RohitBehal Posted June 12, 2009 Report Share Posted June 12, 2009 SAIRAM, Let me differ to my own views and share what i have learnt down through these years into spirituality...REGARDING MARRIAGE & SPIRITUALITY. Marriage is not an obstacle to moksha or any spiritual dharma or else many Lords/Saints would yet be on this worldly plane trying to attain moksha. First..the greatest yogi according to indian scriptures is Lord Shiva...who himself is married to Mata Parvati and has 2 kids- Lord Ganesha & Lord Kartikeye. So, the question about following Spirituality and avoiding your worldly duties does not arise at all. Even Lord Vishnu, Lord Krishna were married. Many other saints too led a happy married life together with their spiritual life. Lord Rama,King Janak all were too married. You will have to comeback to fulfill any left over duties you were bound to complete. Second, Now as one has to fulfill his duties & responsibilities for which he has taken birth, and if one avoids it or if for some reason fails to fulfill his present lifetimes mission...he will Definitely take a RE-BIRTH and come back to this world to complete his present and previous pending responsibilities...so one may avoid getting married, like myself but if i am bound to united with someone, i will definitely be united...if not in this lifetime..then the next for sure...now you tell me who wants to come back again and again to this world...& that even to get married ? As long as you enjoy everything without being bonded by it...the Karmic significance is nullified ...and you are not re-born for it nor can Maya touch you then. Third, you cannot term marriage as Maya...as if so then all our relations are Maya too ! The food you eat, water you drink or the air you breathe is also all Maya then...now can you leave any of those to avoid Maya..., NO..you cannot right...so marriage is also a necessity , its one of the basics of life...You have to learn to live with Spirituality and the worldly Maya, hand in hand. Now how can one achieve that....its Simple...follow the doctrine of "NON-ATTACHMENT". You can live a luxurious life, Marry..go to discos etc etc but do it all without any attachment as attachments create Karmas for which one is Re-Born. Raja Janaka had all the luxuries in life, whcih he didnt abandon..but enjoyed every bit of it but yet remained non-atached. There are many such more examples of great saints who were married but yet Renunciates. So, if you see Baba everywhere and you know that Baba dwells in all and in all forms then how can you avoid anything in life...as then you will be avoiding Baba in some form or the other !!! Now that doesnt mean to adopt any or all vices in life as here the role of Discrimination arises...you have to discriminate as to what you consciousness guides you. Thats why, in many indian scriptures they say that one should have 'VIVEKA" & " VAIRAGYA"... thats Discrimination and Non-Attachment as explained above. So my brother, sit calmly with a relaxed mind and go in touch with your deep consciousness and contemplate/discriminate what is right or wrong and then carry it on with Non-attachment. CONTROL YOUR MIND WITH YOUR SOUL RATHER THAN YOURMIND CONTROLLING YOU WITH YOUR SOUL ITSELF !!! By discriminate i mean...to draw a line between what your Maya driven "MIND" tells you & what your Soul driven "Consciousnees" guides you. As there is a very very thin subtle line between ones Mind and Consciousness..thats why people often get confused as to whats right and whats wrong leading to wrong decisions in life. (Like Me)..we often take our minds advice as the correct one as mind is driven by Maya and it makes us do whats good for it and not for us...if it finds comfort in vices ..it will make you dive into it and if it feels to enjoy freedom and not to be tied down in any restrictions ..it will make you a LONER under the garb of being a celibate or not getting along with others or Fault finding in others and then avoiding them.... I have so much more to say...my god...that if i do and if you do read all of it...your marriage age might be over by the time you understand what i am trying to say haha..so i am signing off now....let me know if anything else Moral - PHYSICALLY ENJOY THE WORLD BUT CONSCIOUSLY BE A RENUNCIATE. SAIRAM, ROHIT BEHAL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sephiroth Posted June 12, 2009 Report Share Posted June 12, 2009 Instead of asking whether you should marry or not, ask yourself what you WHY you wish to marry? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sant Posted June 12, 2009 Report Share Posted June 12, 2009 Second, Now as one has to fulfill his duties & responsibilities for which he has taken birth, and if one avoids it or if for some reason fails to fulfill his present lifetimes mission...he will Definitely take a RE-BIRTH and come back to this world to complete his present and previous pending responsibilities...so one may avoid getting married, like myself but if i am bound to united with someone, i will definitely be united...if not in this lifetime..then the next for sure...now you tell me who wants to come back again and again to this world...& that even to get married ? I dont think so mr behal saibaba was also not married. Upanishads say that there are mountains and mountains of your past karamas so in that way you dont know in how many lives you will have to be united with how many people will have to become your wife.You seem to be unhappy with your non married life so certainly you go and get married if you want but dont tell others that brahmacharya is wrong and is an obstacle to spriritual advancement.If somebody doesnt want to marry then let him be dont forcefully become his mother. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sambya Posted June 12, 2009 Report Share Posted June 12, 2009 Third, you cannot term marriage as Maya...as if so then all our relations are Maya too ! actually they are !! whatever you are saying is true ......very true !! but theres one little hitch ..........the moment you are in a relation you cannot help but fall in attachment unless you are a ucchaadhikari with the capability to renounce like buddha .......so marriage is also a necessity , its one of the basics of life. yes marriage in a necessity for the simple fact that the creation has to continue and in a moral and acceptable way . thats why you find the god does not give sufficent vairagya to people lest they all run and trun sannyasis ....You have to learn to live with Spirituality and the worldly Maya, hand in hand. Now how can one achieve that....its Simple...follow the doctrine of "NON-ATTACHMENT". You can live a luxurious life, Marry..go to discos etc etc but do it all without any attachment as attachments create Karmas for which one is Re-Born. Raja Janaka had all the luxuries in life, whcih he didnt abandon..but enjoyed every bit of it but yet remained non-atached. There are many such more examples of great saints who were married but yet Renunciates. things are not so easy friend !!! no matter how hard you try you are bound to fall into the trap of attachment . janaka and others entered into samsara after attaining to self realization . one can be perfectly unattached to samsara only after he has reached that stage . before that attachment and maya may engulf you any moment . moreover they were associates of lord himself and specifically sent into this world to show the ideal way to live in a family . what comparision can be drawn between those high souls and ordinary individuals of modern world ?!! and , you cannot live with maya and spirituality hand in hand . its not possible to balance on two boats for long ! if you think that im going to do a little of samsara and a little of bhakti parrallely you cannot progress to higher stages . if you are throwing a little peice of stone and want it to hit the top of a coconut tree you have to keep you aim at the sky . then chances are that the stone might actually touch the treetop . but if you aim at the tree top at throw it , chances are high that it will hit the trunk !! aims and ambition of a spritual practitioner should be high . just think that if high sadhus can have a fall down from their goals inspite of having strong determinination , how difficult it would be for someone with such weak determination . we have to be cautious at every step of our existence not to let in maya . there can be not treaty with illusion whatsoever !!! if you live in a house build of ink , no matter how hard you try you are bound to get stained !!! if the ssnnaysis , even sfter leaving everything for god , labour for entire life to reah a ordinary level of spirituality , what might be the condition of one who marries ? Moral - PHYSICALLY ENJOY THE WORLD BUT CONSCIOUSLY BE A RENUNCIATE. thats a bad bad moral ...........confused moral i would say !! (for a person who considers spirituality as the primary goal in life . and one who doesnt is not spiritual yet) lastly in the matter of reaching god through living in samsara , im not saying its impossible , but its so so difficult !!!! im unmarried now and i can go on a difficlut trek or mountain climbing any moment without thinking back !! but the moment im married i have to think twice , because i have my wife and children dependent on me !! bondage came in automatically !! but if one is sufficiently vigilant and sincere , and if he recieves the grace , one might come out as a real devotee even from samsara . he(lord) makes the mute speak and the lame cross the mountains ......................!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sambya Posted June 12, 2009 Report Share Posted June 12, 2009 one more thing , im not suggesting here that marraige is a absolutely hindrance to spirituality , but it is definitely an extra impediment to that . and secondly people should not be advised or dragged into sannyasa . a true adhikari would automatically cringe in the mere mention of marriage from an early age . only such individuals are fit to get into sannyasa . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kali_Upasaka Posted June 12, 2009 Report Share Posted June 12, 2009 Is it only a choice between being a Grahastha and Sannyasi? I know individuals who are spiritually inclined and have not married. They do not think they have attained sufficient maturity to become a Sannyasi. I do not think you can become a Sannyasi just for the asking. There are pre-requisites for that. It is much more difficult because you have to be given a Sannyasa Diksha by a guru. And they do not hand it out to all and sundry. You can continue to be a Brahmachari and choose not to be a Sannyasi. The Ashrama classification is more social than spiritual. Sannyasa Diksha does not in any way assure you of salvation. Nor does a marriage deny you that. It depends on the individual. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sambya Posted June 12, 2009 Report Share Posted June 12, 2009 You can continue to be a Brahmachari and choose not to be a Sannyasi. yes , thats a option too . infact it is brahmacharya that is needed . a perfect brahmachari is indeed a king amongst men . struggling for brahmacharya is the toughest struggle in this world and one who has succeeded has already conquered the world !! a perfect brahmachari might not be a sannyasi but a sannyasi has to be perfect brahmachari The Ashrama classification is more social than spiritual. Sannyasa Diksha does not in any way assure you of salvation. Nor does a marriage deny you that. It depends on the individual. true Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kshama Posted June 12, 2009 Report Share Posted June 12, 2009 Respected Members, Yes a very interesting topic indeed. Made me realize all perspectives of thoughts pertaining this subject. Thank you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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