Guest guest Posted April 27, 2002 Report Share Posted April 27, 2002 Da Free John: The root of spirituality is not some activity like desire that seeks to get you to the super-Object. Genuine spirituality is understanding of the whole process of motivation. It is to re-cognize the root of it - this contraction, this separation. When you no longer have any more options, when you have worn yourself out doing your number, and you have tried all the trips and methods, paths and lifestyles, strategies and places to go, all the forms of concentration, whatever they are, then all of that begins to break down. You discover that you just don't have the " jazz " left to really carry it on anymore. You find yourself more depressed, just a little bit too much depressed to meditate or to hunt for sex. You just don't have the jazz, the necessary fire of motivation. Then upsetness begins to overwhelm you. The crisis begins to come on. You don't really have a path (or a strategy) anymore. You may talk a lot about it, feel a lot about it. It remains a part of your mind, but you don't really " have " a path (or a strategy) any longer. That is really the most hopeful sign. The ego is begiinning to rot! When fruit begins to rot, then it falls with seed into the earth. But as long as one is very righteous, as long as one has got one's " trip " , one is not ripe. It is only when the trip begins to kick you in the face that you begin to soften up, bruise a little bit, feel your fear, your suffering, your dilemma, this constant upset of all your mortality. We are all going to die. We are all going to lose this present awareness, this present enjoyment. I can't endure that dilemma from day to day. From the moment I was born, that upset me. I wsn't the least interested in tolerating moment to moment existence as that kind of suffering. Life wasn't worth the involvement if its summation had to be death, zero. What difference does it make how turned on I can get if I must fall out the bottom, arbitrarily. Everything is wonderful today. But you wake up tomorrow and the world of lovely friends is delivered to you dead, the insane parcels of everything disappearing. So all righteousness, all ordinary spirituality, all the search for consolation, is nonsense. It is a refusal. It is unreal. The usual perception is that of the agonizing fact of identification, the act that is ego, this refusal of one another, this lovelessness, and this living craziness. And all of your ordinary processes are bound up with that craziness, until you begin to get sick of it. Then you are no longer talking about your trip, your Yoga, how groovy it is and how you're going to get there, " everything is so soul-beautiful " , and all this crap. You will become obsessed with your darkness, your heaviness. You will try to feel good, but you know you feel lousy. You really feel upset. It is really bad. It is really an annoyance. You are only upset, so what difference does the search make? If you go through that long enough, you begin really to get upset, and your meditation becomes concentration on your upset. Whereas before you were always doing your number to avoid that upset, now you can't do anything but be upset. And while you are meditating on your upsetness, you happen to get involved here, in this Ashram, and you get even more and more upset all the time. You come to me, and I make you more upset. You think you are supposed to be having a very groovy spiritual experience here, becoming more and more turned on. But when you come around, people yell at you. They call your attention to your crazy number. You are trying to do your best, but everybody is hitting you over the head. All such experience is very aggravating, but it begins to reinforce the real meditaiton that has now started to go on in you. It is this crisis, this falling apart, this rot. And it will persist, until you beging to observe, somehow this activity of yours. When you begin to see what you are doing, when you begin to re-cognize it, you will it first of all in very direct, human terms. You will see it in the simple, human, practical things that you do. Later, you will begin to see it in subtler terms. You will observe the whole quality of your mind, your ordinary activity, your game, the drama, the event that is always going on, until you begin to see it most precisely and very subtly. When you see it absolutely, that is " radical " understanding. When you see the thing itself, the simple thing, that is the end of it. You fall apart. You scream, or you can't say anything, but it just ends. All of a sudden, the whole process is not going on anymore. And this apparent event, unlike all other apparent forms of action in the manifested worlds, is not followed by a re-action. -- Happy Days, Judi http://www.users.uniserve.com/~samuel/judi-1.htm TheEndOfTheRopeRanch http://www.livingston.net/allison/sacred01.htm Rev. Helen Hiwater, D.D. ... " Straighten up and bow down! There's nooooo way around it! " Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2002 Report Share Posted April 28, 2002 snip, snipping Da Da > We are all going to die. We are all going to lose this present > awareness, this present enjoyment. I can't endure that dilemma from day > to day. The fact is, you're dying right now. Not only that, you never really arrived in the first place, to complain about it! Right now is the moment of my death, as real as can be. So -- no time for me to compute all your sayings, or all your names. If it's all the same to you, I've got no time for your instructions and statements about the way it is! :-) Today is a good day to die! Heya! :-) Dan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2002 Report Share Posted April 28, 2002 > **** Heya! :-) What do they call those Russian dancers with their arms > across their chest and legs shooting out? Heya!! :-)) I dunno. Nicolai and Yvgeni? Anyway, dey sure do! Heya! :-)) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2002 Report Share Posted April 28, 2002 dan330033 wrote: > > > Today is a good day to die! > > Heya! > > :-) > Dan > **** Heya! :-) What do they call those Russian dancers with their arms across their chest and legs shooting out? Heya!! :-)) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2002 Report Share Posted April 28, 2002 The present becomes the past every second. The present becomes the future every second. We are constantly dying and constantly being reborn. Will your path change when the vehicle (body) dies? It's up to you. Gelf Never be pessimistic: It is not going to work anyhow. ---- Realization Sunday, April 28, 2002 3:43:32 PM Realization Re: The Humpty Dumpty Story snip, snipping Da Da> We are all going to die. We are all going to lose this present> awareness, this present enjoyment. I can't endure that dilemma from day> to day. The fact is, you're dying right now.Not only that, you never really arrived in the first place,to complain about it!Right now is the moment of my death,as real as can be.So -- no time for me to compute all your sayings,or all your names.If it's all the same to you, I've got no time for your instructions and statements about the way it is! :-)Today is a good day to die!Heya!:-)Dan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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