to devotee about Daily Reflection June 22 - Love

[Guest guest]

devotee wrote:

 

There are two kinds of love. There’s the love of selfish attachment, and

there’s the love of surrender. When we love selfishly, we only think about

what’

s in it for me: I love you as long as my needs are fulfilled. When we love

with unselfish surrender, we abandon all of our own personal considerations

and give ourselves over to our beloved.

 

 

 

Dear devotee ~ this was very good for me to read this morning. When I

learned my mother was dying, I had to make an agreement with myself to surrender,

let go, of all the hurts of the past six years. I thought I had done this, and

was mentally preparing myself for taking care of some things here, so I

could make the trip. And then when I talked to my stepfather yesterday, he

dropped a word bomb on me. It doesn't matter what he said; only that all the pain I

thought I had surrendered came swirling up to the top again, leaving me

confused, devastated, hurting, and all my physical symptoms in a major flare. So

I guess I hadn't really surrendered. But sometimes I get very confused about

this issue of surrendering and unselfish love. I think of this everytime I

chant the mantra for Chandra.

 

I don't think surrendering means standing up tall with a target on your

chest and allowing people to lob arrows of negativity at you. I don't think it

means laying down and being a doormat and letting people walk on you. But in my

life, this is what I was taught about surrendering, about "acceptance." I

still haven't figured out how to do what this verse says.

I think it would mean standing tall (no target) in confidence of doing my

best ... still don't know what to do about the arrows. Duck? Dodge? Wear the

Armor of the Goddess?

 

What would Swamiji do? What would Shree Maa do? If someone close to them

said or did something hurtful or mean or unnecessarily spiteful? I have not been

around them enough to know what they would do, and I know that part of the

guru/desciple relationship is observing and emulating the gurus. Maybe someone

at the Mandir has an answer to this question.

How would Shree Maa respond if She were going somewhere She really wanted to

go, and someone there said, "well, you can come, but Swamiji is not

welcome." Would She go anyway. If She didn't go, would She give the person a reason?

 

This is a real struggle for me, and one I don't have the luxury of time to

figure out. All I know to do is behave as my gurus would have me behave, if I

can keep this thought in my mind long enough to do it. Jai Maa , Jai Swamiji ~

Linda

[Guest guest]

, nierika wrote:

 

 

Dear Linda,

 

Just as I was reading your mail these thoughts came to my mind.

If your mother is really critical and you Do from your heart want to

go see her, then you should go. Families are very complicated and a

constant source of sorrow, confusion and heartache but I feel

underneath all of it somewhere are threads a love that binds a

family together. Of course these lay buried under all the piles of

hurts, expectations etc.

I really do not know anything about your situation but from my own I

am learning that sometimes being a little thick skinned (not letting

a lot of stuff bother you) and having a purity of purpose helps.

After all we are only answerable to ourselves, but have no control

over the actions of others.

 

Please take heart, all will be well.

 

Ruchi

>

>

> devotee wrote:

>

> There are two kinds of love. There’s the love of selfish

attachment, and

> there’s the love of surrender. When we love selfishly, we only

think about

> what’

> s in it for me: I love you as long as my needs are fulfilled.

When we love

> with unselfish surrender, we abandon all of our own personal

considerations

> and give ourselves over to our beloved.

>

>

>

> Dear devotee ~ this was very good for me to read this morning.

When I

> learned my mother was dying, I had to make an agreement with

myself to surrender,

> let go, of all the hurts of the past six years. I thought I had

done this, and

> was mentally preparing myself for taking care of some things here,

so I

> could make the trip. And then when I talked to my stepfather

yesterday, he

> dropped a word bomb on me. It doesn't matter what he said; only

that all the pain I

> thought I had surrendered came swirling up to the top again,

leaving me

> confused, devastated, hurting, and all my physical symptoms in a

major flare. So

> I guess I hadn't really surrendered. But sometimes I get very

confused about

> this issue of surrendering and unselfish love. I think of this

everytime I

> chant the mantra for Chandra.

>

> I don't think surrendering means standing up tall with a target on

your

> chest and allowing people to lob arrows of negativity at you. I

don't think it

> means laying down and being a doormat and letting people walk on

you. But in my

> life, this is what I was taught about surrendering,

about "acceptance." I

> still haven't figured out how to do what this verse says.

> I think it would mean standing tall (no target) in confidence of

doing my

> best ... still don't know what to do about the arrows. Duck?

Dodge? Wear the

> Armor of the Goddess?

>

> What would Swamiji do? What would Shree Maa do? If someone close

to them

> said or did something hurtful or mean or unnecessarily spiteful? I

have not been

> around them enough to know what they would do, and I know that

part of the

> guru/desciple relationship is observing and emulating the gurus.

Maybe someone

> at the Mandir has an answer to this question.

> How would Shree Maa respond if She were going somewhere She

really wanted to

> go, and someone there said, "well, you can come, but Swamiji is

not

> welcome." Would She go anyway. If She didn't go, would She give

the person a reason?

>

> This is a real struggle for me, and one I don't have the luxury of

time to

> figure out. All I know to do is behave as my gurus would have me

behave, if I

> can keep this thought in my mind long enough to do it. Jai Maa ,

Jai Swamiji ~

> Linda

>