Fw:-Experienced : Experienced Darshan / Omnipresence - Contributed by Renu

[Guest guest]

SAI RAM.

 

Hello.. My name is Renu and today I am going to share something that

I will never forget as long as I'm alive. We are a very happy

family, mother, father, sister and myself. We are all highly

spiritual and god-fearing and believer in SaiBaba. To me, SaiBaba is

more than just God. He is my friend and only companion for anything.

I used to talk and cry to Him whenever there were problems. My

mother was very sick... and every time her condition became worse, I

used to chat Baba's name repeatedly, apply udi on my amma's forehead

and chest.

 

I used to sing Baba's songs in faith that my amma would become all

right... maybe it was because of Baba's grace that she survived many

times... but.. march 30th, we admitted her in the hospital due to

grave conditions... they kept her in the ICU and did not allow me,

my sis or my appa to see her also. we were worried a lot.. I wanted

her to survive.. I loved her a lot.. all the faith that I have today

is only because of her upbringing. Evening went and I last saw her

at 7:15. I was outside and crying and praying to Baba to make a

miracle happen that day... I was singing His song... I always have

Baba's photo with me.. I asked the nurse to keep baba's photo under

the pillow on my mother's bed and she did.. while I was praying

outside the ICU, there was another relative for someone in the ICU

and seeing me chanting and singing Baba's songs, he came up to me

and gave me Baba's udi and told me not to fear.. I thought this was

an indication that my mother had Baba's blessings and that she was

going to get better. I kept the udi packet in my left hand with my

fist closed. I did not remove it at all.. I did not move my fingers

too.

 

Night came and at 11:05 my mother was dying... the doctors called us

and said that her brain has failed... I cried to him and then no

news at all.... the doctors closed the ICU and did not allow us to

see her. Throughout the night I prayed, cried and begged Baba for

help for my amma. Early morning between 2:30 and 3:00, I was

thinking of Baba very deeply in my mind and was wanting for some

miracle to happen... and glory to Him.... I saw him... I was able to

see Baba in orange dress walking up the staircase with a stick in

His hand and looking slowly at each step as He climbed up... and

then He turned towards me and walked towards me... I was over

confident that my mother is going to experience a miracle and I'll

get her back.. but that did not happen... I lost her... I was

shattered... for a few minutes, I even thought Baba ditched me....

but I can't even think that way.. because I don't have anybody else

also... so again I went back to him.... and I told myself.. maybe my

mother was lucky.. Baba himself came to take her with Him. She was

lucky. I keep telling myself that Baba's udi and His photo under her

pillow did this.

 

Yes.. I lost my mother and even as I'm typing this experience I am

crying for 2 reasons... one because I lost her forever... my beloved

mother.. my chellam... but another reason because I was able to see

Baba... I'm crying with the feeling that Baba graced me and my

mother.. He showed His darshan to me.. he loves me I know that... he

will love me... and I love him too.

 

I am not old enough to comment about any principles or sayings...

but I know that anyone who believes in Him strongly... He will show

up and maybe He may not always grant us what we ask for... but He'll

be there with us.. for us..

 

I love you Baba.

 

Contributed by Renu, Chennai