The Karmic Relationship Friday, Dec 5 2008

[Guest guest]

reason i chose The Karmic Relationship: " we should realize that

within all people is the Atman or god. God can be realized within our

own being or it can be realized within another person. We should

understand that all is one. All beingness reflects the sacredness of

deity. It is all around us, within us, and within others. No one can

be an object. "

 

 

The Karmic Relationship Friday, Dec 5 2008

 

After writing the recent post about Twin flames, I wanted to follow-

up with another post to clarify what I meant. Frankly often women are

objectified no matter what they do, and these days men are as well.

Often the reason ascetics avoid women is because the women make

them " sin " . If you examine their reasoning carefully you will see

that this is a very selfish and egotistical reason for being

celibate. They have turned women into an object to be avoided.

Instead of trying to understand people as people and letting go of

our obsessions in doing so, we simply turn people into objects of

consumption to satisfy our desires. The celibate objectifies women as

a sin to be avoided and by doing so have committed the same sin as

the individual who goes to a house of prostitution to get an object

of desire, nothing more.

 

Some men seem to think that women are for pleasure or Kama, and if

they think that they may as well be celibate. A relationship should

be pleasurable, but it is far more than that. To truly communicate

with another we have to let go of some of our own ego attachments. A

true deep understanding of another can be a deeply transforming

experience. Instead of becoming attached to this experience by

claiming that it is special or a soul mate situation, we should

realize that within all people is the Atman or god. God can be

realized within our own being or it can be realized within another

person. We should understand that all is one. All beingness reflects

the sacredness of deity. It is all around us, within us, and within

others. No one can be an object.

 

That being said I will speak about my own karmic experience. When I

was twenty-nine years old, I sat down in meditation for a long time.

When I stood up from that meditation, my whole life changed. I had

the sudden realization that my entire relationship with my current

husband consisted of me trying to change him. His parents had asked

me to divorce him, but I had stubbornly held on where I simply did

not belong. He had preferred the company of his parents to me and

refused to compromise in anyway. I realized that I was fighting the

wind. I left my husband with two small children to seek a different

way of life. I picked up a book at the local library, and the guru

suggested that we chant " Om Namah Shivaya " I did not even know how to

pronounce the chant. Right away I began to have dreams about another

person. I knew from my dreams that he was in the army and that he was

Thai. I also knew what year he was born in. I also dreamed that he

was in Germany at the time, which turned out to be true. On the day I

met him I looked at the slowly rising moon in the opposite end of the

sky as the setting sun and I realized that it was time. I walked down

the sandy beach that evening and there he was. We went to a local

disco and danced the night away. He was Shiva to me. I did not

realize at the time that women worship Shiva to bring their perfect

mate to them.

 

This man was by no means a perfect person. We would have many

conflicts, and I would spend many painful hours in meditation trying

to understand what they meant. It is a karmic relationship, which

acts as a sander to the stubborn pieces of our personality that

refuse mend. It is water to the riverbank or the mill to the corn. We

have to realize that often conflicts in our life do reflect on our

own inner weaknesses or themes that we work on in this lifetime.

 

I also realized from my divorce that my issues had come with me. I

was carrying them around. I should not blame other people for what is

in me. It was at this time that I made a vow that I would not divorce

again. Stubbornness and pure grit got me through some times, and wore

down the ego issues that I had been carrying around.

 

After fifteen years with this man, I had to say that I am a better

person for having had this relationship. Some of my karmic issues

would never have been resolved otherwise. I did think he was my soul

mate, but it was he who pointed out that we could only be soul mates

to god. It is ego that thinks that a special person waits for us when

in fact all people are special. I have come to realize that I am

complete within myself. This sense of completeness makes me a better

mate than I used to be.

 

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