Ending my 9 year wait at Belapur Hospital - Dr Balwinder

[Guest guest]

" dr_balwinder " <dr_balwinder

Sat Jan 31, 2004 7:26 pm

Ending my 9 year wait at Belapur Hospital

 

 

Dear Brothers and Sisters,

 

I am narrating this story of my experience because I know that there

may be some SY who may be in a similar plight but are at odds as to

what to do next and also the most important reason is to give them

faith & hope if by any chance it has diminished.

 

I was given my realization late October 1994 and since that time I

had only on three occasions felt what I feel may be taken as the cool

breeze in my opinion and comparing it with what I feel now I would

say only once did I really feel the cool breeze from October 1994

till mid-November 1993.

 

I was the only one in my family practicing SY when my first son was

born in 1997 and second in 1999 and third in 2002.The first two boys

would meditate with me on and off.It was only somewhere in August

2003 that my wife finally took to SY and she had no problems feeling

the cool breeze immediately whereas I was still not feeling it.

 

 

WHY BELAPUR AFTER 9 YRS ?

The reason why I decided not to wait anymore were multiple

1)the desire to participate much much more in the spread of SY than

what I had been doing so far

2)my wife had started feeling vibrations and would soon be asking me

to how I felt

3)there is a VIP family/friend that has a member suffering who I

wanted to help but I needed to feel the vibrations myself

 

WHAT I HAD DONE SO FAR

I had tried seeking " treatment' before and was " treated' by some

senior SY somewhere in the year 1995-6 and there was not much of

difference, in fact none and thus my silent wait all this years. I

kept quiet for many reasons and accepted the fact that I was just

supposed to get my feeling when AdiShakti decides the time is right

for me.

I have been meditating twice daily since the day I got my self

realization late October 1994.

I have been going to the collective regularly at least 2-4 times a

month except for the period of mid2000 till mid2002 where it was

about 1-3 times a month .I have been to GP where as we were

approaching GP the yogis traveling with me in the same vehicle were

commenting on feeling the vibrations becoming stronger as we got

closer to GP and feeling nothing I just said nothing neither agreeing

or disagreeing.

I also went to a B-day pooja in New Delhi 2001.

Every now and then some SYogi/ni would tell me that my vibes are

good , my chakras are okay and some who have visited my meditation

room in my house which is solely for meditation feeling very good

vibrations.

 

It was just like going to a doctor with a genuine complain that I

had problem breathing/hearing/seeing etc but the experienced doctor

examining you and doing the necessary tests finding out that nothing

is wrong.

 

 

" OPPURTUNITY " TO GO TO BELAPUR CREATED (WITH EASE)

So decision was made to go to Belapur in my heart about 12 months ago

and the opportunity to go presented by itself in the 2nd half of last

year when my biological mother(who has tremendous respect for Shree

Mataji but is not in Sahaj) wanted to go to India for some personal

matters.My wife was pregnant 4 months then and the youngest being

just 12mths old and thus going to India was not feasible for

them.At the same time she did not want me to be away more than 2

weeks.How was I to go to Belapur when I had to accompany my mother

for at least 8-9 days to finish her work and Dr Madhur recommending

I stay for 2 weeks.

 

My wife was too new in Sahaj(few months) to understand my " problem "

in inability to feel cool breeze for the past 9 years and that I

needed to stay for 2 weeks at Belapur.I was not prepared to risk a 9

yr wait for her to take up SY to be jeopardized in anyway by my

explanation.

 

Then divine help started its play, a very good Gujurati friend of

mine who was my senior in medical school and now was a cardiologist

in Mozambique was also planning to come to India. If we met it would

be meeting after 15yrs and he wanted to spend some days with me(he

mentioned 1 whole week) but could only meet me in Mumbai. I was

looking forward to meet him too and then suddenly it dawned on me

that I could use this reason to go to Mumbai. My wife reluctantly

agreed to us(me & my mum) being away for 3 weeks.

 

Then suddenly out of nowhere a businessman involved in setting

computerized hospitals in the country approached me to be an advisor

to their group and wanted me to check a few hospitals in India using

a particular software(PULSE) with all expenses and other expenditure

paid for a period of a week. I extended my period of stay in India by

another week without informing my wife knowing full well she will not

agree. I thought I will tell her when my 3 weeks in India are up

– I

felt it would have been easier for her to accept a 1 week delay at

the end of my 3week stay in India than to tell her right then that

my stay in India will be 4 weeks.I somehow changed my mind and I did

let her know a week before I left for India.

 

To cut a long story short , the plan to check the software in India

did not materialize at the last moment since the management decided

for an Austrian IT system(AHIS).The date of return could not be

changed by then since this was peak traveling time and thus I had the

2 weeks extra for my stay at Belapur as advised by Dr Madhur. Until

today I do not know why my wife did not question the duration of my

stay(4 weeks) in India despite me letting her know my date of

departure and return about a week before I left.

 

Landed in India on the 10th of November and had done the bulk of my

work which my mother wanted done by the 15th and took the flight to

Mumbai on the 17th(BTW it is much much cheaper to travel by rail

within India if you have some extra time).

 

BELAPUR

Reached Belapur at 1145am on 17-11 and after registration , I waited

a little while to meet Dr Madhur since it was a working day .After

the normal pleasantries when 2 strangers meet we discussed my problem

and just sitting across the table she told me what was wrong with me

as far as the subtle system was concerned. She told me the reasons

for my inability to feel the vibrations and told me how to overcome

my problem. She then told me who my doctor during my stay there will

be and called Anil to see me to my room.

 

I rested for a while after unpacking and after a bath I went to the

treatment room which is also the OPD clinic.I was attended to by Dr

Anujad and she asked me what my problems were and I replied the same

as to Dr Madhur – no vibrations for 9 yrs.She then proceeded to

treat

me and after she had finished she told which of my charkas needed

extra work.What was really very reassuring to my medically inclined

mind was that her diagnosis of charkas were matching that of Dr

Madhur.There was no change in my vibratory awareness after the

treatment as far as I was concerned. I was told to do some specific

treatment in the form of mantras, footsoak , meditating on mother

earth etc and did it diligently.3 days passed and I still could not

feel the vibrations.

 

Just a brief schedule of the daily practice at Belapur Hospital

5-6 am: meditate sitting in the common lawn,

7am : morning tea served

8am – about 9am : collective meditation

9am :breakfast

6-8am & 8-10.30 am : individualized clearing as advised by doctor(s)

in charge

10.30 – 2 pm : clinic time but an in-patient will spend about

30minutes on average being cleared by his/her doctor.

1pm : lunch is served

2-5pm : individualized clearing as advised by doctor(s) in charge,

rest time

4.30pm: tea served

5-7 : clearing by doctors at clinic(this sessions is meant just for

in patients only)

7pm : dinner served

8pm-9.30/10 pm: watch Shree Mataji's tape , bhajans and collective

meditation.

 

STRUGGLES AND CLEARING OF DOUBTS

Somewhere between the 4-6th days I began to feel some " coolness " at

the central 3 fingers of my right hand .It was so " strange " a feeling

which I do not remember ever feeling in the past 9 years that I could

not say with conviction that it was the cool breeze. The only similar

experience to this sensation was –

1)hands exposed during winter (but then the whole hand felt cold)

2)wet fingertips feeling cool as the water evaporates(although the

cool breeze felt more cooler)

So in a nutshell as far as I was concerned I had no convincing

experience of vibrations/cool breeze after 6 days of treatment

 

Then somewhere on the 6th or 7th day I felt vibrations on my right

hand fingers while meditating early in the morning on the lawn and it

took me by surprise and despite checking for drafts and putting the

hand in all different positions I still felt the vibrations and

finally was convinced when I put my non feeling(of cool breeze) left

hand's fingers just 1cm away on top of the fingers of my right hand

and the vibrations still were being felt on right but not on the

left.

 

Then on the same evening or the next day after the collective

meditaion where I did not feel any " convincing " vibrations , we had a

very spontaneous session of bhajan singing where the " patients "

played the major role in it and suddenly strong vibrations were felt

when my mind was least thinking about them.

 

On either the 8th or 9th day , Dr Anujad could not attend to me for

some reason and I was attended to by Dr Manoj and the diagnosis by

him was similar to Dr Anujad and treatment was the almost the same. I

mention it because it is relevant scientifically – in western

medicine we use history taking, physical examination , blood tests ,

X-rays/scans etc to arrive at a diagnosis and if done correctly ,

good doctors arrive at the same diagnosis.Here a brief history is

taken, no tests were necessary and no physical examination too and

just by the doctors strong vibratory awareness a diagnosis reached

very quickly.Even Dr Manoj reached the same diagnosis.

 

To the doctors using SY techniques it may be no big deal to come to

the same conclusion but to a doctor trained in allopathic/western

medicine it was and is very significant.

 

BREAKING THE CONDITIONING OF THE NEGATIVITY AROUND

Many a time I had been told by well-meaning fellow yogis that I

should stay away from any place deemed negative and the meaning of

a " negative place " varied to a certain extent with every yogi that

spoke about it.

 

In order to break this conditioning I intentionally went to cyber

cafes in the afternoons every other day and the other reason was to

keep in touch with my wife as well as kids. I am not encouraging

going to any negative places(to me cyber café does not fit as

negative although I know a lot of people come to surf on negative

websites).I will talk more about negative places in my 2nd part of

this post.I mention " negative places " to send a message home that a

genuine SYogi/ni should be able to face any negativity and

bhoots/bhadhas(however many there maybe) should be scared of you

rather than the other way around.

 

I heard enough stories from patients while at the hospital where

SYogi/nis who came for treatment .They had " embarrassing " (to me it

was an embarrassment to know that there are such SY) stories that

their fellow SYogi/ni stayed away from them since they felt their

vibrations were not good or labeled them as negative. There was even

1 case where the patient was stunned that the female doctor in

Belapur touched her because it had been ingrained in her mind that

she was too negative to even be nearby let alone touch. She

got " cured " relatively easily and could have avoided the trip when

actually all she needed was more compassion from her own collective

for her. I know of people in my own collective who claim that so and

so is negative and has poor vibrations and try to sit away from them

to avoid " catching " but I could not be bothered then(since I had no

vibratory awareness then) and now I am going to make it a point to

sit near them. I cannot understand how in the Ashram anything can

affect my charkas and what is point calling ourselves SYogi/ni if we

cannot face any negativity head-on be it in or out of the ashram.

 

I know that there are exceptions to the case where no SYogi/ni can

help that person but IMO this type of cases are very few and far

between.

 

ENFORCING THE BELIEF THAT IS ADISHAKTI THAT IS CURING ME

There were about 3 days when Dr Anujad could not attend to me and on

some of this occasions Dr Madhur said she would attend to my

treatment and there was one occasion I was late and she had to go off

for a presentation and she told me that one of the doctorrs would

attend to me.Dr X had earlier called me for my treatment but I had

declined his offer since I was due to be treated by Dr Madhur.

 

When Dr Madhur left I had to wait about an hour before my turn came

again and it was with Dr X again. Once seated in front of SM's photo

I was left by Dr X who went to attend to some outpatient and I sat

meditating and after about 15-20 mins began to feel " neglected " by

the doctor. After another 10 mins wait I decided I will forgo today

morning's treatment and also felt a bit guilty at leaving without

waiting anymore but in my heart knew SM understood. I had my lunch

and slept with the fact that I had missed a treatment and the

typical " conditioned " mind telling me that I may fall back in my

progress.

 

I woke up refreshed and was wondering why both my hands fingertips

were feeling cold.When I put both my hands under my armpits I did not

feel cold hands and still kept them there for a minute or so and on

putting my hands out same feeling of vibrations on fingertips and my

bare feet were not cold at all.

 

Another barrier to my leaving the hospital was removed since it made

me realize that my ability to feel the vibrations was progressing

well.It meant that missing one treatment did not mean my progress

stopped or regressed.It meant that what we do overall in the long run

to improve our vibratory awareness is more important.

 

A similar example can be given.Western medicine most of the times

never cures you.I say most of the times because antibiotics and

antiviral drugs do cure a person but these too play a role only for a

short acute period.The rest of the healing before during and after

the infection is still carried out by the body's immune system.

The rest of the bulk of current day diseases are just being treated

symptomatically without curing which is why diabetics,hypetensives,

arthritis,asthma,IHD etc.etc patients are on life long treatment.

All this diseases can be avoided totally or delayed till very old age

if a person looks after his physical health well from young by having

the right lifestyle habits. Overall care in the long run starting

early in life and consistency is very very important.

 

In Belapur the doctors just help to get your chakras put right and

guide you to do the right path but to maintain them and improve

further is our own responsibility.If we nurture our spirit well it

will grow and that brings me to the next topic.The doctors are also

acutely aware that most of the SYogi/nis have stopped at and are

comfortable at the level of having just good vibrations and are not

going deeper.We were not discussing the patients at the hospital when

this topic came up but SYogi/nis in general.

 

That evening the same doctor X attended to me and made the same

diagnosis.Since I was already feeling the vibrations on my hands the

dr wanted me to feel on my head.He worked on me for a good 20 minutes

and at the end of it I told him I feel nothing and he and his intern

(learning dr) were amazed.He said that " tumari kundalini toh barsaa

rahe hai " meaning your kundalini is just gushing out – I smiled

because I knew it was the truth and it would be just a matter of time

before I could verify it myself.

 

Dr Madhur kept on humbly re-emphasising that it is the AdiShakti that

was clearing us and improving our subtle system and that the doctors

were just AdiShakti's instruments for doing so.

 

In part II I will talk about (1)how I " prepared " myself to leave the

hospital (2)the meaning of love that mother often mentions (3) other

fellow SYogi/nis experiences (4)my experiences after being

discharged.

 

My philosophy of life is simple when I am struggling towards a goal

doing my best - it is like climbing a mountain, some may climb faster

than you but you know for sure that the view at the mountain top is

still going to be the same.

Enjoy the journey!!

 

Dr Balwinder

Consultant Surgeon & Head

Dept of Otorhinolaryngology,Head & Neck Surgery,

Putrajaya Hospital,

Putrajaya , Malaysia.

 

 

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