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My Dinner With Adithya - why / what 'he' writes ?

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Nisargadatta , " gary falk " <falkgw@h...> wrote:

> Gray: You are so self-obsessed

>

> Adithya:What " self-obsessed " means to you ?

>

> Gary: It means that you are so enamored of your story that it has

entranced

> you to the point that your vision is completely skewed in your

favor. It

> means that you are very partial to yourself, and think that somehow

you are

> special in some way.

>

> A:>What does `contemplation' mean to you?>>

>

> G: Nothing. It's just a word. I don't connect with it at all.

>

>

> A: What does " mind bent inwards " mean to you ?

>

> G: " Mind bent inwards " means that the mind does not see objects.

It means

> that the mind sees nothing. It is the equivalent of " no mind " .

> >

> >

> >A:>Is there any special need to SEE `anything' ...?

>

> G: There is No need to see ANYTHING. Obviously that's my point,

hence the

> phrase " so to speak. " Stop acting dumb, willya?

> >

> A: Especially the one .... " that, requires seeing " ?

>

> G: How long have you been preying on these lists? There is no one

that

> requires anything, either seeing or not seeing. If you had been

listening

> to fuzzie, you wouldn't be asking these inane questions.

>

>

> G:> > All there is is

> > > pure subjective awareness without objects.

> >

> A:...and, how does `Gary' know that ?

>

> G. I don't know that. I am that.

>

> A: Who is `Gary' ?

>

> G: Gary is a nobody, just like you.

> >

> >

> A: Who am `I', then ?

>

> G: Pure subjective awareness without objects.

> >

> A:... " who " " are " communicating ?

>

> G: Oh God, at the risk of sounding like Ramesh, I have to say

consciousness

> itself is the " who " (that) " are " communicating.

> >

> >

> A: Does the " real " grow ?

>

> G: No, but Adithya can grow up if he wants to.

> >

> A:>Do you want to know, why I post ?

>

>

> G: Yes, Adithya, tell me why you bother to post.

 

.....

.....

 

There is Nothing there,

which really means, ...there is Nothing here !

 

Which only starts, ...because,

there is nothing here !

 

 

" Nothing there " is a notion,

that starts with ...nothing here.

 

A reflection of ...nothing here.

 

 

I know, " you " get it already,

....so, yes, let " us " move on ...

 

..

....

......

 

I don't know, why I write,

why I share, ...why, I post.

 

But, maybe, I do ...

 

 

Writing, posting ...

thinking ...

 

Many times, I disappear ...

 

Which is strange,

weird, unexplained ...

 

 

I would expect me to get stronger,

....to become me ... " the poster " !

 

Yet, returning home ...

my feet flounder ...

 

They wobble ...

like the feet of a drunkard ...

 

 

The voice of my colleague, my friend ...

sitting across the table ...talking to me ...

disperse, disappear ...

 

I can hardly understand, comprehend or hear ...

I don't know where I am, ...whether my friend is talking to a wall,

....or is his voice disappearing in empty space !

 

But, I can hardly hear ...

 

 

......

 

 

Sometimes, as if everything has disappeared ...

Yet, I feel so centered, so strong in heart ...

 

Sometimes, just slight feeling around the body,

sometimes, a feeling of connection near the navel.

 

Sometimes, nothing as if ...I am floating space,

....as if a zombie, walking, ...but, ALREADY Dead !

 

So, I write,

and, I write, ...Again !

 

 

People mediate on mountains, in jungles, in ashrams,

....on hills, in their rooms ...

 

I don't know what writing is to me,

but, many, many times over and over..,

 

it makes me ...Empty Space !

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