How to control anger,anxiety ? when things are not in our control?

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How to control anger,anxiety when things are not in our control?Vineeta Ujlan----Shree Hari Ram RamVineetaji, please see attached responses from a similar previous posting. FromGita Talk Moderators, Ram Ram----

NEW POSTING

Anger and anxiety dissolve/vanish when you are one with everything....

One has to just understand the true self.....and its happy natural state....

 

Understand "doership"......basic cause of our anger and anxiety....

All you have to do is be a non-doer.....

Sushil Jain

 

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Shree Hari Ram Ram

The reason for Anger is Desire. True desire is "this should happenor that should not happen". When things do not happen according to our desires,we become angry. Also, desiring things a certain way, increases our pride andin turn our anger. Let go pride, to let go anger. When we expect others tofollow what we say, we are insisting on the "end outcome" (phala), which is notour right according to Gita 2/47. Meera Das, Ram Ram

 

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-Shree Hari-First of all, our emotions are born of our three gunas.Thus referring to Bhagavad Gita Ch. 1423. He who, seated like one unconcerned, is not moved by the qualities, and who,knowing that the qualities are active, is self-centered and moves not,24. Alike in pleasure and pain, who dwells in the Self, to whom a clod of earth,stone and gold are alike, to whom the dear and the unfriendly are alike, firm,the same in censure and praise,25. The same in honour and dishonour, the same to friend and foe, abandoning allundertakings—he is said to have crossed the qualities.Swamiji expands on these shlokas dealing with ones response to otherson page 1572 in Sadhaka Sanjivani (English)third and fourth paragraphs.So now I would like consider some associated thoughts regarding anger,anxiety,and I would like to add depression commonly associated with anxiety.Quite often there is a chemical imbalance in the brain, in the case of anxietyand depression, would need one our medical brethren to comment on anger.(Onreflection people with uncontrollable temper tantrums are often medicated)OK I suppose we have all heard of the plethora of medications that work on thebrain.There are 26000 plus people out there viewing this Satsang, the silent majoritywho follow the debates.Many would say, I need these drugs to bring things into balance, words are fine,you would not be so smug if you suffer as I do.Well I most certainly did Brothers and Sisters, my chemicals were shot, and yesit is a living hell. So let me 'talk turkey', seizures, convulsions, panicattacks, depression, (Who wouldn't be depressed with that lot?) So what drugs amI on 'NONE'.How? I turned to GOD for help, at soul level I knew help was there, I cried outto HIM from my soul!Yes on medication for a short while! But take on the responsibility for yourcondition, 'DO SOMETHING FOR YOURSELF', seek out a spiritual group, not onesthat want your money, but ones that want only to give you Divine Love.(For oneday you may be able to give such Love)!Meditate....Meditate.... Meditate....Look the demons in the face, ride thetiger.And understand something, metaphorically, really think on this, "Your sufferingcould be the birth pains of your spiritual emergence!"I could supply more information if needed.Om... Shanti...Mike Keenor

 

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The emergency brake is repetition of manthram and the regular practice ofmeditation helps one to permanently transform ones consciousness for the better.

 

Vispi Jokhi

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PRIOR POSTING

Shree HariRam RamPriya Sadhak, prashana ke liye dhanyavad!Based on Swamiji Mahatraj's teaching, there are several ways to deal with this:1. We are reminded in Gita that we should remember God at the last breath sincewhatever our last thought is, that is what we become in next life. Rarely, itcan happen by God's grace, but generally, it is not possible unless we are inthe habit of repeating God's name all the time.2. The whole universe is pervaded by God, there is nothing else but Him ineverything and everywhere, whatever we may be associated with. If we do allactions with a loving attitude as a dedicated service, as an offering to God,then it changes the whole setting, this applies to - what we think, what wesee, what we feel, what we do, what we talk, what we eat or drink etc., thenit becomes a worship, we do not need a separate time for prayer or worship.3. We need to closely examine the root cause of the anger in a given situation.Ordinarily, it is cited that the cause for anger is obstructed desire for thematerial things, persons or situations but Swamiji Maharaj summarises it:The real problem is when we have the desire "what we want should happen" and"what we do not want should not happen". Right at the outset there is aconflict, we are asking for the impossible since other people want their way tooat the same time, how can then the oppositre things happen in a given setting.4. Scriptures remind us again and again that we should not look for faults inothers, we cannot remove their faults anyway, it is possible we may developthese faults ourselves. If they want to remove their faults they can. Instead weshould attempt to remedy our own faults.5. No one is responsible for giving us pain even though we may think that to bethe case. What we get in terms of good fortune or bad fortune, money, children,life partner, situations and circumstances is a result of our prarabhdha only.No one else is to be blamed for it. The wise person looks within himserlf foranswers.6. In order to get rid of the anger we have to let go of the "Agrah", my way orhighway, Swamiji says, if we do what the others want, it would make them happy,it can turn out to be relaxing experience for ourselves too, it is easier on oursystem, stress free, a win win situation. Agreed, it certainly is a blow to ourego, the Ahamkar is Asuric vriti and is at root of majority of problems ininterpersonal relationships.7. Last resort is to pray to God saying "Hey Nath, I cannot handle it, havetried everything within my power, pls. come to my rescue, you are my onlysaviour.Pranam!Madan KauraReferences: Jivan-upyogi Parbachan & Amrit Bindu by Swami Ramsukhdasdji, Gita2-55, 2-62/63, 3-36/37!---------I have some humble suggestions ...1. Anger comes from unfulfilled desires and expectations. Since we feelincomplete, we try to fill it will desires. May be your needs and desires havegone up after marriage because of some social and cultural changes and your mindis more scattered as your responsibilities have gone up. We all go thru thisand this is very normal. The key is to analyze your mind and its movement. Theantidote comes in several forms - not to envy others and their possessions,thinking good for everybody, broadening your mind, try to see your own faultbefore blaming others, looking at a scenario from an independent standpoint,acknowledging own mistakes etc. The other thing is that the more you have themore you need. So, try to be happy with whatever you have. We will all get onlythat much we are supposed to get. However, try hard. Lastly, repeating thename of God will completely mold your mind.2. Arguments comes to us because we think we know it better than others and isrooted in our EGO. Again, you need to do self-analysis. Learn to respecteverybody and see the presence of God (hidden) in them. Even if you arecorrect, listen to others with due respect. You can always have a difference inopinion but at the end what matters is how much respect you have paid to theother party and if you are you listening their viewpoint carefully. SwamiVivekananda never accepted anything before verifying its truth. Argument shouldnever spoil the relationship.Finally, if you still can't control, leave the scene, breath some fresh air ortell your mind to shut up.Hope this helps.Ramanuj Bhattacharya-------Hari Ohm,Almost half a century back I was given two tools to control anger and I havebenefited immensely by these two tools. I will share this with you. You maytry it and I am positive you will start getting results --(a) When you get angry, make it a point to shut your mouth and start chanting"Ram Ram" say 36 or 108 times... slowly ... by the time you reach the count,you will find that you can express yourself more calmly than shouting in anger.(b) Have soft music -- bhajans, devotional songs, molodious classical music --played at home and start listening to music and also practice singing along withthe music... don't worry about lack of training... you are not performing for aconcert audience but for you and Lord Ram... Sing in the shower, sing in thekitchen, sing in the drawing room, hum while walking, while cleaning vessels,... keep on singing and humming... this is the best medicine for anger.© Dr.Balamurali Krishna has rendered the entire 18 chapters of Gita in amusical manner. If you can get the tapes and listen to it, in a short while youwill get to memorise the whole Gita... what better way than this!With love to all.... May He Bless Us All!Venkatraman----Lot of times the anger is a direct creation of greed. One should learn andpractice to becoming little more content. This can and does bring peace toyou.Hope it helps.Surendra Gupta---RAM RAM JIWHILE DOING ANY WORK ALWAYS REMEMBER RAM JI & RECITE RAM RAM constantly from theheart.THANKSGDMEHTA---GITA TALK GROUP GUIDELINES: PLEASE -FOR QUESTIONER1. The questions as far as possible must be relevant to Gita, relevant toDharma, relavant to other scriptures and relevant to motivate Sadhaks to take upspiritual path2. The Questioner must commit to daily Gita study3. Only one question at a time.4. Question must be brief, to the point and relevant to the group's primary aimof deeper understanding of Gita.GITA TALK GROUP GUIDELINES for RESPONDER: PLEASE -1. Only responses that further clarify Gita message will be posted.2. Quote Gitaji/scriptures wherever possible.3. Limit personal feelings, opinions, beliefs etc. to the extent that theyfurther help in understanding the Gita shlokas4. Be as concise, to the point, respecting sadhaka's time.5. Focus on subject at hand only.6. Do not include links to the other sites; personal information (Ph #, addressetc) or personalize message to particular person7. All responses may not be posted and moderator at his discretion, may modifythe posting.8. Please keep in mind novices, youth, westerners, non-sectarian audience. Limitthe use to Sanskrit words and provide English word bracketed.MODERATORRam Ram------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------Post message: Subscribe: - Unsubscribe: -