Guest guest Posted December 15, 2006 Report Share Posted December 15, 2006 He came two or three times more to hear Siddhanta Sarasvati, but subsequently channeled his reformist fervor as a leader of the Indian independence movement. Is this sentence OK as it is? Or should it be as follows? He came two or three times more to hear Siddhanta Sarasvati, but subsequently channeled his reformist fervor into leading the Indian independence movement. The second version to me suggests that he was THE rather than A leader, which is incorrect. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2006 Report Share Posted December 15, 2006 At 08:59 PM 12/14/2006 -0500, Bhakti Vikasa Swami wrote: >He came two or three times more to hear Siddhanta Sarasvati, but >subsequently channeled his reformist fervor as a leader of the Indian >independence movement. > >Is this sentence OK as it is? Or should it be as follows? > >He came two or three times more to hear Siddhanta Sarasvati, but >subsequently channeled his reformist fervor into leading the Indian >independence movement. > >The second version to me suggests that he was THE rather than A leader, >which is incorrect. right. He came two or three times more to hear Siddhanta Sarasvati, but subsequently channeled his reformist fervor into taking a leading role in the Indian independence movement. Your servant, Dravida dasa >-- > > >Version: 7.5.432 / Virus Database: 268.15.18/586 - Release >12/13/2006 6:13 PM > > > > >-- > > >Version: 7.5.432 / Virus Database: 268.15.18/586 - Release >12/13/2006 6:13 PM -- Version: 7.5.432 / Virus Database: 268.15.20/588 - Release 12/15/2006 10:02 AM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 16, 2006 Report Share Posted December 16, 2006 Dear Maharaja, pundits, and prabhus, Please accept my humble obeisances. All glories to Srila Prabhupada. Full and easy agreement about "a" over "the," but a few questions & points: I don't find "as the" or "as a" quite clear. The phrasing and structure makes it sound as if it is the fervor rather than he who became a leader--or even further, that he is sort of convincing his fervor into taking the leading role. Maybe something like: "He came two or three times more to hear Siddhanta Sarasvati but subsequently channeled his reformist fervor when he took a leading role [became a leader] in the Indian independence movement." Or if you want to focus more on the channeling and fervor, end with those-- something like "He came two or three times more to hear Siddhanta Sarasvati but subsequently, as a leader of the Indian independence movement, was able to [found a way to] channel his reformist fervor. The comma after "Sarasvati" does help in showing the contrast, but if the focus is more on the subsequent channeling, it might not be needed in that sense. It is not required grammatically, and some readers/editors would question its use in this structure. Finally, and this is probably nit-picking even *more* unecessarily, and might lead to a prose that is less elegant, putting "more" right before "to hear" echoes the sense of "more to hear Siddhanta Sarasvati" [than to . . . ]. I realize that without a comma before it, the phrase cannot (or at least *should* not) be read like this, but "more to x than to y" is such a common expression that one might want to avoid joining the words when that is not the meaning, in order to keep the flow of reading without hesitation. It could also (again, less elegantly) be written, "He came two or three more times . . ." Please correct my misunderstanding of the rules and/or sentence's meaning, and please forgive my obsessive tendencies and especially my offenses. Thank you. Hare Krsna. Your servant, Bhakta Carl > >He came two or three times more to hear Siddhanta Sarasvati, but > >subsequently channeled his reformist fervor as a leader of the Indian > >independence movement. > > > >Is this sentence OK as it is? Or should it be as follows? > > > >He came two or three times more to hear Siddhanta Sarasvati, but > >subsequently channeled his reformist fervor into leading the Indian > >independence movement. > > > >The second version to me suggests that he was THE rather than A leader, > >which is incorrect. > > right. > > He came two or three times more to hear Siddhanta Sarasvati, but > subsequently channeled his reformist fervor into taking a leading role in > the Indian independence movement. > > Your servant, > Dravida dasa > > >-- > > > > > >Version: 7.5.432 / Virus Database: 268.15.18/586 - Release Date: > >12/13/2006 6:13 PM > > > > > > > > > >-- > > > > > >Version: 7.5.432 / Virus Database: 268.15.18/586 - Release Date: > >12/13/2006 6:13 PM > > > -- > > > Version: 7.5.432 / Virus Database: 268.15.20/588 - Release Date: > 12/15/2006 10:02 AM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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