Guest guest Posted November 12, 2004 Report Share Posted November 12, 2004 When you discover you are encased or entombed in this mechanical mass of flesh. I remember as a child the disbelief that I was this " stuff " a machine of blood and guts. It was such a terror that I didn't know how I could live as such. My life, me, was dependent by such a thing. For two weeks I was an anxious basket case. Now I feel like it is a prison and I am at the mercy of it's jokes and cruelty. Lately this anxiety has returned, I suspect it never left, to torment me around my 40th birthday. Everyday I find " me " in a different environment of mind. Sometimes it is pleasant like laying in a hammock on a warm summer day listening to the birds and children play. Other days it is terrifying like someone who is scared of heights being dangled from the top of a skyscraper. Not to be let go, just dangled. How I appreciate those hammock days like you wouldn't believe. This is however providing me with a crash course of me vs. mind although I think I would have preferred the longer way although I wasn't as diligent as I could be when I feel ok. The urgency is just not there. How do we manage to live like this? How do we see others dying around us and not completely lose it? The animals do it but I believe they don't know the separation we do. The cruel joke is that we are just conscious enough to know the death terror but not conscious enough to transcend it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2004 Report Share Posted November 13, 2004 Nisargadatta , " Shawn " <shawnregan> wrote: > > When you discover you are encased or entombed in this mechanical > mass of flesh. I remember as a child the disbelief that I was > this " stuff " a machine of blood and guts. It was such a terror that > I didn't know how I could live as such. My life, me, was dependent > by such a thing. For two weeks I was an anxious basket case. > Now I feel like it is a prison and I am at the mercy of it's jokes > and cruelty. Lately this anxiety has returned, I suspect it never > left, to torment me around my 40th birthday. Everyday I find " me " in > a different environment of mind. Sometimes it is pleasant like > laying in a hammock on a warm summer day listening to the birds and > children play. Other days it is terrifying like someone who is > scared of heights being dangled from the top of a skyscraper. Not to > be let go, just dangled. How I appreciate those hammock days like > you wouldn't believe. > This is however providing me with a crash course of me vs. mind > although I think I would have preferred the longer way although I > wasn't as diligent as I could be when I feel ok. The urgency is just > not there. > How do we manage to live like this? How do we see others dying > around us and not completely lose it? The animals do it but I > believe they don't know the separation we do. The cruel joke is that > we are just conscious enough to know the death terror but not > conscious enough to transcend it. P: Ya going thru puberty again. They call it a middle-age crisis. Go to the Doc get some hormones. Get a 20 years old to take for moonlight rides around the vocano in your new Thunderbird convertible. That sort of thing. ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2004 Report Share Posted November 13, 2004 Nisargadatta , " Shawn " <shawnregan> wrote: > > When you discover you are encased or entombed in this mechanical > mass of flesh. I remember as a child the disbelief that I was > this " stuff " a machine of blood and guts. It was such a terror that > I didn't know how I could live as such. My life, me, was dependent > by such a thing. For two weeks I was an anxious basket case. > Now I feel like it is a prison and I am at the mercy of it's jokes > and cruelty. Lately this anxiety has returned, I suspect it never > left, to torment me around my 40th birthday. Everyday I find " me " in > a different environment of mind. Sometimes it is pleasant like > laying in a hammock on a warm summer day listening to the birds and > children play. Other days it is terrifying like someone who is > scared of heights being dangled from the top of a skyscraper. Not to > be let go, just dangled. How I appreciate those hammock days like > you wouldn't believe. > This is however providing me with a crash course of me vs. mind > although I think I would have preferred the longer way although I > wasn't as diligent as I could be when I feel ok. The urgency is just > not there. > How do we manage to live like this? How do we see others dying > around us and not completely lose it? The animals do it but I > believe they don't know the separation we do. The cruel joke is that > we are just conscious enough to know the death terror but not > conscious enough to transcend it. Death, what is that? You have only been in contact with death through your memory. And that memory is timeless. So, death is just a word. And the terror you are experiencing is just a mind projection, like pure awareness dipped in dirty mud of fearful memories. Are you sure that you will die? Are you absolutely sure that you will die? /AL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2004 Report Share Posted November 13, 2004 Nisargadatta , " anders_lindman " <anders_lindman> wrote: > > Nisargadatta , " Shawn " <shawnregan> wrote: > > > > When you discover you are encased or entombed in this mechanical > > mass of flesh. I remember as a child the disbelief that I was > > this " stuff " a machine of blood and guts. It was such a terror that > > I didn't know how I could live as such. My life, me, was dependent > > by such a thing. For two weeks I was an anxious basket case. > > Now I feel like it is a prison and I am at the mercy of it's jokes > > and cruelty. Lately this anxiety has returned, I suspect it never > > left, to torment me around my 40th birthday. Everyday I find " me " in > > a different environment of mind. Sometimes it is pleasant like > > laying in a hammock on a warm summer day listening to the birds and > > children play. Other days it is terrifying like someone who is > > scared of heights being dangled from the top of a skyscraper. Not to > > be let go, just dangled. How I appreciate those hammock days like > > you wouldn't believe. > > This is however providing me with a crash course of me vs. mind > > although I think I would have preferred the longer way although I > > wasn't as diligent as I could be when I feel ok. The urgency is just > > not there. > > How do we manage to live like this? How do we see others dying > > around us and not completely lose it? The animals do it but I > > believe they don't know the separation we do. The cruel joke is that > > we are just conscious enough to know the death terror but not > > conscious enough to transcend it. > > Death, what is that? You have only been in contact with death through > your memory. And that memory is timeless. So, death is just a word. > And the terror you are experiencing is just a mind projection, like > pure awareness dipped in dirty mud of fearful memories. Are you sure > that you will die? Are you absolutely sure that you will die? > > /AL P: Are you absolutely sure that you exist? Have you ever inquire into existing? Have you inquire into what being sure means? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2004 Report Share Posted November 13, 2004 Nisargadatta , " cerosoul " <Pedsie2@a...> wrote: > > Nisargadatta , " anders_lindman " > <anders_lindman> wrote: > > > > Nisargadatta , " Shawn " <shawnregan> > wrote: > > > > > > When you discover you are encased or entombed in this mechanical > > > mass of flesh. I remember as a child the disbelief that I was > > > this " stuff " a machine of blood and guts. It was such a terror > that > > > I didn't know how I could live as such. My life, me, was > dependent > > > by such a thing. For two weeks I was an anxious basket case. > > > Now I feel like it is a prison and I am at the mercy of it's > jokes > > > and cruelty. Lately this anxiety has returned, I suspect it never > > > left, to torment me around my 40th birthday. Everyday I find " me " > in > > > a different environment of mind. Sometimes it is pleasant like > > > laying in a hammock on a warm summer day listening to the birds > and > > > children play. Other days it is terrifying like someone who is > > > scared of heights being dangled from the top of a skyscraper. Not > to > > > be let go, just dangled. How I appreciate those hammock days like > > > you wouldn't believe. > > > This is however providing me with a crash course of me vs. mind > > > although I think I would have preferred the longer way although I > > > wasn't as diligent as I could be when I feel ok. The urgency is > just > > > not there. > > > How do we manage to live like this? How do we see others dying > > > around us and not completely lose it? The animals do it but I > > > believe they don't know the separation we do. The cruel joke is > that > > > we are just conscious enough to know the death terror but not > > > conscious enough to transcend it. > > > > Death, what is that? You have only been in contact with death > through > > your memory. And that memory is timeless. So, death is just a word. > > And the terror you are experiencing is just a mind projection, like > > pure awareness dipped in dirty mud of fearful memories. Are you > sure > > that you will die? Are you absolutely sure that you will die? > > > > /AL > > P: Are you absolutely sure that you exist? > Have you ever inquire into existing? > Have you inquire into what being sure > means? What we can be sure of is self awareness. Existence is, and that cannot be truthfully denied. I am that existence. Why is there existence? Existence is because we are experiencing it (the grass is green because it is green, sort of :'). This existence cannot be denied other than as a false idea. Existence is one wholeness. There is a connection between my experience of existence and your experience of existence. So, even though we experience existence from unique individual viewpoints, it is the one and same existence we are experiencing. /AL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2004 Report Share Posted November 13, 2004 > > > > P: Are you absolutely sure that you exist? > > Have you ever inquire into existing? > > Have you inquire into what being sure > > means? > > A: What we can be sure of is self awareness. P: Would not you rather say awareness is? Once self is added to that, a step toward separation has been taken. No? A: Existence is, and that > cannot be truthfully denied. I am that existence. P: Again, adding " I am " is " painting legs on a snake. " An extra concept really not needed. A: Why is there > existence? Existence is because we are experiencing it (the grass is > green because it is green, sort of :'). This existence cannot be > denied other than as a false idea. P: Here, by asking " why? " you openned a door to all kind of errors. Can you see there is no why? An that such question is not needed? That any speculation will lead further away from direct perception? >A: Existence is one wholeness. There is a connection between my > experience of existence and your experience of existence. So, even > though we experience existence from unique individual viewpoints, it > is the one and same existence we are experiencing. P: There is no mine or yours here. There is no perception apart from existing. Existing, perceiving, and awareness are one. To use three different words for it, is to tempt confusion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 13, 2004 Report Share Posted November 13, 2004 Nisargadatta , " cerosoul " <Pedsie2@a...> wrote: > > > > > > > P: Are you absolutely sure that you exist? > > > Have you ever inquire into existing? > > > Have you inquire into what being sure > > > means? > > > > A: What we can be sure of is self awareness. > > P: Would not you rather say awareness is? Once self is added > to that, a step toward separation has been taken. No? The separate self is what makes wholeness experiencing itself in many forms. Separation in the form of objects is needed for there to be any interesting experiences at all. > > > A: Existence is, and that > > cannot be truthfully denied. I am that existence. > > P: Again, adding " I am " is " painting legs on a snake. " > An extra concept really not needed. The " I am " is the center of individual experience. Without a focal point as being a unique individual existence would be a messy blur of confusion. > > > > A: Why is there > > existence? Existence is because we are experiencing it (the grass > is > > green because it is green, sort of :'). This existence cannot be > > denied other than as a false idea. > > P: Here, by asking " why? " you openned a door to all kind of errors. > Can you see there is no why? An that such question is not needed? > That any speculation will lead further away from direct perception? The 'why' in any experience is linked to the curiosity inherent in us. You can notice yourself how good it feels when you get an 'Aha!' feeling that makes you understand something that previously was fragments of confusion. > > > >A: Existence is one wholeness. There is a connection between my > > experience of existence and your experience of existence. So, even > > though we experience existence from unique individual viewpoints, > it > > is the one and same existence we are experiencing. > > P: There is no mine or yours here. There is no perception apart > from existing. Existing, perceiving, and awareness are one. To use > three different words for it, is to tempt confusion. A balanced understanding of existing, perceiving and awareness is not confusion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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