Guest guest Posted April 12, 2003 Report Share Posted April 12, 2003 Well Tanya, I just know youre going to love this one .. I personally would give them a hug, and tell them they are doing just fine ... then talk to them and let them express to me what it is they want. Often in simply vocalising this, they will then act on it. More often though, not. And if I am of humble ego, I have to accept this, and simply support them in their pain, offering them compassion, and understanding. Letting them know someone does care. And ... very important .. have no expectation of them, or you will surely be disappointed. Voilence begets voilence .. end of story. I wouldnt take a chance on slapping them, it might just push them over the edge (and thats why I think Judi is so brave, and clever, and so devious) to a place where they wont tell anyone what theyre going through, and I know from personal experience, sometimes all I need is someone to listen to me. Judi doesnt listen, she attacks. Hahahaha .. that is a good one Tanya, I should thank Judi? ... for what? hugs to you Tanya .. deb x x x > Hi all, > > OK, so you're walking along, minding your own business when you > happen to trip over someone who is deeply asleep. You can tell just > by looking at them that they've swallowed so much crap they are about > to slip into a coma from which they will probably never recover. > > What do you do? > Sing them a lullaby? Feed them some more crap? Or give them a good > slapping? > > It seems to me that Judi is very good at slapping people right where > it hurts - and surely the more pain caused the less likely someone is > to go on sleeping. > > What thanks does she get? Just a load of whining: > " leave me alone, that hurt " > " just 'cause you're awake that doesn't mean the rest of us want to be " > " I'm having a really great dream here and I want to tell all the > other dreamers about how great and superior my dream is so they will > all approve of me " > " I'm dreaming that I'm awake and that's much more comfortable than > actually having to open my eyes " > > zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz... > > Tanya Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 13, 2003 Report Share Posted April 13, 2003 Hi Deb, Blessings and light on you this wonderful morning! Thanks for the little lecture on 'how to help people' by the ego. Realization , " deb " <willett@h...> wrote: > Well Tanya, I just know youre going to love this one .. > > I personally would give them a hug, and tell them they are doing just fine > .. then talk to them and let them express to me what it is they want. Often > in simply vocalising this, they will then act on it. More often though, not. > And if I am of humble ego, I have to accept this, and simply support them in > their pain, offering them compassion, and understanding. Letting them know > someone does care. > > And ... very important .. have no expectation of them, or you will surely be > disappointed. This certainly got me thinking. I read it to my partner and she said " but that's what you do all the time " and it is, to some extent. I am currently supporting three recovering alcoholics in their work to stop drinking and stay stopped. This means helping them to completely change their mindset, give up all guilt, resentments etc, etc...its a long, hard and very demanding process. I spend several hours a week with each of them doing this as well as being on call night and day prepared to do what I can for them or their families. I go to seven meeting a week, each one taking about 2-3 hours of my time, not because I need them to stay sober, but because I need to be there for others as they were there for me. Some of the people I need to be there for are the kind of folks many people wouldn't give the time of day to, people who've lost everything. I co-ordinate public information for AA in my county, which involves organising volunteers to do presentations in schools, colleges, hospitals, prisons etc, etc...I get some petrol money for this but everything else is completely voluntary. Am I saying that my life is self-less? No way. I recognise that this is all self-centred activity - I do it because it makes me feel good. I do it because I can't think of anything more *rewarding* to do with my time. It just makes me smile to see that I am doing all this and call myself selfish while you sit on your ranch preening yourself and talking about what a generous spirit you are. The difference is that these people come to me for specific help - they want to know how to live without drinking. Here we all come, presumably because we want to talk about enlightenment and for that we need to take things a bit further, for that we need to cut even more of the crap than these poor piss heads do. For that I need people like Judi - to show me where I'm going - which is nowhere, and people like you - to show me where I came from, which is hell. > Voilence begets voilence .. end of story. I wouldnt take a chance on > slapping them, it might just push them over the edge (and thats why I think > Judi is so brave, and clever, and so devious) to a place where they wont > tell anyone what theyre going through, and I know from personal experience, > sometimes all I need is someone to listen to me. Judi doesnt listen, she > attacks. > Hahahaha .. that is a good one Tanya, I should thank Judi? ... for what? > > hugs to you Tanya .. deb x x x For her completely *selfless* efforts of course ! One way or another, we're all in this together, Thanks for your energy, Tanya x. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.