Guest guest Posted August 17, 2004 Report Share Posted August 17, 2004 Dear Devotees, Please accept my humble obeisancess, I am disciple of His Holiness Bhakti Tirtha Swami and I would like to inform you about his health condition. So I sending you speach that he gave to his disciples few days ago and letter from Bhakti Caru Swami. your servant, Gaura-Sankirtana das Darshan with Bhakti Tirtha Maharaja - August 14 2003 at Institute Washington DC HH BHAKTI TIRTHA SWAMI: I was trying to find something to read to make this whole thing as simple for me to express, but somehow Krishna did not let me find it so I will just say a few short things. I am trying to control my emotions so I can get the message across. My heart is opened up so my emotions are overwhelmed. So let me just tune everybody in to what I think is happening. First if you look at my Vyasa Puja last year, if you look at the one that comes out this year, everything is self-explanatory. You also look at the prefice from my Spiritual Warrior 4 & 5. The essence of what is discussed in there, especially this year which I was trying to read, but I want you to read it, is that in this last Vyasa Puja offering I made a prayer to Prabhupada that I am 54 years and that I felt that I have done whatever material things I have experienced, I have experienced, spiritually I have experienced everything, except the highest level of purity. In the offering I mentioned that, similar to last year. So many people in the secular world are suffering and so many in the devotee community are suffering. In the devotee community so many divorces, most of our children are not accepting our philosophy, many people are loosing faith and many people are not understanding how deep Krishna C. is, because the level of commitment are superficial. So basically I said I don't want to be apart of this. Basically I said to my spiritual master that the only way to make a serious difference, Especially the leadership, I going to have to reach a higher level of purity. And I offered myself as I explained yesterday to Prabhupada.." I am ready to experience what ever can allow a quantity number of people to be relieved of their suffering. So I asked that I can experience what ever I have to experience to allow and I am always flamboyant, passionate and arrogant I want a quantity number of people to be able to experience relieve from their suffering that they can become more KC. And I am ready to accept whatever may come on me that will also purify me in the process that will make it easier for a quantity number of devotees. I offer that offering for the coming year. So this is a letter offered to Prabhupada presenting this and saying this is what I am ready to do next year, but if you want it to happen this year let it be. So I kind of expected next year that I am going to be leaving not this year. Now yesterday when I went in for the cats can as I laid on the machine, to see if the cancer has spread to the other parts of the body, I offer my whole body essence to Prabhupada. Ten minutes later we found that it was at least at the fourth level. So from all material situations, I have melanoma cancer not just the skin, I have this huge tumor so it is like my whole foot is practically cancerous. Now all this came overnight. This happened so sort time after making this prayer. While I was traveling in Canada I had such pain in my foot that I could not sleep, I never had that. Week later I was suppose to travel so I realize that this is an indicator that I need to check on this. Maybe you noticed that in the last year I mentioned perhaps leaving. In Detroit I mentioned it. I was not planning on do that, It was not my desire, my desire is not to stay or leave, whatever can help, whatever is a call from my Guru, cause my desire is that. I am not willing maintain this level of consciousness while I see so many people suffering and I am convinced that I going to help do something. Whether it is leaving from here, and having influenced or whether it is staying, whatever it takes. Now things are on a jet path….a rocket speed. In just less then ten days I found out the tumor is worst, I go to several oncologist in Detroit. They said that I should have surgery right away. So based on the top sergeant here who says it has to come out. They saw the MRI, saw the X-rays. Nobody had any clue that it was cancer. As a matter of fact from the MRI it suggested that the tumor is able to taken out, previously I did not have it taken out, twenty years ago when I first starting to have some trouble, ten years I had a biopsy. The biopsy said it is benign if I have it taken out I would loose full function of the foot so I just recently started having some more trouble. Last year in India at the Bhaktivedanta hospital he said the same thing. Then I had acupuncture it seemly helped to center it and raise it up so it is a little more of the bone then the acupuncture said that I should also have surgery. So I got it from the allopathic as well a from the natural path. So this surgeon felt that he could take it out without loosing control of the foot. When I went in the operation room, he cut it and then he knew that something was wrong then. The whole skin changed. I have a birthmark on the foot, this whole foot is black so the whole foot is like sort of similar to…like a mold. At the operation I said to Madhava that he though that I had cancer. Madhava could not tell anybody cause he could be sued for malpractice. The paththoligist call me that night and told me that I had advanced melanoma. So I went in five days later just to see how the stitches were and the doctor had kind of a grave face and he said that" I enjoy being a doctor, but this part I don't like." And so he said that that he had a suspicion in the operating room that you had cancer and he said that he sent it to the pathologist and he confirmed it. He said it is very serious; you have to do something right away. They tried to call the surgeon right away while we were there so we can see the surgeon. So Madhava thought that we should walk it through, cause they have one of the best melanoma clinics at the Washington hospital where they focus only on that. So I went to see then there and the head of the center came and involved seven or eight people and I knew that it was serious. So I had no clue that anything like that was going to happen, but I knew that something was going on very unusual totally out of my control, because when I went in for the pre-op work that doctor called me that night very disturbed to say that you cant have an operation now, you have serious diabetes and he has to check in with primary care and get it medicated and get it under control. I had no symptoms of diabetes… I told the doctors " there must be a mistake I had blood work only fourteen days ago and I have a lot of diabetes in my family and get checks almost every year and my blood work was ok. But I was almost 400. So here in like ten days have this accelerated tumor have sugar diabetes, I get the operation and I found out that I have cancer. So my understanding or reflection is that Prabhupada seems to be calling back. Maybe not….now how and what he does with it , I'm Ok. Right now devotees are writing to me from all over the world, Devotees have 24-hour kirtaan the way the leaders are praying, they do special pujas. I see all of this Krsna allowing to have more purity, more potency to stage a change or allowing to help others as well as myself to focus deeper and that we have to be ready to go the extra mile for the devotees. Now my life is a life of enjoyment, spiritual enjoyment. Travel 30,40 countries, seminars, workshops and everywhere I go I have a house to stay. So it is like why should I be having this kind of experience when so many devotees cant figure out what to do when they get sick, so many devotees mental disturbance. So I believe this philosophy I am totally convinced this is not my first realm with Prabhupada. I totally convinsed that is not the first time I have ever done this, but I am also aware of the potency of allowing yourself to be used. -------------------------- The following is a message from HH Bhakti Charu Maharaj from 4 days ago: Yesterday afternoon, after learning about Bhakti Tirtha Maharaj's diagnosis, I phoned him at the phone number that Romapada Maharaj very kindly provided. Although I was feeling very emotional, Maharaj greeted me in such a hearty way that the heaviness of my heart was immediately dissipated. I had an extremely enlivening and uplifting discussion with Maharaj for about half an hour. Maharaj felt an overwhelming concern about the state of affairs in ISKCON. There are so many difficulties in our movement. So many devotees are losing faith in Krishna Consciousness, so many children have been abused, so many marriages are breaking up. There is so much suffering. He wished that he could do something to help our movement overcome these crises, and he felt the most effective way to do so is by purifying himself. He considered that in ISKCON, he has gotten everything. He is traveling, preaching, attending seminars, meeting very important people. In this way, he felt that he is enjoying his situation as a leader of ISKCON. He prayed to Srila Prabhupada that this is not what he should really want; what he really wanted is purification. He asked Srila Prabhupada to help him become purified. Maharaj considers that this is actually his purification. He feels that his only goal now, as it has always been, is that whatever Srila Prabhupada desires, whatever Krishna desires, let that be. He prays to them that in whatever situation he is, he can take that opportunity to preach Krishna Consciousness and become a better devotee. Maharaj is certainly one of the most wonderful, exemplary devotees in our movement. I remember, when Srila Prabhupada was in Vrindavan during his final pastimes, many devotees would write to His Divine Grace, but Prabhupada was most interested in hearing the letters about book distribution. Among the letters describing book distribution, I very vividly recall that Prabhupada was very eager to receive letters from Bhakti Tirtha Maharaj describing how he was distributing books behind the Iron Curtain. In one of his letters, Maharaj narrated that he was in a university when he sensed that somebody was following him. Obviously, there were many spies in the Communist countries in those days. In order to escape, he opened a door and walked into the room. It happened to be an office, and the gentleman sitting inside turned out to be a professor in the university. Maharaj pretended as if he had come to see him. They started to talk, and not only did Maharaj escape from the spy, but he sold the professor a set of books! He would write about so many such exciting experiences. Bhakti Tirtha Maharaj is not an ordinary soul. He is a very, very special personality. Although it pains us to see him in this condition, one thing is certain: Krishna uses His devotees for His own special purpose. In course of doing so, He rewards them most wonderfully. Obviously Krishna will reward someone who so sincerely wants to become purified. Krishna must have a wonderful plan for Maharaj, and in due course, it will be revealed to us. Maharaj said that he does not mind if he has to leave because he feels that wherever he goes, Krishna will allow him to serve Him, but I expressed that he has to stay on because our movement needs him. A vaisnava like him purifies just by his darshan, what to speak of getting his wonderful association. I pray to Srila Prabhupada that he takes care of his very dear son. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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