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Who is the Kali?

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Bhakta: How did life arise?

 

Aya: Life comes from life only.

 

Bhakta: How is that?

 

Aya: Will a brick give birth to a child?

 

Bhakta: No.

 

Aya: So it is a human which gives birth. Hence consciousness comes

from

consciousness alone.

 

Bhakta: But they have said humans have randomly evolved. Initially we

must have come from lifeless minerals only.

 

Aya: How is that so? Listen. There are two manifestations of Iraivan.

One is jadam. These we call the physical atoms. These behave

mechanistically. Hence they appear lifeless. The other manifestation

is

the atmas. These exhibit power of will. Even amongst the jivatmas the

plants, microbes and bacterias exhibit the least consciousness. The

animals and especially the mammmals exhibit the most. Even the dog has

intelligence. It understands pain, it is loyal, it remembers its

master

and is able to distinguish strangers. It even learns some tricks and

is

able to understand human's command by language. But this ability in it

is limited only. It is in humans that the power of atma (spirit

consciousness) shine the most. Hence it should be known that by Mayai

which thereafter causes Kalam (time) and asaivu (movement in space-

time), is how Iraivan masks its creations. Hence the jadam exhibits

the

least of consciousness whilst humans the most.

 

Bhakta: Who created the Iraivan?

 

Aya: It is not created. It is unborn nor undying. It is not made nor

can be destroyed.

 

Bhakta: What does Iraivan use to create this universe and the

multitude

of beings (atmas)?

 

Aya: It uses its own Self.

 

Bhakta: You have said that Iraivan is non destructible. All things are

said to come out of Iraivan. So how is it that the things which come

out from Iraivan and therefore part of Iraivan exhibit destructibly?

If

you say that you cannot be mutilated, then any part of yourself cannot

be mutilated also. Is not Iraivan's creation part of itself?

 

Aya: True. Rather than saying Iraivan has created the universe and the

beings, it is more accurate to say Iraivan has projected the universe.

 

Bhakta: I don't quite understand.

 

Aya: Okay look. Let us take the physical jadam. Ultimately what is it

made of?

 

Bhakta: It is made of energy only.

 

Aya: Okay. Is this energy destructible?

 

Bhakta: No, energy cannot be destroyed. It can only change form.

 

Aya: Yes, nothing in this material world actually gets destroyed in

the

actual sense. Which means nothing becomes totally non existent. It

only

changes form. For example when you burn the oil. The oil becomes

energy

of heat and light. This energy thereafter becomes something else.

Nothing is lost and becomes zero. It just changes into something else.

 

But since Iraivan has tied certain qualities to certain types of form,

hence with the change of the form its quality changes. For example

before you burn the camphor it existed in a solid form. After it got

burnt, it dissipated into vapor, light and heat. Yet this vapor might

fall into some where else and condense there. Energy is never

destroyed. It can only change form. In truth it is never created also.

It exists in a potential form. For example let us take petrol. If you

burn it, it will produce explosion whereby the energy thereof is

cleverly used

by man's

ingenuity as the engine to drive your car.

 

Bhakta: But the petrol is no more.

 

Aya: It exists as the carbon monoxide and other gasses emitted in the

burning and let out through your exhaust pipe. Look even if you break

down matter, it exists as pure energy.

 

Bhakta: Yes, the equation is E = mc2.

 

Aya: So understand that in truth no material atoms are totally

destroyed. They merely change form. All the qualities and

possibilities

are in Iraivan. Iraivan merely decides this particular form to exhibit

this particular quality and so on. Hence we get a multitude of things.

That is all.

 

Bhakta: Does Iraivan have a personality, some say it is an impersonal

force?

 

Aya: The power of consciousness is revealed the most in humans. And

humans exhibit the uniqueness of personality, willpower and ability to

think. Hence humans could make a conscious choice. That is the meaning

of will. If not we will be like robots only. As such for sure the

source of consciousness itself (Iraivan) must have a supreme will.

Hence only it has created the universe with such and such form.

 

Bhakta: How about the atmas, do they get dissipated like the jadam?

 

Aya: Unlike the jadam, they do not dissipate. They remain whole. They

only inhabit jadam body which decays and dies (dissipates). But that

which affects them is Mayai. Mayai is in the Iraivan, yet Iraivan is

not affected by it. The jivatmas however are affected by it.

 

Bhakta: How could this be so?

 

Aya: It is because Iraivan gives rise to Time (Kalam).

 

Bhakta: So is there a region where there is no time?

 

Aya: Yes, there is, its known as Kali (Akalam - beyond time)? In order

to experience one's relationship with the Iraivan, one must cross to

this Akalam only. If not one will not be able to realize the Iraivan,

one can merely postulate or deduce about the Iraivan and so on. The

Iraivan cannot be proved to exist.

 

Bhakta: How to reach this Akalam?

 

Aya: By merging into OM.

 

Bhakta: Where is this OM?

 

Aya: It is in one's body only.

 

Bhakta: How to reach it?

 

Aya: It is by dhyanam only.

 

Bhakta: You have said time and time again that Iraivan is Kali. How is

this so? Is it the symbolization pregnant in the form of Kali?

 

Aya: Yes.

 

Bhakta: How is that?

 

Aya: Where is Kali depicted to reside?

 

Bhakta: Usually She is shown to reside in the graveyard.

 

Aya: What is symbolized by the graveyard?

 

Bhakta: Death?

 

Aya: As such understand that one must die while alive to reach

Iraivan.

 

Bhakta: How is that possible? I don't get what you mean.

 

Aya: Look at this brick here. If I were to come after it with an axe,

will it run away?

 

Bhakta: No. How can it run? Ha,ha.

 

Aya: Why?

 

Bhakta: Because it is not conscious. It is not aware.

 

Aya: So it is called jadam. But if I were to come after you with an

axe

for sure you will run. Is that not so? The reason is due to awareness

proper. However so can it be said that you are not made of jadam? Your

body is made of jadam, just like this brick here. As such when one

dies

they will throw away the body to the pyre. So from here it is known

that it is the presence of the atma in the body which made one aware.

If the atma leaves the body, there will be no difference between you

and the brick. Yet can the atma function without the gross physical

body?

 

Bhakta: Maybe it could.

 

Aya: No, it can't. Now close your ears. (Bhakta closes ears). Can you

hear me?

 

(Bhakta shakes his head)

 

Aya: What happened?

 

Bhakta: I couldn't hear you clearly.

 

Aya: If you close your eyes can you see me?

 

Bhakta: No.

 

Aya: Hence it should be known that the atma can't perceive the

surroundings without the help of the gross fleshy body.

 

Now, let us do another simple demonstration. Stop your attention on

me.

Throw it on your surroundings. Can you hear the birds chirping?

 

Bhakta: Yes, I could hear it. I could also hear the ruffling of the

leaves.

 

Aya: Were they non-existent when I was talking to you just now, then

why weren't you able to listen?

 

Bhakta: My attention was on you.

 

Aya: Look. The eardrums vibrate with all sound from the surroundings.

This is a mechanical process. The eardrums don't vibrate selectively.

They vibrate when sound is around. Yet when the mind is not there, one

ceases to hear any surrounding sound even when it is registered by the

eardrum. Whenever the eardrum vibrates, it will send impulses to the

brain. This is also a mechanical process for it involves chemical

neurotransmitters alone. Now focus on another thing. Focus on your

leg.

Can you feel the sensation now?

 

Bhakta: Yes.

 

Aya: Was it not there before? Let us say that as we were talking

something bit your leg, will not you know of it?

 

Bhakta: I will.

 

Aya: As such it shows the impulses to be ever travelling to your

brain.

That is why you could react when something bit you even while talking

to me. These are all mechanical processes. They are all jadam in

nature, are they not so? Yet due to the mind being diverted one is not

aware of the impulses. This shows that it is the mind (consciousness)

which is paramount.

 

Bhakta: Yes, I guess.

 

Aya: Now listen to another thing. When you get sick what do you take?

 

Bhakta: Medication.

 

Aya: Is this medication dead or alive?

 

Bhakta: How could it be alive, it is an inanimate thing.

 

Aya: Yet this inanimate thing works on your body and cures you. So

understand that your body is jadam alone. But we know that jadam is an

inanimate thing. It is the presence of the atma which gives rise to

consciousness to it. When the consciousness is diverted or focussed

with

attention on one thing it doesn't even hear or is aware of the

surroundings, even when impulses are present.

 

Let me ask one more thing. How does one gain pleasure?

 

Bhakta: By the sense objects.

 

Aya: If one were to imagine eating a cake, will one get the taste or

is

it the real act of eating gives the taste?

 

Bhakta: It is the real act.

 

Aya: Just as one tastes sweetness from the tongue one needs the gross

fleshy organs to derive pleasure. Is this not so?

 

Bhakta: Yes.

 

Aya: However so can enjoyment be had without the presence of the mind?

 

Bhakta: How is that?

 

Aya: If one is in deep sorrow will one relish tasty food?

 

Bhakta: No.

 

Aya: If one is asleep or absent minded will one be able to enjoy

anything?

 

Bhakta: No.

 

Aya: Why?

 

Bhakta: The mind is missing.

 

 

Aya: So in truth the perceivance of pleasure

and pain is in the mind proper. And mind is attracted to pleasure

while

it rejects pain.

 

So understand that it is consciousness which is paramount. Yet at the

same time the jivatmas need jadam to exhibit its quality of

consciousness. It can't be aware of its surroundings without the body.

You asked me the meaning of dying while alive. Now listen to its

meaning. The jivatmas who have not attained mukthi cannot perceive,

think and enjoy nor exhibit any qualities of consciousness without the

help of the gross fleshy body. This is the Mayai. But for one who has

merged into OM, one is able to experience one's capacity of being able

to think, remember, perceive and so on with the help of the gross

fleshy body. This is done by disassociating the atma from the gross

fleshy body and merging into the OM. This disassociation is the death.

It is separating the atma from the body willfully. Ordinary beings

cannot do this. It only happens for them in death whereby they cannot

return to the world with their previous memories. Their old memories

die with them and they learn everything from scratch when they

reincarnate. It is not this death which is meant. The death that the

siddhars meant is the Samadhi death. It is where one merges into OM

and

realizes the quality of one's atma independent of the gross fleshy

body.

And one also experiences the great joy which is inherent in the atma.

But for the bonded jivatmas, these derive pleasure from sensual

objects

alone. Hence with death, they will again be embodied in the gross

physical body to again pursue pleasure. But as we have demonstrated,

pleasure is in one's mind proper. Though this could be deduced, it is

by realizing one's atmic nature it could be achieved. As such beings

who have not reached mukthi will be reincarnated again and again, even

after death. Only those who have died consciously (by entering OM)

will

escape this great cycle.

 

Bhakta: Okay, why then does Kali has a garland of arms in her hips?

 

Aya: What does the hands signify, what does the man do with his hands?

 

Bhakta: He does work?

 

Aya: Look around the world men have built, would this have been

possible without the hands?

 

Bhakta: No.

 

Aya: Hence of all creatures it is man who uses the hands nimbly and

produce much work. The other creatures can't do anything due to non

deft use of hand. It is by treating one's work (job) as one's

responsibility done in a sense of duty and sacrifice, without

expecting

any selfish returns, one inches towards Iraivan. As such we have the

saying, " Seiyum tolile deivam " (treat one's work as one's god). It

shows that one should work in the spirit of sacrifice, goodwill and

honesty. Yet one should not be attached to the fruits thereof. This

detachment is showed as the severed hands. Not only one's job, even

one's duty to one's parents, spouse, children, country etc should be

done likewise. One should surrender the fruits (good or bad) of one's

work to the Iraivan. The way to do this is not to tithe to some

temple.

It is by maintaining the attitude of sacrifice, duty, sincerity,

honesty and accountability (in one's work) is such achieved. A man who

works without this spirit is he who doesn't learn how to serve others.

This man will be a egomaniac alone. He does not know responsibility,

accountability nor honor. He doesn't know sacrifice either. His is a

tit for tat mentality. Can such a person inch towards Iraivan? He will

remain a moron proper. He who works for self profit alone can be a

good

businessman. But he who works for the upliftment of others (and sees

his job as a means to it) uplifts others, becomes a true inventor and

thereafter uplifts his own self. For this he must learn sacrifice

(severed hand), for it is the hand which is symbolized as work.

 

Bhakta: Why is Kali depicted in black?

 

Aya: Now close your eyes. (Bhakta closes eyes)

What do you see?

 

Bhakta: I see darkness only.

 

Aya: Where are you?

 

Bhakta: I am in this darkness.

 

Aya: Hence understand that jivatma who is still in Mayai is in

darkness

alone. This is the outer veil of Maya. One who is here will see

darkness closing one's eyes. Only when you have merged into OM you

will

see brightness as a million lightnings. This is the Akaya Gangai. This

outer veil is Kali's skin. Hence her skin is depicted as dark.

 

Bhakta: Why does she hold severed heads?

 

Aya: Close your eyes again. Imagine some form. Imagine a red ball. Or

imagine your close friend. Can you see the same?

 

Bhakta: Yes.

 

Aya: Now likewise close your ears. But now try to remember your

favorite song? Can you recall it?

 

Bhakta: Yes.

 

Aya: How was this possible?

 

Bhakta: By my mind?

 

Aya: When you imagined the ball and your friend, did you receive any

impulses from your eyes?

 

Bhakta: No.

 

Aya: Likewise when you recalled the song, did your ears receive any

such sound?

 

Bhakta: No.

 

Aya: Where did these images and sound appear to come from?

 

Bhakta: They appear to be in my head.

 

Aya: It is likewise in dreams. Hence understand that one is able to

think via namam (sound) and rupam (form) by the aid of one's mind. But

this is achieved with the help of one's brain only. Thus only did this

images and sound appear to be from your head. If there is injury to

your brain, or if I were to give some drugs which jeapordize the

activity of your brain, say sleeping tablets, what will happen?

 

Bhakta: I will not be able to think in the manner you have described.

 

Aya: So understand that one's essence is in one's head. Only one who

has attained mukthi overcomes the need to use the head (brain) for

achieving

the capacity of his mind. Hence the severed heads.

 

There is also another meaning. Anavam or selfish pride is symbolized

in one's head only. Hence only they call selfish, egoistic and proud

people as 'big headed' (as in English) or 'tale ganam' (as in Tamil).

This is a common metaphor. As such to sever one's anavam also is the

severed head. None can achieve the Iraivan by being bigoted, being

selfish and manipulative.

 

Bhakta: Why does the Kali stick out the tongue?

 

Aya: If I cut your tongue what will happen?

 

Bhakta: I can't talk thereafter.

 

Aya: So words or sound is actually symbolized by the tongue. In

dhyanam

one dwells on Iraivan by using the mantram which is sound only. It is

with the help of the mantram that the mind is quietened and focus

achieved. Thereafter one feels a sensation in the forehead. By

focussing one this forehead one experiences kumbhakam. Thereafter

one's

mind detaches from the jadam and merges into OM from base of spine.

Only after that it scales the OM and reaches to the top of OM. This is

also in one's head. It is called Sindhu. One achieves this feat with

the help of prana shakti. This prana shakti is from the air and is

mixed with blood. Hence Kali holds the severed head to symbolize

Sindhu

and catches the blood dripping from this head in a plate. This

symbolizes the help of prana shakti being concentrated to help one

scale OM. Initially one is not able to do this. The prana shakti

dissipates and one just experiences tremor and shaking.

 

Bhakta: But one experiences mudras also.

 

Aya: These are the reflection of the spiritual forms in OM. Unlike the

worldly forms, these do not dissipate. However so since the buddhi has

not merged into OM one does not have spontaneous knowledge of what the

mudras mean. One's hands, fingers and body takes this graceful forms

called as muthirai but one doesn't understand it. Only when the buddhi

has merged one will understand the inner meaning inherent in this

forms.

 

Bhakta: Why does one move and tremble initially?

 

Aya: It is because the mind is still attached to the physical body. It

is halfway into the OM and halfway in the physical body. Hence when it

moves upwards it reacts with the corresponding locus in one's physical

body. So the body does all this movements like the bharata natyam.

Sometimes one also gets belching, pain and so on due to overeaction of

these organs. It is because of concentration of shakti along these

alone. Only when one has detached the manam fully from the physical

body one will sit stock still.

 

And in order for all these processes to occur what was the preliminary

way the mind was concentrated?

 

Bhakta: By using the sound as mantram.

 

Aya: Hence the sound symbolized as the tongue. There is also one more

thing. One gains atma jnanam in full only after the manam has crossed

the region of neck. Initially the mind just reaches halfway and falls

down again. Only by crossing this neck region, one realizes the atmic

nature in full. To be precise this region is right above the palate of

the tongue. The manam comes out from the nape of the neck, enters the

back of the head (known as pidarikan) and comes till the palate of the

mouth above the tongue. Only then it jumps to Brahmarundram (in the

middle of head). It is here where one tastes in full the bliss of

satchtanandam.

It is only after one crosses the palate that the bliss of Iraivan

starts to

flow. This region is as corresponding to the physical body.

Hence only is this tongue jutted out to symbolize this fact. In fact

the bell they have in front of the temple symbolizes one's

uvulva. It also signifies the importance of mantram (by the sound of

the

bell). Man thinks deeply using sound alone.

The temple is symbolization of one's head proper.

 

Even for those who are just starting to experience partial merger into

OM, they experience this thing by their head falling backwards (as the

manam pulls the head from the neck), and the tongue coming out

involuntarily.

 

Bhakta: Why is Kali stepping on Shivan?

 

Aya: In what position is Shivan lying?

 

Bhakta: Like one who is sleeping.

 

Aya: If I stand on you what will happen?

 

Bhakta: I will groan in pain.

 

Aya: Is the Shivan doing such?

 

Bhakta: No.

 

Aya: That shows him to be sleeping alone. Only one who is asleep is

unaware of pain. Likewise the jivatmas are asleep to their true

nature.

They do not know the Iraivan nor the fact that the bliss is inside

them

and that they are indestructible. Due to this they are much attached

to

money, name, fame, pride and false religion. Hence they fight and

compete with each other for this. They also cling on to the temporary

pleasures and finally die without knowing anything.

 

Moreover if I were to stand on top of you with all my weight, what

will

happen?

 

Bhakta: I will get crushed.

 

Aya: Not only that..what you ate will come out through your mouth and

anus too.

 

Likewise the worldly is obsessed with skin deep beauty only. Is there

any one who loves a skeleton, a heart or intestines? Yet right beneath

one there is only blood, bile, urine and faeceas. Only this is covered

up by skin. Yet man is much attached to this body and loses his pranam

through all his orifices. Finally when the prana shakti leaves him

altogether he will die only. Yet man again and again incarnates into

this world and enjoys this world which in truth is mere straw. It is

not lasting. In one's old age all will abandon one. The world has no

time for the old people. These sit alone and reminiscence their past

glory. None has time for these. Finally they will get diseased and

senile alone. Such is the state of man. Hence in truth the final

outcome of the world in Mayai is pain (of death) alone. It is

symbolized as the pain one will get if another stands on top of one.

Yet the worldly let the Mayai step on them and are blissfully ignorant

of the pain of the world. The tigress of time will finally seize their

head and crush it with death. All are moving towards death alone.

Remember this well.

 

Though we have said much are the worldly going to search for jnanam?

They are rooted in the world proper. None moves in search of jnanam.

Many mistaken learned erudition as jnanam also. So these are the

stagnant fools.

 

Bhakta: Just as one becomes immovable if a heavy thing were to stand

upon one.

 

Aya: Yes. The Mayai stands on one's head. Hence one doesn't seek

liberation and comes again and again to this transitory world. One

can't move from this plane. One remains stagnant.

 

One can choose to be in the world of Mayai or Vidyai. One can choose

to

act as the lord or be with the lord.

 

Bhakta: How is that?

 

Aya: This world only has time for winners. It has got no time for

losers. It is survival of the fittest. So if one wants to become like

the lord (the winner), one will have to remain in the world of Mayai.

But

remember, Mayai means duality. There can't be success without

failure. There

can't be happiness without pain. When one desires pleasure it is

because the

mind knows what it doesn't like only. This is the pain. And for one

to succeed

another must fail. Men are made of different skills. If all were of

equal

capacity will there be any winners? And does one recognize a menial

labor (like

sweeping) just as one recognizes the capacity to do surgery (as a

doctor)? Hence

can a factory operator expect to be paid as much as a surgeon?

 

Look, the world is competition alone. It is competing for resources.

Resources

as oil, land, produce and extractible of land and raw materials are

limited. As

the population grows more will compete for the limited resource.

Thereafter

man's darker side will get the better of him. If not nature itself

will devise a

way to annihilate population. Understand the limitation of Mayai. For

many

births one has enjoyed this transitory life. Unlimited are the atmas.

Let these

enjoy the world.

 

Rare itself is a human birth. Rare still is passion towards

spirituality. Rarer

still is upadesam from a brahmajnani. Even after getting all these if

one

doesn't make use of it, only oneself should be blamed.

 

Bigot: I have a question?

 

Aya: Ah...I thought you will never ask. You were silent throughout the

conversation.

 

Bigot: I read in some scriptures that Kali juts out her tongue out of

shame for

stepping on her husband.

 

Aya: Where is my stick ?@#!

 

--------- THE END --------

 

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