Can a hindu boy get married with a catholic girl if he has to do ganesh chaturti ?

[arjun2826]

Hi,

Can a hindu boy get married with a catholic girl as he is the only one son and has to do ganesh chaturti in India for the coming years ?

 

Social pressure (his parents) seems to say it is impossible in the religious point of view : Because his wife has a different faith and she is white, he will never be allowed to perpetuate this ritual and even others (for example cremation).

 

Is this restriction written in the Veda or somewhere else or is it only racism ?

[sant]

 

has to do ganesh chaturti in India for the coming years ?

 

What does ganesh chaturthi have to do with his wife.

 

 

 

Social pressure (his parents) seems to say it is impossible in the religious point of view : Because his wife has a different faith and she is white, he will never be allowed to perpetuate this ritual and even others (for example cremation).

 

You asked if they can marry but here you say he is married.

Anyway must be a printing mistake.

[arjun2826]

His parents say that if he get married with her, he won't be able to do ganesh chaturti because both, husband and wife, has to do it.

And if she is catholic she doesn't have right to practice it.

 

yes it was a printing mistake. It is is "girlfriend".

[sant]

So nothing ive ever read off.

The rituals and pooja you do on ganesh chaturthi example idol carrying putting them in a river etc ive never heard of them in any scripture.

ive just heard about a fast to be done to please the lord.

So im sure there there is nothing of such as white man or muslim not doing pooja valid here.Anyone who wants to please the lord does it.

 

They are just making stupid excuses.You ask them to state which scripture they are saying this from even i will hear .

 

 

 

Is this restriction written in the Veda or somewhere else or is it only racism ?

The vedas no such thing is wtritten.Ganesh chaturthi festival is even vedik you ask them to prove that..

[arjun2826]

That is what i think too.

But you know, people in India sometimes during ganesh chaturti festival refuse to do arti in the house of a couple where wife is of another faith.

And this is truth I saw it. But in my opinion they are wrong.

So his parent apprehend that if he get married, he will be excluded and that he won't be able to perpetuate ganesh festival.

These parents didn't read it from any scripture, they only anticipate social reaction and criticizes.

What to do ?

[sant]

Some so called customs and rituals etc are followed only because ones Father grandfather etc have done a certain thing in some way so we must also do.This is the so called custom.In our family our father used to do pooja first in pooja room,or he used to eat food first and all that .this is it .

Remember the movie of karan johar where amitabh bachan the father did not let his son marry the heroine saying it is our custom in the family etc bla bla bla.it was just ego because she was poor mans daughter.Or remember the reason when he sent young brother of son to the hostel saying it is our family tradition my grandfather went father went etc.

no custom only stupid ego, superstition lack of clarity in thinking.

[sant]

 

What to do ?

First ask his parents on what basis they are saying all this.

Tell them do they face south and sleep,do they keep vrat on eevery sunday,do they eat food after 7pm,do they avoid the sunrise and sunset,do they avoid seeing others naked body,do they get up at 4 in the morning as mentioned in the ganesh puraan,

Ok ill tell something from ganesh purana since they are so worried about ganesh chaturthi.Ask them if they follow this fully

 

 

 

Somakanta said, One should rise three hours before dawn. Sitting in a clean place one should meditate on his guru. Then one should meditate upon Mother Earth and ask her to patiently accept the touch of thy feet upon her. Then having meditated upon one's personal loving God, one should first offer prostrations and recite the following prayers.

 

"At sunrise I offer my humble supplication to Lord Gananatha, who is the cause of this manifestation, who awards boons to the demigods such as Brahma and others, who abounds in the Agamas, who awards the results of the activities of dharma, artha, and kama, who is the cause of liberation for the human race, who is beyond words, who is the beginning, and who has unlimited appearances."

 

"At sunrise I offer my humble supplication to Lord Shiva, the husband of goddess Parvati, who carries the moon on his head, who is dresses in a tiger-skin, who is pitiless toward mind-born lust, who awards boons to Visnu and Indra, who is loved by the demigods and perfected beings, who carries the damaru drum and trident, who wears a garland of snakes, and who is Puru's enemy."

 

"At sunrise I offer my humble supplication to Lord Visnu, the husband of goddess Laksmi, who possesses great strength, who manifests unlimited incarnations for the protection of the divine souls, who dwells in the ocean of milk, who is the controller of the demigods, who is the Supreme Lord - dispeller of darkness, who defeats all of his enemies and is also the cause of their liberation."

 

"At sunrise I offer my humble supplication to the Sun, Lord of Light, who removes sins, who removes darkness, who is praised by divine beings, who is the three Vedas, who by means of illusion expelled the enemies of the demigods, and who is the cause of spiritual knowledge."

 

"At sunrise I offer my humble supplication to Goddess Parvati, daughter of the Himalayas, who creates prosperity, who saves those who are drowning in the ocean of material existence, who possesses three eyes, who is the cause of the creation of matter, who by means of illusion expelled the enemies of the demigods, who is illusion personified, who is praised by the great sages and demigods and who is known as Suresi."

 

After one has meditated on other demigods and sages in the same way and worshipped them in one's mind, he should pray to them for forbearance. Then taking a water-pot, one should walk in a southwesterly direction from the village. One should also take along clay (white for a Brahmin, red for a Ksatriya, and black for a Vaisya or Sudra). One should never take clay from a riverbank nor an anthill or from the house of a brahmin. After one has covered the ground with grass he should pass stool and urine whilst facing the north or south. Whether it is day or night, having first cleaned one's behind with grass or soft wood, one should wash there five times with clay and water. Then immediately after, one should wash the left hand ten times and both hands seven times. The genitals should be washed once and left hand three more times. After one has passed only urine, both hands and feet should be washed twice. For a householder it is prescribed that this should be done at least one time, but for one who is practicing austerities - twice, and for a sanyasin - four times. For purification, (both day and night) a woman or a sudra should do at least one-eighth of the latter.

After sipping some water and taking a piece of wood from the milk or thorn tree, one should clean his teeth and tongue. And thus praying, "O Lord Krsna, please give me strength, power, glory, energy, cows, intelligence, wisdom and knowledge of Brahman." Then having taken one's bath in cool water, one should perform the samdya worship with prayers and benedictions for his immediate family. Then one should offer libations to the ancestors and demigods, and practice the recitation of the Vedas. Finally one should perform worship to one's personal loving God. One should then offer food to the demigods, deities and guests under the guidance of the Brahmins. One should also listen to the recitation of the Puranas, give gifts in charity and avoid criticizing others. With loving words, energy and wealth, one should be very generous to others and never hurt anyone's feelings or engage in self-praise. One should always be faithful and respectful towards one's guru nor be offensive toward the Vedas. Nor should one engage in heresy or associate with irreligious people nor eat unclean foods like meat, fish or eggs or have sexual relations with a married woman. Nor should one avoid one's wife, but approach her at the right time for sexual relations. One should always respect and act dutifully towards one's mother and father, guru and the cows. One should give food and clothes to the weak, blind and poor. And most importantly, always be truthful in speech and honest in all of one's dealings.

 

These are things which one can do for their own benefit as it is a kind of penance but even this has no relation to the conditions his family impose as they are done out of superstitions and this is something good.

[arjun2826]

Thanks for your quick answers

It helps me to understand more about hindu religion (that I don't know at all), their true rituals and separate them of the parents' saying.

Could you please tell me from where does this litterature comes : Somakanta said, [...] of one's dealings.

 

I like when you say that it has no link with superstition, because in the case of his parents, they are very superstitious : If he doesn't do ganesh chaturti, "he will never be happy and satisfied with life and God will punish him".

I think that all hindu ritual have a sense. This sense is often forgotten in some low educated places in india. The consequence is that people do these rituals because if they don't, they think something bad will happened. It is superstition more than religion or faith.

For example I have heard that during ganesh chaturti, you have to throw some water downstair before eating on a leaf downstair.

This is due to the fact that before, in old houses, if you eat downstair on a leaf, sometimes, hunts could come on your leaf.

To avoid that, people used to throw some water all around the leaf.

Today all people do not know the reason of throwing water, but they still

practice only because if they don't, they think they will get punished by god. This is a non sense.

I am looking for a book that would explain the reason of rituals so that to stop some superstitions.

[sant]

Internet provides many literature about festivals etc.

You can buy books also.

What exactly do you want to know.

 

 

i gave you what is from here

http://members.sti.net/deva/ganesha1.html

[arjun2826]

I need to know the meaning of some hindu rituals to understand why we do it and what is the benefit of it?

(for example the ritual of throwing water downstair and the benefits of it)

My aim is to show his parents that there is a reason for each ritual. And if we don't do some of them (for example throwing water) god won't punish us.

And I would say them that, as you said, it is written nowhere that is is forbidden to get marry with a catholic, it is only question of ego, it is only a lie.

[arjun2826]

I don't think his parent are bad. I think they are victim of social pressure, of ego consequentely and of superstition.

I am trying to fight superstition because it is a shame.

Clever people found some rituals with a sense and a benefits at old time.

Today, some people forgot the reason of this ritual and still practice them in the case if god punish them if they don't do it.

[sant]

 

And I would say them that, as you said, it is written nowhere that is is forbidden to get marry with a catholic, it is only question of ego, it is only a lie.

Yes

Its not a sin.

But be careful there are some obscure refernces where it might be written best type of marriage is Is to marry a person from same caste and all that but you dont worry.Nowhere i have read it is a sin.nowhere will you find also.

 

 

I need to know the meaning of some hindu rituals to understand why we do it and what is the benefit of it?

(for example the ritual of throwing water downstair and the benefits of it)

 

good im learning one ritual from you.Now where did you get this from.

Throwing water downstairs.

Any ways if you want to know about vaastu then all that is related to having good energy vibrations and bad energy vibrations in the house.

There are some doshes you get due to vaastu any way if you want to know then switch on the tv to watch astha at 11.20 now.baba gives knowledge on such things also.

[arjun2826]

Thanks for your advice concerning tv program.

But I don't live in India.

I go there twice a year and often for ganesh with the boy (my eldest brother) in love of the catholic girl.

I am trying to find solution to help him and parents.

 

This ritual (throwing water) was taught to me by an indian man who work in a temple in india the whole day.

[sant]

 

Thanks for your advice concerning tv program.

But I don't live in India.

I go there twice a year and often for ganesh with the boy (my eldest brother) in love of the catholic girl.

I am trying to find solution to help him and parents.

 

This ritual (throwing water) was taught to me by an indian man who work in a temple in india the whole day.

 

 

Thanks

ohh so do you live anywhere near the indian subcontinent.

Anyway i dont understand if you dont even live in india on what basis does your family (im sorry for harsh words used earlier) even say such a thing.

Shouldnt they live in india and payback the debts towards the country rashtra dharm is considered the highest.What about that.

What about eating food prepared by christians.what about fastfood,clothes etc.I remember another case here.go through this here http://www.indiadivine.org/audarya/spiritual-discussions/452900-gandharva-marriage.html

[arjun2826]

Hi sant,

 

ohh so do you live anywhere near the indian subcontinent.

Yes I am living abroad. That's the reason why I do not know all the hindu rituals as we don't pratice them overhere, I do not understand the meaning of them, and as I never made some of them, I don't feel the need of practicing them once I am in India.

And if I do them, I like to know the reason of it. But my family in India don't allways know the meaning of them. They only do it because everybody does and they think that if they don't, bad luck and unhappiness will hit them. It is the same for my brother.

Shouldnt they live in india and payback the debts towards the country rashtra dharm is considered the highest.What about that.

 

Because of the distance, my brother felt in love with a white catholic and not with an indian girl. Overhere, we expect love marriage and not arranged marriage, which is a shame for our parents.

As we don't know all hindu rituals and meanings, could you please tell me what is rashtra dharm ?

What about eating food prepared by christians.what about fastfood,clothes etc.I remember another case here.

Well our parents have been to fastfood, never eat christians food (pig our cow) and try to respect hindu rules as best as they can. They weare normal clothes.

 

Could you please tell me what is vaastu ?

[sant]

 

Shouldnt they live in india and payback the debts towards the country rashtra dharm is considered the highest.What about that.

 

Because of the distance, my brother felt in love with a white catholic and not with an indian girl. Overhere, we expect love marriage and not arranged marriage, which is a shame for our parents.

As we don't know all hindu rituals and meanings, could you please tell me what is rashtra dharm ?

 

What about eating food prepared by christians.what about fastfood,clothes etc.I remember another case here.

 

Well our parents have been to fastfood, never eat christians food (pig our cow) and try to respect hindu rules as best as they can. They weare normal clothes.

 

Could you please tell me what is vaastu ?

 

I was just adding on some things to say to your parents.

Ok so they live in india i thought they lived abroad with you.

Rashtra dharm is duty towards the nation.

I said it in a sarcastic way nothing else.Just a add on.

Clothes etc they wear what they want im just saying it.Ithese things such as not to wear clothes, etc etc are just like the excuses your parents are making in not letting your brother marry.I meant that if they are so strict about such silly things then they should follow all these things also.i hope you understood.

[arjun2826]

yes Sant, I understood what you meant

Actually, they live overhere with us.

So now I am trying to find arguments to prove them that hindu religion never forbidden this kind of marriage. And it is quite difficult.

[sant]

Youre wrong ask them to find where it is forbidden

[arjun2826]

We already asked them, but they say they have more experience than us.

Everything is difficult in this story : choosing between love for his parent and love for his girlfriend, tradition or freedom ..

[sant]

 

We already asked them, but they say they have more experience than us.

 

You ask them the main reason of not allowing the marriage im thinking it can be something else.

[arjun2826]

They say it will bring bad luck and unhappiness on our family if we stop doing ganesha chaturti.

[sant]

 

They say it will bring bad luck and unhappiness on our family if we stop doing ganesha chaturti.

 

 

 

 

SO how are you not doing ganesh chaturthi.You are still doing it arent you.Before your brother was doing it wasnt he.Was he married then, no he wasnt so what is the wife doing.are they scared taht the wife will stop yor brother from doing it.

One more thing when you go to india how do you do ganesh chaturthi

[empy]

I am sorry for the intrusion.

 

you people conveniently kept arguing that it is superstition,, no where it is written etc...

 

When the vedas were brought into written form, even then Christianity was not born, hence you don't find any mention about catholics and so on in the vedas.

 

If some body wants to marry some onefrom another religion, it is legal. go ahead.

Don't take shelter under the guise that it is not writtten in the vedas.

 

Manu dharma sastra is for Hindus only. Inter religious marriages were not dealt, by Manu.

 

Yes, Your parents(his) are right. They are not superstitious. If the final rites like cremation are to be as per sastra, a person of a different faith should not do it. It is not as per Dharma. So choose between the girl, and hinduism.

You can't have both.I mean you can't practice both religions.

[arjun2826]

we are still doing it. But if he get married he won't be able to do it because - people in India will criticize

- his wife won't be able to do all the dish necessary for ganesha

This will lead to the end of ganesh chaturti for us, so it will end to unhappiness and destroy of our family ..

[sant]

 

Yes, Your parents(his) are right. They are not superstitious. If the final rites like cremation are to be as per sastra, a person of a different faith should not do it. It is not as per Dharma. So choose between the girl, and hinduism.

You can't have both.I mean you can't practice both religions.

 

iM SORRY

YOUR WRONG.

HINDUISM IS NOT EVEN A RELIGION.

AND

WHEN DID THE WIFE STARTED DOING FINAL RITES.

IT IS DONE BY THE HUSBAND ONLY.

WOMEN AS PER MY KNOWLEDGE ARE NOT ALLOWED TO BURN THE BODY

IT IS DONE BY A MALE SO EVEN YOUR CONDITIONS DONT APPLY HERE TO THE SLIGHTEST EXTENT.

 

 

 

When the vedas were brought into written form, even then Christianity was not born, hence you don't find any mention about catholics and so on in the vedas.

 

 

IN THAT CASE THEN SHE SHOULD NOT EVEN BE REJECTED SINCE CHRISTIANITY WASNT EVEN THERE.