To Saswati about making friends

August 26, 2006

Dear Saswati ~ thank you for so openly sharing your dilemma with the group.

I empathize with you deeply because I could write the very same words. I also

apologize for the length of this post, but felt it was important to share. I

have dealt with horrible memories, "waking dream" nightmares that could

invade and violate me anytime or anywhere. And as you can probably tell from some

of my recent posts, I am dealing with a very similar situation now. I have

repeated it over and over.

I am sorry if this violates some tenant of the idea of karma, but I don't

believe anyone deserves to be abused or tortured. And very few people know just

how prevalant this is in our society. Depending on the type of abuse being

looked at statistically, it is 1 in 5 or 1 in 3 children, before the age of 13.

The first lesson I chose to learn was not to repeat the cycle.

I would never beat or hit my daughter or yell and scream at her or threaten

her in any way. In many ways I was successful, but in some areas where I was

unaware, I did create an environment that was not as healthy as, in

retrospect, I would have liked. Yet, despite the fact that she does have her own

struggles, she has never had to deal with the horror of abuse.

My second lesson came when I struggled with the "waking dream" nightmares.

Being an artist, and very visually oriented, I suppose it is not unusual that

this is how the abuse would effect me. The images I "saw" floating in front of

my face were terrible ... really too terrible to share in this forum.

Therapist after therapist kept telling me, "well, you are aware, so you won't do

these things." This was not comforting, nor did I believe them. I lived in

constant fear of my own self. This may be one of the worst effects of abuse. I

was afraid of my thoughts.

I was afraid of my feelings. I was afraid to move.

But, like in a good fairy tale, I had helpers. I was talking with my art

teacher/mentor one day and said, "I don't have a good mind." (She taught me both

in painting and in art history, which, of course, is very mental.) She turned

and looked at me; she was a tall woman; and with a no nonsense look on her

face said, in a voice that brooked no disagreement, "You have a wonderful

mind, Linda." And then, to help me learn it, she began to give me things to do to

help her out in her classes ... like an assistant. Then I had one therapist,

finally, who explained my terrible visions in a way I could understand. She

said, "Linda, you are very visual. When you were a child, you weren't allowed

to speak, so you learned to make pictures with your body and your mind." She

went on to tell me that the mind is like a tv set. She said, "you can

control the images; you can turn the channel, or you can make them different." What

worked for me was making them different. Of course, I realize that abuse

affects every person differently, and each person walks their own path to

healing. But I also believe that sharing can help a great deal.

All this was part of of a lifelong healing process that began when I left

home and continues to this day. What also helped me tremendously was discovering

the writings of the Vedas and other Eastern scriptures. When I was a

teenager, my mother decided to convert to Catholicism, the worst time possible, I

believe, for an impressionable, growing young mind. And the Church had not yet

come to terms with the messages it was choosing to deliver, so it was as

though I had a new layer of terror added over the one that already existed. I was

told I was born evil, and that I was especially evil because I was a female.

I was terrified of burning in hell. I was terrified of every thought. What

if I had a "bad" one? When I was 18, I told my mother I was not going to

church anymore. She didn't like it, but periodically, this part of me, that I

think as my Higher Self, asserts itself and insists that I make a change. Still,

it was a long time before I got all those bats out of my belfry, and part of

what helped was Hinduism, though at the time I had no formal name for what I

was reading. Yet what I found was the exact opposite ... we are all born

essentially good; we forget, get confused, get distracted, etc., but the

goodness is always there waiting to be rediscovered, a precious jewel.

And just recently, in reading the "Advanced Shiva Puja," I came across these

very words: "Being firm in that supreme wisdom which fills consciousness,

that inner light of the nectar of bliss within all beings born, may we perform

all action from that imperishable truth..." There it was again, reinforcing

my experience of Eastern Spirituality as a system which holds the essential

goodness of all. Back in my 20's, when I first discovered this, I felt as

though a dark veil had been removed from my spirit.

Please Saswati, don't further doubt or torture yourself (we abused are very

good at beating our own selves up) with wondering why it happened to you. You

never deserved it. No one does. And perhaps one way of working through all of

this is to work with the Reliever of Suffering, Shiva. As I am discovering,

just reading the "Advanced Shiva Puja" is an amazing revelation (and all who

know me here, know that, because of my health, doing actual pujas is beyond

my capacity, but in the introduction, Swamiji says, "Read through the pujas

and read the translations. Some mantras will call to your, something will touch

your heart and illuminate an inspiration, and this is where you could

begin."

Another wonderful book that Swamiji has translated is the Rudrashtadhyayi

(available on the Devi Mandir website bookstore, of course). Here is what

Swamiji says in his introduction about this scripture, "The Rudrashtadhyayi

celebrates Shiva, the Consciousness of Infinite Goodness, in his form as the

Reliever of Sufferings. Rudra comes from the samskrta, asru trayate, he who takes

away the tears. Rudra is the form of Shiv who takes away our tears and put an

end to all suffering."

I think I've said enough, but I hope you realize that I understand your

suffering, though it is unique, as you are unique. If you wish to write to me

off-digest, there is more I could share with you about my healing journey. But,

please Saswati, hold that phrase, "that inner light of the nectar of bliss

within all beings born" to your heart and know the truth of it.

Jai Swamiji, Shiva Ki Jai ~ Linda

Saswati wrote:

I have a question regarding Chris' earlier thoughts on whether "bad" things

can happen to a person and how to allow oneself to make friends with all

experiences. I have some very traumatic, violent experiences in my past. When

these memories come back up what do I do? How do I reconcile myself with

them? I try to accept them by telling myself that there is a greater reason for

everything, but I just don't understand. it is possible that in my last

life I did something so evil that my I am now the victim of my own previous

sins? It certainly doesn't bring me solace to think that I could have behaved

this way toward another being.

Also, I do not know how to feel about my offender. Is it right to feel anger

and bitterness toward him or the things that he did to me? Or should I

accept him and forgive him, as he was only a vehicle for carrying out my karma?

When these experiences come up, I feel tremendous sadness and instability.

How do I deal with this? Do I just surrender to the pain...What can be the

greater lessson in experiencing torture?...How do I "show respect" to these

memories, to this time in my life, to my offender? I know that the ultimate

answer is to learn to detach from all of this through mediation and yoga.

This is my greatest goal, though sometimes I feel I am so far from reaching it.

Any advice would be so appreciated...

August 29, 2006

Hello,

I am a new member of this group. Swamiji sent me the link about two

weeks ago. I've been following some of the discussion threads with

great interest but have not contributed so far. Saswati, and Linda,

your post really touched me and I hope you don't mind if I respond.

I am so very sorry to hear about your suffering and pain, and feel

really humbled at the courage that you both and the others show on a

daily basis. I don't profess to understand the workings of Karma, so

I won't go there. I just want to say that there is a different way

of looking at this too. If it wasn't for pain and suffering, most of

us would not turn to God, would not be here at all. In a sense,

suffering is God's way of turning our face and feet towards him.

As a child, I remember a picture of Ramakrishna in samadhi in my

grandmother's house. Below it were inscribed two lines:

"Shokol duaar hoite phiriya, tomaar duaare eshechhi

Shokoler preme bimukh hoiya, tomakei bhaalobesechi."

Translated:

Turned away from every door, I have arrived at yours

Disappointed in everyone's love, I have loved only you.

I am also including the devotional lines of Rajanikanta Sen. I will

try to translate it for you but I can't do it justice. If anyone is

interested in the Bengali original, I will post it in English script.

(He) has made me a beggar in every way to shatter my pride,

Thus he has driven away fame, wealth, status and health from me.

All that, in the shape of Maya, had cast me in the well of Ego,

So in his kindness he removed every obstacle and made me poor and

helpless.

I have not lost my Body sense yet, I am still full of concern for it,

I am full of the idea that the Body is Me.

So he has made me a beggar in every way to shatter my pride.

I thought I was a good writer, that everyone loved my music,

So in his kindness, he gave me disease and a lot of pain.

He is teaching me with such love and care to shatter my pride.

Papia

, nierika wrote:

>

> Dear Saswati ~ thank you for so openly sharing your dilemma with

the group.

> I empathize with you deeply because I could write the very same

words. I also

> apologize for the length of this post, but felt it was important

to share. I

> have dealt with horrible memories, "waking dream" nightmares that

could

> invade and violate me anytime or anywhere. And as you can

probably tell from some

> of my recent posts, I am dealing with a very similar situation

now. I have

> repeated it over and over.

>

> I am sorry if this violates some tenant of the idea of karma, but

I don't

> believe anyone deserves to be abused or tortured. And very few

people know just

> how prevalant this is in our society. Depending on the type of

abuse being

> looked at statistically, it is 1 in 5 or 1 in 3 children, before

the age of 13.

> The first lesson I chose to learn was not to repeat the cycle.

> I would never beat or hit my daughter or yell and scream at her or

threaten

> her in any way. In many ways I was successful, but in some areas

where I was

> unaware, I did create an environment that was not as healthy as,

in

> retrospect, I would have liked. Yet, despite the fact that she

does have her own

> struggles, she has never had to deal with the horror of abuse.

>

> My second lesson came when I struggled with the "waking dream"

nightmares.

> Being an artist, and very visually oriented, I suppose it is not

unusual that

> this is how the abuse would effect me. The images I "saw" floating

in front of

> my face were terrible ... really too terrible to share in this

forum.

> Therapist after therapist kept telling me, "well, you are aware,

so you won't do

> these things." This was not comforting, nor did I believe them. I

lived in

> constant fear of my own self. This may be one of the worst

effects of abuse. I

> was afraid of my thoughts.

> I was afraid of my feelings. I was afraid to move.

>

> But, like in a good fairy tale, I had helpers. I was talking with

my art

> teacher/mentor one day and said, "I don't have a good mind." (She

taught me both

> in painting and in art history, which, of course, is very mental.)

She turned

> and looked at me; she was a tall woman; and with a no nonsense

look on her

> face said, in a voice that brooked no disagreement, "You have a

wonderful

> mind, Linda." And then, to help me learn it, she began to give me

things to do to

> help her out in her classes ... like an assistant. Then I had one

therapist,

> finally, who explained my terrible visions in a way I could

understand. She

> said, "Linda, you are very visual. When you were a child, you

weren't allowed

> to speak, so you learned to make pictures with your body and your

mind." She

> went on to tell me that the mind is like a tv set. She said, "you

can

> control the images; you can turn the channel, or you can make

them different." What

> worked for me was making them different. Of course, I realize

that abuse

> affects every person differently, and each person walks their own

path to

> healing. But I also believe that sharing can help a great deal.

>

> All this was part of of a lifelong healing process that began when

I left

> home and continues to this day. What also helped me tremendously

was discovering

> the writings of the Vedas and other Eastern scriptures. When I

was a

> teenager, my mother decided to convert to Catholicism, the worst

time possible, I

> believe, for an impressionable, growing young mind. And the

Church had not yet

> come to terms with the messages it was choosing to deliver, so it

was as

> though I had a new layer of terror added over the one that

already existed. I was

> told I was born evil, and that I was especially evil because I

was a female.

> I was terrified of burning in hell. I was terrified of every

thought. What

> if I had a "bad" one? When I was 18, I told my mother I was not

going to

> church anymore. She didn't like it, but periodically, this part

of me, that I

> think as my Higher Self, asserts itself and insists that I make a

change. Still,

> it was a long time before I got all those bats out of my belfry,

and part of

> what helped was Hinduism, though at the time I had no formal name

for what I

> was reading. Yet what I found was the exact opposite ... we are

all born

> essentially good; we forget, get confused, get distracted, etc.,

but the

> goodness is always there waiting to be rediscovered, a precious

jewel.

>

> And just recently, in reading the "Advanced Shiva Puja," I came

across these

> very words: "Being firm in that supreme wisdom which fills

consciousness,

> that inner light of the nectar of bliss within all beings born,

may we perform

> all action from that imperishable truth..." There it was again,

reinforcing

> my experience of Eastern Spirituality as a system which holds the

essential

> goodness of all. Back in my 20's, when I first discovered this, I

felt as

> though a dark veil had been removed from my spirit.

>

> Please Saswati, don't further doubt or torture yourself (we abused

are very

> good at beating our own selves up) with wondering why it happened

to you. You

> never deserved it. No one does. And perhaps one way of working

through all of

> this is to work with the Reliever of Suffering, Shiva. As I am

discovering,

> just reading the "Advanced Shiva Puja" is an amazing revelation

(and all who

> know me here, know that, because of my health, doing actual pujas

is beyond

> my capacity, but in the introduction, Swamiji says, "Read through

the pujas

> and read the translations. Some mantras will call to your,

something will touch

> your heart and illuminate an inspiration, and this is where you

could

> begin."

>

> Another wonderful book that Swamiji has translated is the

Rudrashtadhyayi

> (available on the Devi Mandir website bookstore, of course). Here

is what

> Swamiji says in his introduction about this scripture, "The

Rudrashtadhyayi

> celebrates Shiva, the Consciousness of Infinite Goodness, in his

form as the

> Reliever of Sufferings. Rudra comes from the samskrta, asru

trayate, he who takes

> away the tears. Rudra is the form of Shiv who takes away our tears

and put an

> end to all suffering."

>

> I think I've said enough, but I hope you realize that I understand

your

> suffering, though it is unique, as you are unique. If you wish to

write to me

> off-digest, there is more I could share with you about my healing

journey. But,

> please Saswati, hold that phrase, "that inner light of the nectar

of bliss

> within all beings born" to your heart and know the truth of it.

>

> Jai Swamiji, Shiva Ki Jai ~ Linda

>

> Saswati wrote:

>

> I have a question regarding Chris' earlier thoughts on

whether "bad" things

> can happen to a person and how to allow oneself to make friends

with all

> experiences. I have some very traumatic, violent experiences in

my past. When

> these memories come back up what do I do? How do I reconcile

myself with

> them? I try to accept them by telling myself that there is a

greater reason for

> everything, but I just don't understand. it is possible that in

my last

> life I did something so evil that my I am now the victim of my

own previous

> sins? It certainly doesn't bring me solace to think that I could

have behaved

> this way toward another being.

> Also, I do not know how to feel about my offender. Is it right to

feel anger

> and bitterness toward him or the things that he did to me? Or

should I

> accept him and forgive him, as he was only a vehicle for carrying

out my karma?

> When these experiences come up, I feel tremendous sadness and

instability.

> How do I deal with this? Do I just surrender to the pain...What

can be the

> greater lessson in experiencing torture?...How do I "show

respect" to these

> memories, to this time in my life, to my offender? I know that

the ultimate

> answer is to learn to detach from all of this through mediation

and yoga.

> This is my greatest goal, though sometimes I feel I am so far

from reaching it.

> Any advice would be so appreciated...

>

August 29, 2006

Hello everyone:

I am a new member of this group. Swamiji sent me the link about two weeks ago. I’ve been following some of the discussion threads with great interest but have not contributed so far. I am sending this via email as well as webpost, since I am not sure if this is going through.

Saswati, your post really touched me and I hope you don’t mind if I respond.

I am so very sorry to hear about your suffering and pain, and feel really humbled at the courage that you, Linda, and the others show on a daily basis. I don’t profess to understand the workings of Karma, so I won’t go there. I just want to say that there is a different way of looking at this too. If it wasn’t for pain and suffering, most of us would not turn to God, would not be here at all. In a sense, suffering is God’s way of turning our face and feet towards him.

As a child, I remember a picture of Ramakrishna in samadhi in my grandmother’s house. Below it were inscribed two lines:

“Shokol duaar hoite phiriya, tomaar duaare eshechhi

Shokoler preme bimukh hoiya, tomakei bhaalobesechi.”

Translated:

Turned away from every door, I have arrived at yours

Disappointed in all love, I have learned to love you.

I am also including the devotional lines of Rajanikanta Sen. I will try to translate it for you but most of it is lost in translation. If anyone is interested in the Bengali original, I will post it in English script.

(He) has made me a beggar in every way to shatter my pride,

Thus he has driven away fame, wealth, status and health from me.

All that, in the shape of Maya, had cast me in the well of Ego,

So in his kindness he removed every obstacle and made me poor and helpless.

I have not lost my Body sense yet, I am still full of concern for my body,

I am full of the idea that the Body is me.

So he has made me a beggar in every way to shatter my pride.

I thought I was a good writer, that everyone loves my music,

So in his kindness, he gave me disease and a lot of pain.

He is teaching me with such great care to shatter my pride.

Papia

nierika (AT) aol (DOT) com wrote: Dear Saswati ~ thank you for so openly sharing your dilemma with the group. I empathize with you deeply because I could write the very same words. I also apologize for the length of this post, but felt it was important to share. I have dealt with horrible memories, "waking dream" nightmares that could invade and violate me anytime or anywhere. And as you can probably tell from some of my recent posts, I am dealing with a very similar situation now. I have repeated it over and over.

I am sorry if this violates some tenant of the idea of karma, but I don't believe anyone deserves to be abused or tortured. And very few people know just how prevalant this is in our society. Depending on the type of abuse being looked at statistically, it is 1 in 5 or 1 in 3 children, before the age of 13. The first lesson I chose to learn was not to repeat the cycle.

I would never beat or hit my daughter or yell and scream at her or threaten her in any way. In many ways I was successful, but in some areas where I was unaware, I did create an environment that was not as healthy as, in retrospect, I would have liked. Yet, despite the fact that she does have her own struggles, she has never had to deal with the horror of abuse.

My second lesson came when I struggled with the "waking dream" nightmares. Being an artist, and very visually oriented, I suppose it is not unusual that this is how the abuse would effect me. The images I "saw" floating in front of my face were terrible ... really too terrible to share in this forum. Therapist after therapist kept telling me, "well, you are aware, so you won't do these things." This was not comforting, nor did I believe them. I lived in constant fear of my own self. This may be one of the worst effects of abuse. I was afraid of my thoughts.

I was afraid of my feelings. I was afraid to move.

But, like in a good fairy tale, I had helpers. I was talking with my art teacher/mentor one day and said, "I don't have a good mind." (She taught me both in painting and in art history, which, of course, is very mental.) She turned and looked at me; she was a tall woman; and with a no nonsense look on her face said, in a voice that brooked no disagreement, "You have a wonderful mind, Linda." And then, to help me learn it, she began to give me things to do to help her out in her classes ... like an assistant. Then I had one therapist, finally, who explained my terrible visions in a way I could understand. She said, "Linda, you are very visual. When you were a child, you weren't allowed to speak, so you learned to make pictures with your body and your mind." She went on to tell me that the mind is like a tv set. She said, "you can control the images; you can turn the channel, or you can make them different." What worked for me was making them different. Of course, I realize

that abuse affects every person differently, and each person walks their own path to healing. But I also believe that sharing can help a great deal.

All this was part of of a lifelong healing process that began when I left home and continues to this day. What also helped me tremendously was discovering the writings of the Vedas and other Eastern scriptures. When I was a teenager, my mother decided to convert to Catholicism, the worst time possible, I believe, for an impressionable, growing young mind. And the Church had not yet come to terms with the messages it was choosing to deliver, so it was as though I had a new layer of terror added over the one that already existed. I was told I was born evil, and that I was especially evil because I was a female. I was terrified of burning in hell. I was terrified of every thought. What if I had a "bad" one? When I was 18, I told my mother I was not going to church anymore. She didn't like it, but periodically, this part of me, that I think as my Higher Self, asserts itself and insists that I make a change. Still, it was a long time before I got all those bats out of my

belfry, and part of what helped was Hinduism, though at the time I had no formal name for what I was reading. Yet what I found was the exact opposite ... we are all born essentially good; we forget, get confused, get distracted, etc., but the goodness is always there waiting to be rediscovered, a precious jewel.

And just recently, in reading the "Advanced Shiva Puja," I came across these very words: "Being firm in that supreme wisdom which fills consciousness, that inner light of the nectar of bliss within all beings born, may we perform all action from that imperishable truth..." There it was again, reinforcing my experience of Eastern Spirituality as a system which holds the essential goodness of all. Back in my 20's, when I first discovered this, I felt as though a dark veil had been removed from my spirit.

Please Saswati, don't further doubt or torture yourself (we abused are very good at beating our own selves up) with wondering why it happened to you. You never deserved it. No one does. And perhaps one way of working through all of this is to work with the Reliever of Suffering, Shiva. As I am discovering, just reading the "Advanced Shiva Puja" is an amazing revelation (and all who know me here, know that, because of my health, doing actual pujas is beyond my capacity, but in the introduction, Swamiji says, "Read through the pujas and read the translations. Some mantras will call to your, something will touch your heart and illuminate an inspiration, and this is where you could begin."

Another wonderful book that Swamiji has translated is the Rudrashtadhyayi (available on the Devi Mandir website bookstore, of course). Here is what Swamiji says in his introduction about this scripture, "The Rudrashtadhyayi celebrates Shiva, the Consciousness of Infinite Goodness, in his form as the Reliever of Sufferings. Rudra comes from the samskrta, asru trayate, he who takes away the tears. Rudra is the form of Shiv who takes away our tears and put an end to all suffering."

I think I've said enough, but I hope you realize that I understand your suffering, though it is unique, as you are unique. If you wish to write to me off-digest, there is more I could share with you about my healing journey. But, please Saswati, hold that phrase, "that inner light of the nectar of bliss within all beings born" to your heart and know the truth of it.

Jai Swamiji, Shiva Ki Jai ~ Linda

Saswati wrote:

I have a question regarding Chris' earlier thoughts on whether "bad" things can happen to a person and how to allow oneself to make friends with all experiences. I have some very traumatic, violent experiences in my past. When these memories come back up what do I do? How do I reconcile myself with them? I try to accept them by telling myself that there is a greater reason for everything, but I just don't understand. it is possible that in my last life I did something so evil that my I am now the victim of my own previous sins? It certainly doesn't bring me solace to think that I could have behaved this way toward another being.

Also, I do not know how to feel about my offender. Is it right to feel anger and bitterness toward him or the things that he did to me? Or should I accept him and forgive him, as he was only a vehicle for carrying out my karma? When these experiences come up, I feel tremendous sadness and instability. How do I deal with this? Do I just surrender to the pain...What can be the greater lessson in experiencing torture?...How do I "show respect" to these

memories, to this time in my life, to my offender? I know that the ultimate answer is to learn to detach from all of this through mediation and yoga. This is my greatest goal, though sometimes I feel I am so far from reaching it. Any advice would be so appreciated...

Messenger with Voice. Make PC-to-Phone Calls to the US (and 30+ countries) for 2¢/min or less.

August 30, 2006

eHi everybody,

I also am very new to group. Seems we all have experienced bad things in life. Guess if we didn't we wouldn't appreciate the good things so much.

With out going into my issues I'll just add what's been helpful to me incase anyone can use it.

Some believe we plan our re-entery here on earth. We make packs with others to help us on our path. Some believe that the ones who agree to do harm if ness. in order for us to learn are very special friends to us, because they have to experience all the hate it takes to do us harm.

Others say nothing happens to us unless we agree to it.

With these thoughts in mind (true or not) I was able in the past to look at things differently. For example: My oldest daughter was murdered at 14 (1989) when my yongest was only 2 mts old. I didn't show a lot of emotion at furneral because I had him to nurse and KNEW my milk could dry up from stress and if I let any of it affect me NOW, I would be devistated.

I also NEW that there is no death. I had felt her leave her body and smelled her scent when she came to me to let me know she was going. I told myself that she agreed to this in some way. If by no other way by the crowd he(her boyfriend) was with. Even so she was with him to help to get him off drugs and stop selling. So see, she agreed in her own mind that the cost was worth it to help him.. She had recieved threatning calls so she new but felt this was her job. I'm not saying I liked it or wanted it to happen or that she diserved it but that she knew there was no death so it was worth it to her to risk shifting (lossing this life), to help him. I learned so much from it also. I am still learning from it. Still to this day I tell myself I must continue to learn all I can from Her experience to make it worth the pain that she had to suffer from it.

In other words so Her effort will not be in vein or forgotten.

This is only one experience in my life but it has caused me to see things so differently that I thought that it MAY help others to hear it. Keep in mind that there is much more to this experience than I have writen here. As I am not wanting to drag on but just relate a point.

Things that happen to me more directly, as in I am hurt phy, men, or emot, I veiw in much the same way. I try to see what I may have done to bring it about (if anything). Like staying in a dangerious relationship until he phy. harms me and then burns the house down. I new he was capable but didn't think I had a way out.

I think the hardest ones to figure a out are the hurts that are put apon children. We say they didn't ask for it. They are innocent. They have no control over this. When there is a lot of abuse I sometimes wonder if this is somehow a group experience. Say this family has a Karmic past that THEY are working on thogether. That doesn't mean it's ok it's just another way of looking at it. I know you think It is so easy to say, hear and think all this if you haven't experienced it. Or it's easy for you to say but you wern't in my shoes.

We do feel each others pain. Think about it when you see something violent on TV or in reality, don't you feel it along with them. We are all connected, there is no good or bad, everything is what we make it. Try to make something, some small positive thing out of it. How has this negitive experience bettered you, strenghtned you, enlightned you? What knowledge has it given you? What can you learn from it? Can it help you to help others or be simpathic to their pain?

Thank you for sharing!

I hope something in here will help.

Remember we are not in this alone.

We are all traveling together.

Lets make it wonderful.

Sometimes I just have to tell myself to think of the good things and not allow myself you dwell on the neg. Granted we need to think about them from time to time as new informatin comes in, but we need to balance out with the lighter sides of the lessons as well.

With great affection

Debi

Papia Roy <roy.papia > wrote: