suchandra Posted April 6, 2008 Report Share Posted April 6, 2008 Hopefully article by Caitanya dasa brahmacari which he send to mayapur.com will not be deleted. Interesting editorial policy at Mayapur.com I had sent my original letter which can be found here- http://sankirtandiary.blogspot.com/2008/03/letter-i-sent-to-mayapura-commission.html To see the edited version at Mayapur.com, go here: http://www.mayapur.com/main/?q=node/816 Interesting, they left out the following paragraphs: During the last few days of the festival, the announcements said that if we had any comments, suggestions, or concerns, to please email them to Mayapura to help next year’s festival be even better. I found everything to be perfect, so I cannot make any suggestions on how to improve. There was one small concern that I noticed while staying in Mayapura Dhama. I would occasionally notice men and women wearing karmi clothes, the men wearing shorts and pants, and the women wearing shorts, skirts, or pants. My first reaction was one of shock. How is it that they have chosen to dress in such an improper way here in India, especially in the holy dham? One other observation I had was that I would occasionally notice men and women, generally western born, mixing together in what many might call an improper fashion, embracing in public, flirting, kissing, etc. My first concern was that what kind of impression of ISKCON does this give to the many Indians who come to visit Sri Mayapura dhama? Indian culture is still quite conservative, and for visiting Indians to see some of the previously mentioned things might possibly cause them to develop a negative impression of ISKCON and the devotees. This also reflects on Srila Prabhupada’s transcendental reputation. Do the previous mentioned activities serve to glorify, or tarnish Srila Prabhupada’s reputation and glories? I mention all of these things out of a genuine concern for ISKCON and Srila Prabhupada’s reputation. I hope that it is not taken the wrong way. My motivation is one of love. My only suggestions would be to enforce a dress code on visiting devotees (foreign and Indian devotees who come to stay in Mayapura for the festival) and local devotee residents in Mayapura, i.e. men required to wear dhoti and kurta, and women required to wear sari with head-covering piece. Of course it would be impossible to enforce a dress code on the thousands of Indians who visit Mayapura, but it wouldn’t be such a difficult policy to enforce it at least on our own ISKCON devotees. The other suggestion would be to enforce strictly a behavior code in Mayapura dhama, at least during the festival times. For Indians to see western men and women associating with each other in public in quite crude ways might leave them with a bad impression of ISKCON, and devotees in general. On a positive notice, I wanted to say that most of the devotees that I came in contact with during the festival were quite nice and well behaved, but there were a few that might be lacking in the department of proper behavior and dress. (End of quoted letter) So when I say that there is a general tendency presently in ISKCON towards editing out (or simply ignoring those parts of sastra that you do not like), this might be another proof of evidence of that tendency. That someone can hack and slice my letter and delete the main part of it, and yet still ascribe my name to it, shows that we, as a society, might be headed towards very deep trouble. Or, as Krishna-kirti pointed out, his Guru Maharaja, Hrdyananda Goswami, in His Holiness's essay promoting the concept of gay marriage, quotes only one line of Srila Prabhupada's purport (he did not quote the next line, which strongly prohibited gay relationships). So this is the new standard. Think whatever you'd like, there are no absolutes, everything's open for our own completely twisted interpretation. Welcome to the new ISKCON. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
indulekhadasi Posted April 8, 2008 Report Share Posted April 8, 2008 Yes, in Kali yuga, everything is becoming corrupt. Even as much as 8 years ago there was such a big difference. I know because I remember the daily program for kids at the local ISKCON temple that I go to. 8 years ago things were very orderly. We had Guru puja and Tulsi puja (all done by the kids). We had a very good curriculum filled with a lot of important philosphy. Now, 8 years later, I am hearing complaints that the Sunday School isn't progressing. There is hardly any more philosophy. The Sunday School teachers are not making the curriculum age appropriate. Therefore many of the kids got bored, since they were not engaged enough. Now sometimes I pass rooms in that same temple, laughing and listening to real loud karmi music. What has ISKCON come to? (Mind you, I am not talking about all ISKCON centers). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KrishnasGirl Posted April 11, 2008 Report Share Posted April 11, 2008 This is true, I'm embarrased to say. I've seen the moms just chit-chatting while the kids just play during sunday school. When I first went to the temple I got the the impression of a day care instead of sunday school. The kids were super lound and rowdy in there! Don't know if it's still like that, since I haven't stopped by. I know some girls try to do things with the kids, like arts and crafts and sometimes they do plays. Yes, in Kali yuga, everything is becoming corrupt. Even as much as 8 years ago there was such a big difference. I know because I remember the daily program for kids at the local ISKCON temple that I go to. 8 years ago things were very orderly. We had Guru puja and Tulsi puja (all done by the kids). We had a very good curriculum filled with a lot of important philosphy. Now, 8 years later, I am hearing complaints that the Sunday School isn't progressing. There is hardly any more philosophy. The Sunday School teachers are not making the curriculum age appropriate. Therefore many of the kids got bored, since they were not engaged enough. Now sometimes I pass rooms in that same temple, laughing and listening to real loud karmi music. What has ISKCON come to?(Mind you, I am not talking about all ISKCON centers). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
indulekhadasi Posted April 13, 2008 Report Share Posted April 13, 2008 Playing is great, but at Sunday School the play should be centered around Krishna. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seamusjcarroll Posted April 17, 2008 Report Share Posted April 17, 2008 you are all so fortunate clearly spoken truth without judgment produces clarity of adulthood while still a child , now you must steal these last momements of childhood and take control of the movments heart flushing your purity through every aspect of prabhupadas instruction and set chaitanyas mesage free as you were born to do destiny call show us all the way perform dance sing heal paint all for krishna have a riot of beauty before you mature growing from within , to compete to please krishna with enjoyment as madhahurya rasa personel to you idividual eternal jiva atma paramatma in your original state full spirit form , you must now scream to reveal your love krishna chaitanya prabhupada guide you as rahda holds you as your favourite diety personality gently speaks to you we must we will triumph in prabhupadas name jai rahda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarva gattah Posted April 19, 2008 Report Share Posted April 19, 2008 Yes, in Kali yuga, everything is becoming corrupt. Even as much as 8 years ago there was such a big difference. I know because I remember the daily program for kids at the local ISKCON temple that I go to. 8 years ago things were very orderly. We had Guru puja and Tulsi puja (all done by the kids). We had a very good curriculum filled with a lot of important philosphy. Now, 8 years later, I am hearing complaints that the Sunday School isn't progressing. There is hardly any more philosophy. The Sunday School teachers are not making the curriculum age appropriate. Therefore many of the kids got bored, since they were not engaged enough. Now sometimes I pass rooms in that same temple, laughing and listening to real loud karmi music. What has ISKCON come to?(Mind you, I am not talking about all ISKCON centers). As the saying goes, peace like charity begins at home, it is easy for all of us to see fault but how can we, individually contribute? Somehow we have to get our own lives in order, chant 16 rounds following the Temple program and somehow, someway, be an example ourselves. Children will naturally imitate their parents and devotees around them, if they do not experience the higher taste of Krishna Consciousness through the wonderful pastimes in the Srimad Bhagavatam and devotees who are wonderful examples, then the modern technology of rap music, Myspace, Notebook (check out some of the kulis internet sites and how they dress up in ‘revealing’ karmi cloths), KARMI CLOTHING, TV, computer games etc. There is far too many kulis growing up and becoming Sunday guests at the Sunday feast although, as Hari Sauri once said, it is our first generation and it will take some generations to become purified and have children who seriously take Krishna Consciousness to heart instead of becoming another ‘Christian type’ Sunday religion to them who have grown up in ISKCON. Just for the record, Prabhupada disagreed with Hari Sauri Prabhu, saying it CAN be done in one generation but it appears all of us are way too attached to thinking we are these material bodies and its reputation (just in case anyone has forgotten, we are not the material body or mind. This is part of the Gita our second generation are finding very hard to understand. Maybe they do not want to understand?? Well I can understand why by being honest with myself??) If we can understand that we are not the material body we are in and stop exploiting the vessel we are presently trapped in, by continuosly trying to stimulate it in so many ways, then selfishly extending that impersonal self-abuse by using and exploiting those around us, when we are bored with abusing our own bodily vessels, then one can become the most amazing preacher for Prabhupada and Krishna This is what it means when a genuine devotee says “Peace like charity belongs at home” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suchandra Posted April 19, 2008 Author Report Share Posted April 19, 2008 Somehow we have to get our own lives in order............... Well, we have here hundreds, in fact all over Europe thousands of devotees who were cheated for 30 years again and again. As soon a Vaishnava leader fell down the next came who also fell down, and this went on and on till today. So at one point it is foolish to tell devotees first get your lives in order. First of all expose and stop a system of leadership which doesn't work in this advanced age of kali-yuga and set up a system which works without being worried about all the time. As soon you find a yatra which fully depends upon the integrity of one single leader be sure it is a corrupt system. Any sincere Vaishnava leader would never impose upon his followers this kind of unreasonable demand to spoil their whole lives in case he falls down, after having seen all these chaotic falldowns since 30 years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seamusjcarroll Posted April 19, 2008 Report Share Posted April 19, 2008 cheated or tricked , we are all vessels , take the brain , and then all your nerves , and then all your cappilaries , a trillion tings a second , that is a great trick , and then this gentle pull of gravity that keeps you pinned here surounded by magnectic field as we percieve , trick off soul on jiva, mind body and spirit cheating soul, as they three fight confused ,to be the boss, no soul is boss , spirit mind body refuse to accept , and are therefore cheated or tricked , krishna is the greatest rascal when it comes to such pranks , so isckon thirty years off learning , good all going to plan , remember its a hospital , now ????????????????? are you getting sicker or better or sicker before you get better , right now for me i feel very weak and tired , as i go deep inside , my childhood was full of terror , the closer i get to the sweet mellows that make me want to faint , i feel also the childs fear , this internal exsternal expirience rushing through , terror , my greatest terror now is to fail to feel these mellows full as death stands by as a frightened child crushed by life , in the madhahurya rasa ,my child slowly learns to play again , the fear slowly leaves , not afraid of life , but the opposite raging to life with joy my lessons learned ,now i enquire , off this moment only, with all that i am , with one question waiting for prabhupada to give the answer yes it is time to show what we have learned and now share this knowledge with the world all as one you one me one us all as one and different at the same , the truth is always known , but not always performed , perform always for krishna truth is your home ,and in the end you can not but speak the truth , your tunge like a sword cutting the curtain of illusion as you protect with hari katar in the present not just out of a book very personel confidential , as a mother to a child , we do not have to speculate , but only enquire of each other needs , and serve and share and serve all that we are to each other as prabhupada would be pleased jai rahda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suchandra Posted April 19, 2008 Author Report Share Posted April 19, 2008 cheated or tricked , we are all vessels , take the brain , and then all your nerves , and then all your cappilaries , a trillion tings a second , that is a great trick , and then this gentle pull of gravity that keeps you pinned here surounded by magnectic field as we percieve , trick off soul on jiva, mind body and spirit cheating soul, as they three fight confused ,to be the boss, no soul is boss , spirit mind body refuse to accept , and are therefore cheated or tricked , krishna is the greatest rascal when it comes to such pranks , so isckon thirty years off learning , good all going to plan , remember its a hospital , now ????????????????? are you getting sicker or better or sicker before you get better , right now for me i feel very weak and tired , as i go deep inside , my childhood was full of terror , the closer i get to the sweet mellows that make me want to faint , i feel also the childs fear , this internal exsternal expirience rushing through , terror , my greatest terror now is to fail to feel these mellows full as death stands by as a frightened child crushed by life , in the madhahurya rasa ,my child slowly learns to play again , the fear slowly leaves , not afraid of life , but the opposite raging to life with joy my lessons learned ,now i enquire , off this moment only, with all that i am , with one question waiting for prabhupada to give the answer yes it is time to show what we have learnedand now share this knowledge with the world all as one you one me one us all as one and different at the same , the truth is always known , but not always performed , perform always for krishna truth is your home ,and in the end you can not but speak the truth , your tunge like a sword cutting the curtain of illusion as you protect with hari katar in the present not just out of a book very personel confidential , as a mother to a child , we do not have to speculate , but only enquire of each other needs , and serve and share and serve all that we are to each other as prabhupada would be pleased jai rahda Thanks Seamusjcarroll for saying this, reminds me when Prabhupada once explained why at first he didn't want to go with his friend to meet his spiritual master Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Maharaja. Prabhupada said, he saw so many so called saints, who were invited for lunch by his father, that he didn't want to go and meet yet another of this kind of saints. Why things should have changed? Could be that this is what we also have right now. Pure devotees are after all, and even Krishna Himself says it - very, very rare. And as Jagadbandhu dasa below points out, "Meanwhile the masses continue to suffer immensely because of the callous indifference of the rubber-stamped "saints" who continue to thrive as the current incumbents of the cult of personality." Above the Law BY: JAGABANDHU DASA Apr 18, FORT WHITE, FLORIDA (SUN) — How many "heroes of renunciation" have abandoned their families because of the "inconvenient" burden of the consequences of their own sensory confluence with other souls and subsequent offspring? They go on to "glory" while their families are often left to severe struggles for mere subsistence. Too irresponsible and "transcendental" to be a real father? Never mind then. It's easier to become a "saint" and leave your progeny as virtual wards of the state. And leave a trail of unwanted children behind your "glorious" path to "perfection." No doubt going to work at a job you maybe can't stand lacks glamour and may seem mundane as you toil away the days to support the family you created. Don't like the troublesome toil of work? Hate to work with "karmis?" Awww. That's tough. Too bad. So what. Get over it and on with your domestic responsibilities. And a real life. People want to talk about spiritual life. And "spiritual leadership." As if. Makes you want to puke. Otherwise it would make the blood of all good real people of substance come to a roaring boil with flaming eyes and steaming smoke geysering from the ears. Sounds angry? You betcha! As Gabby Hayes would say, yer dern tootin!' Or as once observed by Woody Allen, "If Christ could see what people were doing in his name, he'd never stop throwing up." Recently, I had a septic problem and "..it" was backing up into the house. I realized that the word "septic" was a good euphemism for when someone was full of..., well you know. Figuratively speaking it would appear that many souls have a "septic" problem because they're full of "..it." & "..it's backin' up into the "House" that everyone could supposedly dwell within. And the World reeks from the stench of what is generally known as "bull..it." Oh that's right, only the false leaders are to blame. Never mind about the false followers who have spent most of their adult lives cheating and deceiving the general public for their livelihood doing the "pick" because they're so wonderfully above the laws of both God and man because of their automatic, inherent "spiritual" superiority thinking that because they're "devotees" they can do as they please without any culpability for their completely deceitful transactions with the common people who now are therefore easily capable to completely marginalize an entire spiritual movement which has largely become an exclusive country club for the privileged few (by comparison) and their sycophants. What I'd like to know is how did bulls become stigmatized by association with what it is by definition "humanure"? Please consider that the "humanure" problem has been the world's only problem since the beginning of time. As the famous iconoclast Popeye might say, " I've had all I can stands and I can't stands no more." How about you? Is there anyone else out there? Or is everyone happily, comfortably numb by their own illusory status quo while supported by extensive deceptions and multifarious "devotional" chicaneries ostensibly manifest as real devotion merely because of their own alleged "spiritual" superiority above the "meat-eating, demon karmis." Meanwhile the masses continue to suffer immensely because of the callous indifference of the rubber-stamped "saints" who continue to thrive as the current incumbents of the cult of personality. And people wonder why the Hare Krishna movement is shrinking in America, with temples largely "Hinduized" or secularized in spite of widespread abandonment by the original sincere seekers. How lovely. Or is it "transcendental?" You're all souls. What do you think? How can the Supreme Lord or his real followers be truly pleased by such nonsense masquerading as genuine spirituality hopefully directed towards the ultimate fulfillment of aspirant Divine Love? 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Sarva gattah Posted April 19, 2008 Report Share Posted April 19, 2008 . So at one point it is foolish to tell devotees first get your lives in order. First of all expose and stop a system of leadership which doesn't work in this advanced age of kali-yuga and set up a system which works without being worried about all the time. As soon you find a yatra which fully depends upon the integrity of one single leader be sure it is a corrupt system. Any sincere Vaishnava leader would never impose upon his followers this kind of unreasonable demand to spoil their whole lives in case he falls down, after having seen all these chaotic falldowns since 30 years. Very well said Suchandra I know what you mean It begins with you and me Prabhu, if we can heal our own faults. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seamusjcarroll Posted April 20, 2008 Report Share Posted April 20, 2008 painfull points ,i suffered this life to as a child , a terrible bruise opon your soul , i believe now all this was to wake up my soul , the keeper of the key crushed the beast into submission with terror , terror as a child causes savere mental and emotional and sexual problems , my heart goes out to all ,these expiriences are corrosive for the being , without prabhupada i would not be alive, this i know , if i had not suffered enough , my suffering continues but changes separation remains from a true sence of self to just know what to do , the more i live the more simple it becomes , speak the truth and forget consequence and encourage everyone to do the same in the end all the truth comes out good and bad good reactions and bad reactions mixed reactions truth spoke , when this happens in your life , usualy everything breaks , as the truth reveals a huge weight goes and a long wait can come but in the end the bones of the past are exumed from hearts and minds and deeds a shocking mess that all detest let the truth be known , a terrible shock of horror went through me as a child i nearly died as a grown man i tried to die , but prabhupada wispered in my ear and said you are mine , my inner darkness laughed , and now at age 47 i feel almost free from the past ,the deepest bits are still hidden and the crime not revealed , , in kali yuge golden age has begun 10,000 years demons who reveal there sins have a chance to go home , those who conceal there sins will suffer terrible karmic dept and may never come home , to sell your soul , no only a fool would do such a thing , all devotees must come clean , and then be given the love and support to overcome the sins delt and felt , not an easy task for an abused , extra special protection and help is needed , isckon must stand taller than all the other religions and face these children with love devine love as we learn and teach how we heal how to heal we teach the whole world how to heal , this has been our mission so far , to learn for the world , kept in separation , as we suffered these lives at prabhupadas feet now in prabhupadas name teach tell the truth hear listen here speak do as prahupada would wish us to set the demons free set isckon free this is the destiny of our time people recover and then speak the truth , bones are already jumping out of the ground in other quaters , this will also be isckon fate , some will repent before its to late , krishna is very infectious , kali is deadly , i would rather an infection than my head cut of , as a child my neck was streched until i feel unconcious , thats when kali struck at me ,near dead my head did fall of , my life shattered by trauma , only prabhupadas mercy helped me, for myself i have been worthless and driven by so many demons, child terror being the worst demon of all , oh krishna hold my soul away from such blows and when im able as you desire fuse my soul to these bones help me stand up help me mend this beast this child healed to soul , no more fear is my desire ,my mind is clear , but a trace tremor of terror still rushes through i pray that krishna will absorb this terror away , and to wake one morning ready and new and prabhupada to serve , and be a servant to all , a friend to all , so much has been learnt now we must put this great talent to work on our selves and prabhupadas movement will rise as ajuna would free from illusion as many die and fall you me all perish from here before you do speak your truth as you heaal jai rahda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarva gattah Posted April 20, 2008 Report Share Posted April 20, 2008 Quote: <TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=6 width="100%" border=0><TBODY><TR><TD style="BORDER-RIGHT: #666666 1px solid; PADDING-RIGHT: 3ex; BORDER-TOP: #666666 1px solid; PADDING-LEFT: 3ex; BORDER-LEFT: #666666 1px solid; BORDER-BOTTOM: #666666 1px solid" bgColor=#e0e0e0>Originally Posted by seamusjcarroll Painful points, i suffered this life too as a child, a terrible bruise upon your soul, I believe now all this was to wake up my soul, The keeper of the key crushed the beast into submission with terror, terror as a child causes severe mental and emotional and sexual problems. My heart goes out to all, these experiences are corrosive for the being, without Prabhupada I would not be alive, this I know, if I had not suffered enough, My suffering continues but changes separation remains from a true sense of self to just know what to do, the more I live the simpler it becomes, Speak the truth and forget consequence and encourage everyone to do the same, in the end all the truth comes out good and bad good reactions and bad reactions mixed reactions truth spoke, when this happens in your life, usually everything breaks, As the truth reveals a huge weight goes and a long wait can come but in the end the bones of the past are exhumed from hearts and minds and deeds, A shocking mess that all detest let the truth be known, a terrible shock of horror went through me as a child I nearly died as a grown man I tried to die, But Prabhupada whispered in my ear and said you are mine, my inner darkness laughed, and now at age 47 I feel almost free from the past, The deepest bits are still hidden and the crime not revealed, in kali yuga golden age has begun 10,000 years demons who reveal there sins have a chance to go home, those who conceal there sins will suffer terrible karmic dept and may never come home for a long, long time, To sell your soul, only a fool would do such a thing, all devotees must come clean, and then be given the love and support to overcome the sins dealt and felt, not an easy task for an abused, Extra special protection and help is needed, isckon must stand taller than all the other religions and face these children with love, divine love as we learn and teach how we heal, how to heal we teach the whole world how to heal, This has been our mission so far, to learn for the world, kept in separation, as we suffered these lives at Prabhupada’s feet now in Prabhupada’s name teach tell the truth, hear listen here speak, Do as Prabhupada would wish us to set the demons free set isckon free this is the destiny of our time people recover and then speak the truth, Bones are already jumping out of the ground in other quarters, this will also be isckon fate, some will repent before it’s to late, and Krishna is very infectious, Kali is deadly; I would rather an infection than my head cut of, as a child my neck was stretched until I fell unconscious, That’s when kali struck at me, near dead my head did fall off, my life shattered by trauma, only Prabhupada’s mercy helped me, For myself I have been worthless and driven by so many demons, child terror being the worst demon of all, Oh Krishna hold my soul away from such blows and when I‘m able as you desire fuse my soul to these bones help me stand up, help me mend this beast, this child healed to soul, No more fear is my desire, my mind is clear, but a trace tremor of terror still rushes through I pray that Krishna will absorb this terror away, And to wake one morning ready and new and Prabhupada to serve, and be a servant to all, a friend to all, So much has been learnt now we must put this great talent to work on our selves and Prabhupada’s movement will rise as Arjuna would, Free from illusion as many die and fall you me all perish from here before you do speak your truth as you heal jai Radha </TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE> <!-- END TEMPLATE: bbcode_quote -->Very sincere and heart moving experience and the realizations you have had, thank you for sharing this humble presentation Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seamusjcarroll Posted April 21, 2008 Report Share Posted April 21, 2008 thank you for tidying up my post , i read , and read , to hear if there is a growing mood ,these demons that seem to run the show , will not succeed , from poison and lies , no love wiil defeat them all, truth already cuts into there souls , same for the rest , we all know our sins and you can not hide , these so called gurus , leaving children to play saint , is very childish , and there followers as you say psychophantics , surely they are not all stupid , next life , the guru becomes a dog and his fanatic diciples become blood sucking worms , to think and die with falsehood , while so close to prabhupada , these people are evil , and ruled by demons , while others are caught in the web and trapped by fear and confusion , not knowing what to do , this is there plan , devide and rule ,prabhupada knew about these demonic forces around him , and maybe they did kill his body , but they can not kill his movement or the philosophy, even though they change it to suit themselves , true devottees never lie and follow the guru without deviation, these rascals demand the same adoration while behaving like pigs , while they lie all the time , again are they all stupid arrogant fools, wiiling to loose this oportunity to go back to godhead ,,,the saddest thing , these people do not believe in krishna , they deep down have no devotion or love ,and serve only themselves , dogs and pigs dressed as devotees , OH NO APARAHDAAAAAAAAAAA and now a thunderbolt is going to kill me , stupid stupid , this is how they keep the truth hidden,,, durga will chop there heads as we all speak the truth jai rahda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seamusjcarroll Posted April 21, 2008 Report Share Posted April 21, 2008 kama yoga of a sudra this terrible reality , being seprarated from children , i have three children , i no longer live withh , i left these relationships to persue my spiritual journey , my early life creating an entangled nightmare right up to this day ,at the time just before leaving my children , i got a call from one of my brothers, he told me that 2 clairvoyants had told him that my life was going to change , and that i was going to speak the truth , this had already begun , before this call .i remember taking a shower , screaming and crying at prabhupada and krishna banging my head on the wall for it not to be true , this is when i accepted what may happen , my sweet beutiful children , one boy 8 one girl 10 vrinda and syamsunder , this broke my heart , as this burden came opon my soul , i started having terrible flash backs of terror and abandoment , i saw my own brutalised child screaming from the depths , i begged like a demented crazed person , to krishna , to not have to face my child fears , and that he just heal me , in the end i took an overdose , when my mothers dieying face passed through my mind , i was 4 and half yeras old when she took her life , this memory was completly hidden from me , her face , let alone the horrors of the childrens home , spiritual journeys and life journeys one in and one out , one out one in , like breathing or sucking poison more like , jai prabhupada , this philosophy cuts to the very core until all is revealed and restored to krishna at prabhupadas feet , process is life ,bahkti is the process of love that brings life , i stand blooded and scared , and others have suffered as a result , but my heart is aflame ,and oh it hurts , for instruction , to burst prabhupada jai Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pretender Posted May 2, 2008 Report Share Posted May 2, 2008 Can you not again even now return your support to the children you once abandoned? Humbly with Affection, Jagabandhu dasa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amlesh Posted May 2, 2008 Report Share Posted May 2, 2008 Hmmm... the Eternal problem of understanding the Real meaning of Renunciation or the search for spiritual understanding... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
indulekhadasi Posted May 3, 2008 Report Share Posted May 3, 2008 Sarva Gattah prabhuji, I do try to help in my individual way. Recently the kids told me they wanted to be involved in doing a play, so I wrote and choreographed a play. I met a lot of opposition but the kids enjoyed doing it, and their conciousness was engaged in a higher way. Thank you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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