Supreme Personality of Godhead judge me. If I

committed such a heinous crime towards the most dear devotee of the Lord, to

whom I owe everything, including my very existence, then let me suffer

eternally in the darkest region of the hell.

 

If any of Srila Prabhupada's disciples, whose heart is steeped with his love

for Srila Prabhupada, wants to take the law in his hand and judge me, I will

welcome that also. I give him full freedom to judge and do whatever he wants

to do with me. I can assure him that I will accept that judgement without

any protest.

 

If someone wants to take me to the mundane court also, he can do so. There

also I will give the same testimony, "IT IS AN ABSOLUTELY ABSURD ALLEGATION

THAT SRILA PRABHUPADA HAS BEEN POISONED BY HIS DISCIPLES. IF ANYONE

INTENTIONALLY POISONED SRILA PRABHUPADA, THEN IT MUST BE ME BECAUSE THOSE

DAYS I WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO USED TO GIVE PRASAD AND MEDICINE TO HIS DIVINE

GRACE. WHATEVER HE ATE AND DRANK WENT THROUGH MY HAND."

 

Waiting to receive your judgement and aspiring to remain a servant of the

vaisnavas,

 

Bhakti Caru Swami.

 

P.S. If you have any question, please feel free to write to me.

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