I just wanna say that I really do like all of you, I've just been having a really, REALLY, bad month.

[Guest guest]

Namaste,

 

Hello everyone. Sorry if I offended anyone with my

frequent cussing. I just try to be me as whatever Maa

wants me to be, rather than stress myself to become

this ideal that a certain order of humanity deems as

appropriate human conduct. I'd like to thank you

(sorry, I can't remember your name) for being bold and

straight up saying " Shyam Wazir " when addressing my

use of foul language. Thank you.

 

Right now I am busy accommodating my friend. He has

started snorting cocaine again. Last time he was this

much into it was when he was 15; but now he's 21. I

only pray that Maa could help him. A part of me wants

to distance myself from him as he is very negative

about life and thus I feel as if I'm brought down with

him whenever I associate with him for extended periods

of time. But my reasoning tells me that I should stay

friends with him because as Maa's devotee, it should

be my foremost duty to help those in need of love and

care. I also have another friend who got kicked out of

my youth group and now he's binging on

meth-emphetamines. I don't know WHAT to do! Any of you

have any ideas?

 

By the way, to that guy who didn't like me using Maa

Bhairavi's mantra, sorry if I said anything that might

have hurt your feelings. It was really cruel of me to

demean you in the manner I did when you were just

sharing your opinion as what you felt in that moment.

Things have been going on in my life that the last

thing I wanted to hear was somebody telling me what is

proper and improper in my personal spirituality. I've

honestly just been under a lot of stress lately with

preparing for school, Christmas shopping, planning for

New Year's, babysitting my younger cousin, my mentally

ill parents falling back into their issues (mom's

schizophrenic, dad's manic depressive), and my two

drug addicted friends. I also have a congenital heart

disease called a tricuspid atresia and I've been

feeling a huge loss of energy as well as heart

palpations in the last few weeks.

Please don't get me wrong as I am not looking for

sympathy, I'm just letting you know why I may have

been on edge and extremely short with life

circumstances lately. Trust me, I am just having a

really, REALLY, bad last couple of months. Things are

just starting to get better as of yesterday. I've done

quite a bit of clearing in the last 24 hours, mainly

praying to Maa that She give me the strength to pull

myself together plus I'm de-toxing by limiting my

food-intake.

 

Lotsa love, and may Janani make all of your dreams

come true.

your pal, Shyam.

 

p.s. There's a really neat Mariyamman Temple out here

in Vancouver. I don't have the address on me but when

I do I'll post it.

 

 

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