santoshask Posted March 25, 2009 Report Share Posted March 25, 2009 Guruji, I was born on 20th Nov 1974 1.08am in Bangalore. I gor married on Feb 27 2007 with a girl who was born on 23rd May 1975 not sure of time but born in Bangalore. From the day of marriage I am fed up with the attitude of my in-laws including my wife's. My wife does not have any sort of respect to me or my parents. She does not listen to what I say. She gives more importance to her family and their family members does not want to let her go. My wife conceived in 2006 and we lost the baby in Jan 2007 due to her ill health. She put on weight and did not want to exercise. I had warned her couple of times and she continued to be lazy. After couple of months she conceived again and a baby girl was born prematurely with health problems. Even after 1 yr my baby's neck is not erect and she does not recognize any one. I supported her emotionally but she does not care about me. After 7 months of stay in her parents house, I had asked her to either come to US or stay in my parents house as they live alone and are old. She wants to continue staying in her Parents house even after warning her that I would divorce. I'm fed up of all these issues and have decided to divorce her. I'm a software engineer working in USA for a reputed firm and I'm tall & handsome too. She is obese and ugly but still she shows attitude towards me. I do not understand whats wrong with her. Her parents also support her and not sending her to my home. They are planning to file a dowry case against me if I divorce her. This is my short story and I would like to know what would happen to my married life. I really want a good wife who would take care of me and my parents and I will give all my love to her. Please suggest me what I should be doing in such a situation. Eagerly waiting for you response. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mylilangel Posted March 25, 2009 Report Share Posted March 25, 2009 Dear Santosh, With all due sympathy for the situation you are in, I think you need to have bit more understanding for your wife. For what I understand from your post is that with your baby's condition and your parents being old, as you said, I am not surprised that your wife declines to go to your parent's house in your absence. As a boy, it may not be possible for you to understand her own needs in this situation. And trust me, I am not patronising. My own son has been through this similar condition but thankfully my husband was with me 24 hrs 7 days a week which made great lot difference to the care and attention my son and I received. I am sure here your wife is right in not going there, sply since you are not there. and obviously if she goes to live with your parents, apart from being a single parent for a difficult child she will have to take up the home responsibilities as well. I would have had a completely different view if she had declined to join you in USA:smash: And then as far as looks are concerned, my dear I hope you only said that out of frustration and you didn't mean it. Cause as a female I can tell you that its the most Male Chauvinistic Statement anyone can ever say and that too for his wife he married on his will. If you want a wife who should live under the complex of her husband's good looks, should look after a physically (and mentally) challenged child along with taking care of her in-laws in the absence of her husband with noone to bother about her (not forgetting the husband living miles away doing all the lip-service he can!!!), I would happily advice your wife to get rid of you and look forward in life... Best and regards Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kirandeep Posted March 25, 2009 Report Share Posted March 25, 2009 hi give the birth time of ur wife. im learning astrology and not an expert...but i am sure those who are expert will surely help u. i read ur problem and can understand how much u r facing. i dont know why i am feeling like to give u one suggestion (cant giv advice cz im younger to you). there is one saying ' jab tak koi cheez hamare paas hoti h to hum ooski kadar nahin karte, jab wo dur chale jaati h to hame ooski kimat pata lagti hai. you might have experienced this in your life. you can try one thing- just be silent and dont say anything to wife (doesnt matter how much rude she is) , try for 2months.. with patience..be introvert and calm. and besides this whenever u talk to her or her family members..record the conversation...specially when they threaten to file a case against u (i am saying this so u should be alert and prepared in advance). u ll get astrological advice also but still try last time to make your relationship work....if it doesnt,take divorce.. you have one life....(i dont belive in god so will not say god has given u one life untill god itself comes 2me and say i have given life to everyone..he he he) ...u hv every ri8 to live happily by fulfilling ur all wishes.. good luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coolgimmy Posted March 26, 2009 Report Share Posted March 26, 2009 Mr.Santosh, It seems that you have expectations of a caretaker for your old parents from your wife rather than a spouse. In that case its good she is staying with her parents, looking after the child instead of moving to your old parents. Why not appoint a caretaker for them and then ask your wife to move to your parents house. Its really ridiculous that you marry and then think that you made a wrong choice and think yourself to be handsome and decide to divorce her. In case you marry second time also you will not be happy with her, so be contented with whatever you have. Nowadays, divorce is a common affair and your threats is not going to create any impact. Even if you divorce her your second association is also subject to seperation only. Regards. Coolgimmy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sasisekaran_pti Posted March 26, 2009 Report Share Posted March 26, 2009 Aum Gurubhyo Namah Namaste Dear Shir.Santosh You are running Rahu dasa and mars antar. Mars is placed in 7th, from "UL", a place of marriage. It troubles the married life. This period started in july 2008 and will end in july 2009. Your moon sravana , is also under bad influence of Rahu passing over it and saturn , tranisting the 8th from it. No wonder , you are being subjected to such unpleasant events. Try to hold till saturn and rahu leave the grip on your mind. A little before this time, Jupiter dasa starts - in july 2009. Wisdom will set in and you will be in a better position to decide on the future course of action. At this juncture, it is not good to ditch your wife. Otherwise, you will only be commiting a sin. may mother bless all sasisekaran. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
santoshask Posted March 26, 2009 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2009 Thanks Sasisekaran, I would be calm and patient till July 2009. mylilangel & Coolgimmy has adviced my wife to get seperated by me. That is what I also want and if that happens it would be good riddance. It is our culture for the father-in-law to discuss with my parents & me to convince us on why she needs to stay in their house instead they have not even bothered to call me or my parents from the day we got seperated about 6 months back. This shows the ego & pride they have towards us. The issues are very complex to explain than what I have entered while starting the thread. Anyways, I wanted to know the star positions and the effect due to their movement on my married life which Mr. Sasisekaran has provided. Thanks a bunch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mylilangel Posted March 27, 2009 Report Share Posted March 27, 2009 Hi Santosh, I am very sorry that I did not understand your hurt pride since your father-in-law did not come begging for her daughter's life in front of you and your parents. I am shocked and surprised that people like you exist in our generation too. I have always felt proud of the husband's in our generation for being much more caring and understanding than in our parent's generation!!! But well well you certainly proved me wrong there. All ther very best to your wife and if you noticed even Respected Sasikeran ji said that it would be a "sin" to divorce your wife at this stage. But it seems your pride only made you read what was only convenient for you:( best and regards Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anIndian Posted March 27, 2009 Report Share Posted March 27, 2009 No pandit, no grah can help you till you think she's obese and ugly. Its your own duty to fulfil all the needs that are needed by a happy married couple. That includes care, love without expectations and above all TIME. No one is perfect in the world Santosh, think again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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