Namajapa became a habit with me

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Namajapa became a habit with me By G.N.Ambalavayal in Oct 1968 This writer is not a non-believer. He grew up in an atmosphere which nurtured belief in God and Bhakthi. Yet, may be, due to lack of virtuous deeds in previous life and excessive sins committed, I had no interest in divine matters, in Namajapa or hearing sacred stories, although I had enough opportunities to do so. On the other hand, my mother was so absorbed in bhakthi that her happiness in life lay in worshipping Lord Guruvayurappan. I first visited Guruvayur in 1962. Thereafter, till 1966 I was not lucky enough to visit the place. It was during this interval that I was subjected to suffering – which is the subject matter of this story. In 1964 and 1965 summer, a small wound in my leg due to chappal bite became unbearable because of excessive itching and discharge of pus. I tried some minor treatment, but

there was no improvement. It reappeared in the third year in February 1996. I went to Kozhikode Medical College Hospital and consulted a skin specialist there. He said it was only a minor ailment due to allergy and advised me not to wear leather footwear. Accordingly I took medicine, but the treatment did not make any difference and the problem only aggravated when I wore chappals. I lost peace of mind and went to a medical laboratory in Kozhikode to get blood, urine etc. tested. But the report indicated nothing wrong and there was no explanation as to how there was no cure. I referred the matter again back to the Government Hospital at my place. The doctor heard the history of the disease, treatment etc. and advised me to try allopathic treatment once again. I took strictly tablets and injection, and applied ointment. Yet there was not only no cure but it spread to other parts of the leg, and hand too. When the itching sensation began, I used to rub the spot with whatever came handy. Then, unable to bear the subsequent pain I shouted. Since both the palms became reddish and started burning, it became impossible even to take care of my daily needs and I had to depend on others. I could not even take meals myself. It was in this helpless situation, I started thinking with tears in my eyes how I came to suffer like this.

Narayana! I got the answer immediately. It was nothing else; I simply forgot Bhagavan and to chant his Names. Even being a Hindu, I did not take care to light a lamp at sunset at home nor chant Narayana. I took my illness both as a punishment (for not thinking of the Almighty and praying to Him all these days) and blessing(I started Namajapa). I prayed to the Lord to forgive all my sins. Due to repentance, tears were flowing from my eyes. I took an oath that never again I would neglect God and His names. As though prompted by God Himself, I had occasion to go to Kozhikode again within the next two, three days. There I consulted an Ayurvedic doctor who was my relative. He decided the line of treatment and accordingly I bought all the medicines. Since I was determined to depend only on the Lord, I also purchased a photo of Guruvayurappan and took it along with me. Then and there I felt as if half my sickness had disappeared.

In a repentant mood, I spend my days praying and thinking of God’s kindness towards His devotees. Gradually there was improvement and eventually I was cured. I decided to go to Guruvayur and rejoin my duty only after worshipping the Lord there and paying my respects to Anjam Thirumeni. Thus, after 1962, it was only on July 3,1966 that this sinner was lucky enough to be present at the Deeparadhana of the Lord. I did not find words as to what to pray. I simply reveled in the beautiful image and shed tears standing near the mandapa before the sanctum. I stood speechless, palms joined. Thereafter I took part in the namajapa conducted in Kuthambalam. The more I thought of the Lord’s mercy, the more I shed tears of joy. Thereafter I went to Narayanalayam and made obeisance to Thirunamacharya. I told him how I could not come to Guruvayur so long due to my sins and how I repented. Then the saint said: “ When Bhagavan does not see His bhaktas, He gives some pain to them and make them come over to Him. Such is the glory of Lord Guruvayurappan. You need not grieve. The Lord has taken on Himself all your problems. Go on chanting His names. At least once a year make it a point to

come to Guruvayur and see Bhagavan”.He said this patting on my back and giving Prasad. The next day also I had Nirmalya Darshanam at 3 a.m. when the sanctum sanctorum was opened. I witnessed Vakacharthu, Malar Nivedyam etc. After noon puja, I returned to my place praying that I should soon visit the temple again. I told all news to my wife. We decided that from then on we would never do anything without remembering Bhagavan and chanting His names. After this I never had any problem in the leg. Not only that, even if I told someone that I had such a disease no one would believe. My next trip to Guruvayur was in Dec 1967 with my family members. The speech I heard that evening from Sadguru still rings in my ears. He said: “ After coming to Guruvayur and having had the darshan don’t worry yourself asking what you got. Come on, take this – the Kamadhenu of Narayana nama and bring it up – all your wishes would be fulfilled. Don’t fail to do Namajapa because of pressure of work, you can do it even while working. Catch hold of the name and don’t feel shy, go on chanting”. This speech awakened me and now it has become a habit with me to utter Lord’s names every minute and every breath. Due to various reasons I could not visit Guruvayur as often as I would wish to. Sometimes, I feel disappointed about this, but I continue with my Namajapa The above was a real experience of our Bhagavan’s grace narrated by a reader of the “Sri Guruvayurappan”–a monthly magazine of the Sri Guruvayurappan Sankeerthana Trust, founded by Thirunamacharya Shri Anjam Madhavan Nambudiri (1918-1988), a scholar devotee who held vast audiences spellbound by his inimitable discourses on Bhagavata and the Namasankirtan. I request all our group members(who are rs of the “Sri Guruvayurappan” monthly magazine) to provide me with the scanned pages of “Anubhava Katha” columns. I wish to translate it into English so that we all can be blessed by knowing more and more about our Guruvayurappan’s Karunyam. So, if any of you out there has any volume, any month, any year-old or new issues, kindly help me in this project by sending those pages to me. I also wish to make a website for sharing these blessings of Lord Guruvayurappan with the world. So, I request all our group members to send their divine experiences to me – in English, Malayalam or Manglish(Malayalam typed out in English). Please share how you were blessed by Lord Guruvayurappan - how He answered your prayers, how He saved you from danger, how He healed you, how His grace protected you, how He fulfilled your wishes, how He appeared before you etc. The Glory of Lord Guruvayurappan is such that all of us can be blessed by recounting His

leelas.

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