[Rajarajeshwari_Kalpataru] Dear Nanba!

[Guest guest]

Dear Shreeram,

Ananda kanneer (cry after experienceing divinity) can be experienced through any of the five senses. Once Aravangad Jayaraman was singing the Aarangal Chooteeduvom during the feast session after the kumbabhishekam at my father' sisters house place in Palghat. So engrossed were all that they stated weeping to his melodious varnam. Sometimes I get emotionally charged and enjoy the mirth of joy when i get a new person through whom I get info on Ambal and any god/goddess. I do not realise how but I become a child when I experience the warmth of the blessing in disguise. This feeling makes me humble again. Problably Ambal herself has been initiating this process and making me shed my ego and ignorance through another. Time and again I used to think why not accept Sanyasa so that I shall always have the everlasting intoxication of the eternal bliss. But practical thinking doesnt allow me to do this after being a family man. I feel guilty sometimes

when I think that I am a prey to material desires. But it so happens I will have to lead my life as it is decided by Her.

In fact I saw some of your posts in other sites and was really overjoyed that there is somebody who is ideal person to share his knowledge with me.

I have undergone different stages in life. right from thinking spiritual life is just a blasphemy to seeing the real bliss in life in psiritual life, though I am still in the pursuit of wisdom and truth pertaining to spirituality. What may have missed the eye long back is showing me that what a great fool I had been in the past years.When I started meditating, there has been a sequence. I was fortunate enough to contact many learned people and thereby gain more knowledge that which I was desiring of. And each and every time, the newer learned people I came in contact with are more learned than the previous ones. This shows the level of learning. I am happy that my pursuit in knowing the eternal truth has been consistently improving and now finally I am placed by Ambal at your feet for more learning. Thanks to Ambal for showing me the way through you.

Jai Ambal.

 

para_anuloma <para_anuloma wrote:

Dear Nanba,Iam a bit sober now after weeping my heart out.Thanks to you I experienced some tears ago and offered it slyly at Amba's feet. For my guru what can I offer tell me? Is my offering of love true and pure? What can I offer tell me Rajkumar Anna!What you see are just my mechanical typings on your screen but do you see my heart crying here? Your favourite Anniyan's heart crying here?I type these words and my postings because I love people who are trying for God in some form. And I wont yak like other people. I will help even if I have to die for that sake.Death then becomes meaningful an eternity. In my school choir we used to say the St.Assisi prayer which had lines like...In dying we are born to eternal life.Die to old concepts be born anew my friend. Be dynamic and also non-dynamic.That will

complete the cycle.Thiruvaasagam saysAyyaainai ayyarpiranai nammai agampadunkatunkarunai kaatum!And then he goes on to say poienna piyai meiyammaiyai bodhadi potradithol....This sounds like a eulogy on Shiva...but Manickavasagar who had a secret guru was being invoked in these 'varigal' not even his beautiful Shiva and then he goes on to sayPoienna poiyyai meiyammaiya bodhadi potradithol...it was a clever attack on divine mother who gives maya and closes the eye...I say clever because he praises the third eye region where Guru stays sometimes in the Guru-shishya leela cycle which is trillions of time more beautiful than shiva and shakthi union.These are things you will never find in any book.I used to even spit on Amba's photo saying that yuu are maya you seperate me from my Guru.Just because my guru has aging and old hairs he is not 'not beautiful'. Do you think Amba will be angry at me my

friend?That is the greatest maya m y friend to think that shiva-shakthi union is the highest...it is guru-shishya union whioch is the highest...and amba is the disciple of shiva and hence that union is the highest! AASK ANY MODERN DAY KALIYUGA WOMAN TO HOLD HER HUSBANDS HANDS...She will have thousand's of misgivings even if her husband is an angel and a saint!If I have hurt anyone's feeling by using the words spit please forgive me.MAY ESHWAREE WHOM I LOVE VERY DEARLY ALSO FORGIVE ME FOR THIS BLASPHEMY....But still guru is sarvam for me.Since you used the words 'shisyathva' when referring to Amba in your post. I think there is a slight chance for you. But If you can get her as your guru matha then that will mean she should come down in physical form and teach you. I do not believe in stories like ekalavya when it comes to spirituality!I take all your spits on me for speaking like thisYet Iam cleansed of

my sins with your very spits!Sorry for getting amotional again when talking about guru....One can never be sober when talking about one's guru that is why i avoid cleverly that topic and discuss about Amba.After I remain your koolikaaran for Amba.,if i may say soYour anniyan and emotional scoundrel again,Shreeram BalijepalliSend instant messages to your online friends http://uk.messenger.