Guest guest Posted May 18, 2003 Report Share Posted May 18, 2003 > Hi Deb, Good morning Paul )> > thanks for responding! > > i have responded to your questions, Paul > > Have you got/had a pivotal emotional experience in> > your life recently Paul which may have triggered> > this trough of yours? > > Yes, my lover broke with me and moved out and got with> a married man whom she has since married. Okay here we're getting to the grist of it .. you have a broken heart, and because you are a spiritual person seeking to live your life as an expression of love (are you?), the results of this heart break are a hundred times more painful than if it happened to your average Joe. > > My only advice to you is sit> > and wait, go with the flow and know you will be okay> > .. get lots of rest, drink heaps of water, take> > plenty of time to yourself and let your thoughts run> > wild .. what do you feel you need to do about this?> > That is the problem, I have no answer. And I grow> weary of waiting, I don't know how much longer I can> last. Thats an awful feeling, not having any answers. You just feel so powerless to do anything. So you dont .. do anything at all. And this does not help your cause to find wholeness again, because motivation goes right out the door. But you are doing exactly what is right, taking the time to absord and come to terms with your loss. I got through it by focusing on my need to develop PATIENCE .. taking one day at a time, without expecting miracles. You wont see any results on a daily basis, and may even think youre not making any progress, but little things will slot in here and there until one day you will find yourself laughing again. > > Do you feel you need a healer, or a guru .. what> > feels right for you now?> > Nothing feel right for me anymore. I don't know what> to do. I am so miserable and nothing soothes me. I> have lost me, something inside is gone and I don't> feel I can get it back while I am still in this life. I think its a good thing nothing feels right for you any more. You are on the verge of bringing a new "you" to birth. What doesnt kill you makes you stronger right?> > Who told you it was a malfunctory Kundalini> > awakening??? I say to you it was exactly as it> > needed to be. The only way you can ever have a> > lifetime of depression is if you decide to have it,> > quit blaming the kundalini! )> > I don't want a lifetime of depression, I have tried so> hard to make me feel positive to no avail. Something> is broken in me, and it refused to get fixed. I don't> want to be this way but I can't do anything about it. > I have tried so hard to be happy, joyful, positive,> but it won't work. I can't hardly take it anymore, it> is killing me. I feel I am rotting away. There's nothing you can do, there's nothing I can say ... the only thing that will work here is: give it time. Yes the old you is rotting away and it hurts, letting go always does. In letting go of your lover, you also had to let go of dreams, hopes and expectations and at the moment you have nothing to replace them with. But soon, with careful attention on your part by allowing yourself to experience those depths of despair ie. let them out, express them, cry, scream, headbang, seek the I thought, do whatever you need to do, eventually they will be replaced with hope and laughter. So Paul .. hang in there .. keep in touch and let us have your worst thoughts if you can handle writing them down, it will help you to write about it. blessings and safe journey .. deb x x x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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