A Story From New York...please post more stories! :)

[Guest guest]

Namah Shivayah,

 

Thanks to Prajna for posting that great story. I hope some more people will share their

experiences from the tour. I love reading about experiences with Mother.

 

Here is one of my favorite stories from the NYC Devi Bhava... I wrote about all of the

experiences here: http://ananthasree.blogspot.com/2006/07/epic-post-on-8-days-with-

mother.html

 

Garlanding Mother With The Kali Garland:

 

I had spent quite a bit of time making a Kali garland of skulls for Amma. It was very

dramatic looking, the skulls made of styrofoam from a mold...about 3 inches tall with red

velvet globes in between and a red satin neck.

 

As I approached the stage, one of the girls who sings and travels with Amma (I

think her name is Prana) noticed me holding the Kali garland and looked at it, suprised. I

watched her make some gesture, and all of a sudden the musicians began playing a Kali

bhajan! I became so overwhelmed at that moment, my memory blacked out and I cannot

recall, for the life of me, specifically what the song was. I just remember feeling as if time

itself slowed down and everything was in slow motion.

 

Then, I was one person behind Mother in the darshan line. She saw me approaching her

and looked at me with such an intense look….I wish I could describe it, but I can't. I went

all over trying to find a photo of her with that same expression on her face…because I

never want to forget it. She looked like this as she saw me coming, and then again later,

she looked at me like this after I garlanded her. Usually, she is so smiley and

beaming...but I found that most of my darshans this tour were with a very serious, intense

gaze. Kali all the way...what did I expect? I was about to garland her as Kali after all! I was

watching the old footage of Mother in the early days of Devi Bhava and Krishna Bhava, and

the ways she looked at me when I garlanded her was reminiscent of that. As I approached

her eyes locked on me fiercely.

 

I moved forward and stood up to garland her. As I slowly placed it over her head, she was

looking down at her shoulders and her chest with a serious and somewhat surprised

expression as it came down around her. No smile whatsoever. I straightened it around her

neck a little bit and knelt before her, expecting her to take me in for a hug immediately, as

the lines were moving very fast. But she didn't.

 

Time stood still.

 

Darshan just stopped.

 

The Kali bhajan was playing. She looked at the garland and touched a few of the skulls,

turning them over and looking at them. I knelt before her with my hands on her lap,

watching every nuance in her face and resolving to commit it all to memory. She looked

serious and somewhat taken aback, and when I tried to describe it later, I came up with

the analogy of someone seeing snow for the first time. That's how she looked at it. She

looked at the garland and then looked up at me, staring intensely into my eyes. Then she

looked down at the garland again, and then up at me. Then she began speaking in

Malayalaam and Geetha translated to me. She was asking if I made it and what it was made

from. She touched the skulls some more and then looked at me. I couldn't believe how

long she was taking admiring the garland. She was manifesting Kali bhava at full

spectrum....my heart was so filled, I had butterflies in my stomach.

 

Then, I felt her hand on my back as she pulled me into her arms very, very slowly. As she

pulled me in, I kept my eyes on her face and saw that she was looking upward toward the

sky, with a very deep look in her eyes as she pulled me in. "Daughter, Daughter, Daughter"

she chanted over and over again. My mouth was pressed up against her neck and I

remember inhaling and exhaling as deeply as I could. Inhaling her and exhaling into

her….and she felt this, because as I breathed harder she squeezed me tighter and tighter

into her.

 

Then, she released me and I couldn't help but smile. When she smiled back at me, it

wasn't her usual beaming smile but it was a rather weak smile, with all of the intensity of

emotion coming primarily from the eyes. It was as if everything else dissolved but for her

eyes. It was as if it were a forced smile and that she was only smiling back at me because I

was. Initially, it was just a fierce stare, that slowly turned into a small smile. Her eyes

followed me until I was out of her sight. I was utterly overwhelmed. Amma had granted

this child's wish of seeing her as Kali.

 

Jai Ma! Jai Ma! Jai Kali Ma!

 

~Ananthasree

[Guest guest]

Jay Amba

 

Dearest Anathasree

 

I remember seeing a gril with this garland , and thought wow that is Brave ! ,

anyway thank You for posting your experiences , I agree on NYC vibes . I am NY yorker

getting burned out by this place , and hope to see Amma next year on the west coast .

Amma did tell me I am going through difficult time and will pray for me LOL..

 

joanna

[Guest guest]

Ah, that was you and your partner with that gorgeous garland! I was

wondering if we had seen you and not recognized. Jeff and I were sitting on

Mother's left side, waiting to watch his friend Dmitiri who was going for

his first Darshan right in back of you, and remember the intense, astounding

look on Her face. She really had a bhava going on, and admired the skulls

with an otherworldlyness that was remarkable from 8 feet away -- can only

imagine it at 8 inches.

 

Thank you for sharing. And making that garland. I was thinking about it

last night actually, staring at the kalidevi doll's skullgarland we have

decorating Shiva right now. loveprashanti

[Guest guest]

thanks for posting ananthasree and also for the beautiful poem

in "Immortal Bliss" recent issue.

 

jai amma kali!

 

Ammachi, "Ananthasree" <ananthasree wrote:

Namah Shivayah,

 

......

Jai Ma! Jai Ma! Jai Kali Ma!

 

~Ananthasree