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Narcissism: Check It Out!

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L.E: Since most of you will be unwilling to look up narcissism, I am bringing

the information to you. As they say, if the shoe fits put it on. Centainly

Bob is described here and perhaps Len as well. You decide for yourselves.

 

There are different theories of how narcissists are made. Some psychologists

trace NPD to early infantile neglect or abuse, and some blame over-indulgence

and indiscriminate praise by parents who don't set limits on what's acceptable

from their children. Others say that NPD shows up in adolescence. Some say

narcissists tend to peak around middle age and then mellow out. Others say that

narcissists stay pretty much the same except they tend to depression as they

get older and their grandiose fantasies are not supported, plus they're not as

good-looking as they used to be. The narcissists I've known have apparently

always been " that way " and they get worse as they get older, with dramatic

regression of their personas after the deaths of their parents and other

personal

authority figures who have previously exerted some control over the

narcissists' bad behavior. And, yes, chronic depression gets to be obvious at

least by

their forties but may have always been present. Depressed narcissists blame the

world, of course, and not themselves for their personal disappointments.

     Essentially, narcissists are unable or unwilling to trust either the

world or other people to meet their needs. Perhaps they were born to parents

unable to connect emotionally and, thus, as infants learned not to let another

person be essential to them in any way. Perhaps NPD starts later, when intrusive

or abusive parents make it dangerous for the child to accept other people's

opinions and valuations. Maybe it comes from a childhood environment of being

treated like royalty or little gods. Whatever the case, narcissists have made

the terrible choice not to love. In their imaginations, they are complete unto

themselves, perfect and not in need of anything anyone else can give them. (NB:

Narcissists do not count their real lives -- i.e., what they do every day and

the people they do it with -- as worth anything.) Their lives are

impoverished and sterile; the price they pay for their golden fantasies is high:

they'll

never share a dream for two.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Nisargadatta , epston wrote:

>

> L.E: Since most of you will be unwilling to look up narcissism, I

am bringing

> the information to you. As they say, if the shoe fits put it on.

Centainly

> Bob is described here and perhaps Len as well. You decide for

yourselves.

>

> There are different theories of how narcissists are made. Some

psychologists

> trace NPD to early infantile neglect or abuse, and some blame over-

indulgence

> and indiscriminate praise by parents who don't set limits on what's

acceptable

> from their children. Others say that NPD shows up in adolescence.

Some say

> narcissists tend to peak around middle age and then mellow out.

Others say that

> narcissists stay pretty much the same except they tend to

depression as they

> get older and their grandiose fantasies are not supported, plus

they're not as

> good-looking as they used to be. The narcissists I've known have

apparently

> always been " that way " and they get worse as they get older, with

dramatic

> regression of their personas after the deaths of their parents and

other personal

> authority figures who have previously exerted some control over the

> narcissists' bad behavior. And, yes, chronic depression gets to be

obvious at least by

> their forties but may have always been present. Depressed

narcissists blame the

> world, of course, and not themselves for their personal

disappointments.

>      Essentially, narcissists are unable or unwilling to trust

either the

> world or other people to meet their needs. Perhaps they were born

to parents

> unable to connect emotionally and, thus, as infants learned not to

let another

> person be essential to them in any way. Perhaps NPD starts later,

when intrusive

> or abusive parents make it dangerous for the child to accept other

people's

> opinions and valuations. Maybe it comes from a childhood

environment of being

> treated like royalty or little gods. Whatever the case, narcissists

have made

> the terrible choice not to love. In their imaginations, they are

complete unto

> themselves, perfect and not in need of anything anyone else can

give them. (NB:

> Narcissists do not count their real lives -- i.e., what they do

every day and

> the people they do it with -- as worth anything.) Their lives are

> impoverished and sterile; the price they pay for their golden

fantasies is high: they'll

> never share a dream for two.

>

> Oh bullshit you dumbass

.....bob

>

>

>

>

>

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In a message dated 4/17/2006 11:02:56 AM Pacific Daylight Time,

Nisargadatta writes:

 

Mon, 17 Apr 2006 10:27:53 EDT

epston

Narcissism: Check It Out!

 

L.E: Since most of you will be unwilling to look up narcissism, I am

bringing

the information to you. As they say, if the shoe fits put it on.

Centainly

Bob is described here and perhaps Len as well. You decide for yourselves.

 

There are different theories of how narcissists are made. Some psychologists

trace NPD to early infantile neglect or abuse, and some blame

over-indulgence

and indiscriminate praise by parents who don't set limits on what's

acceptable

from their children. Others say that NPD shows up in adolescence. Some say

narcissists tend to peak around middle age and then mellow out. Others say

that

narcissists stay pretty much the same except they tend to depression as they

get older and their grandiose fantasies are not supported, plus they're not

as

good-looking as they used to be. The narcissists I've known have apparently

always been " that way " and they get worse as they get older, with dramatic

regression of their personas after the deaths of their parents and other

personal

authority figures who have previously exerted some control over the

narcissists' bad behavior. And, yes, chronic depression gets to be obvious

at least by

their forties but may have always been present. Depressed narcissists blame

the

world, of course, and not themselves for their personal disappointments.

Essentially, narcissists are unable or unwilling to trust either the

world or other people to meet their needs. Perhaps they were born to parents

unable to connect emotionally and, thus, as infants learned not to let

another

person be essential to them in any way. Perhaps NPD starts later, when

intrusive

or abusive parents make it dangerous for the child to accept other people's

opinions and valuations. Maybe it comes from a childhood environment of

being

treated like royalty or little gods. Whatever the case, narcissists have

made

the terrible choice not to love. In their imaginations, they are complete

unto

themselves, perfect and not in need of anything anyone else can give them.

(NB:

Narcissists do not count their real lives -- i.e., what they do every day

and

the people they do it with -- as worth anything.) Their lives are

impoverished and sterile; the price they pay for their golden fantasies is

high: they'll

never share a dream for two.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A rewording of the DSM-IV criteria that seems accurate to me:

 

 

* Feels grandiose and self-important (e.g., exaggerates

accomplishments, talents, skills, contacts, and personality traits to the point

of lying,

demands to be recognised as superior without commensurate achievements);

* Is obsessed with fantasies of unlimited success, fame, fearsome

power or omnipotence, unequalled brilliance (the cerebral narcissist), bodily

beauty or sexual performance (the somatic narcissist), or ideal, everlasting,

all-conquering love or passion;

* Firmly convinced that he or she is unique and, being special, can

only be understood by, should only be treated by, or associate with, other

special or unique, or high-status people (or institutions);

* Requires excessive admiration, adulation, attention and affirmation –

or, failing that, wishes to be feared and to be notorious (Narcissistic

Supply);

* Feels entitled. Demands automatic and full compliance with his or

her unreasonable expectations for special and favourable priority treatment;

* Is " interpersonally exploitative " , i.e., uses others to achieve his

or her own ends;

* Devoid of empathy. Is unable or unwilling to identify with,

acknowledge, or accept the feelings, needs, preferences, priorities, and

choices of

others;

* Constantly envious of others and seeks to hurt or destroy the

objects of his or her frustration. Suffers from persecutory (paranoid)

delusions as

he or she believes that they feel the same about him or her and are likely

to act similarly;

* Behaves arrogantly and haughtily. Feels superior, omnipotent,

omniscient, invincible, immune, " above the law " , and omnipresent (magical

thinking). Rages when frustrated, contradicted, or confronted by people he or

she

considers inferior to him or her and unworthy.

 

 

 

 

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In a message dated 4/17/2006 5:39:18 PM Pacific Daylight Time, ADHHUB

writes:

 

>

>

> In a message dated 4/17/2006 11:02:56 AM Pacific Daylight Time,

> Nisargadatta writes:

>

> Mon, 17 Apr 2006 10:27:53 EDT

> epston

> Narcissism: Check It Out!

>

> L.E: Since most of you will be unwilling to look up narcissism, I am

> bringing

> the information to you. As they say, if the shoe fits put it on.

> Centainly

> Bob is described here and perhaps Len as well. You decide for yourselves.

>

> There are different theories of how narcissists are made. Some psychologists

>

> trace NPD to early infantile neglect or abuse, and some blame

> over-indulgence

> and indiscriminate praise by parents who don't set limits on what's

> acceptable

> from their children. Others say that NPD shows up in adolescence. Some say

> narcissists tend to peak around middle age and then mellow out. Others say

> that

> narcissists stay pretty much the same except they tend to depression as

> they

> get older and their grandiose fantasies are not supported, plus they're not

>

> as

> good-looking as they used to be. The narcissists I've known have apparently

>

> always been " that way " and they get worse as they get older, with dramatic

> regression of their personas after the deaths of their parents and other

> personal

> authority figures who have previously exerted some control over the

> narcissists' bad behavior. And, yes, chronic depression gets to be obvious

> at least by

> their forties but may have always been present. Depressed narcissists blame

>

> the

> world, of course, and not themselves for their personal disappointments.

> Essentially, narcissists are unable or unwilling to trust either the

> world or other people to meet their needs. Perhaps they were born to

> parents

> unable to connect emotionally and, thus, as infants learned not to let

> another

> person be essential to them in any way. Perhaps NPD starts later, when

> intrusive

> or abusive parents make it dangerous for the child to accept other people's

>

> opinions and valuations. Maybe it comes from a childhood environment of

> being

> treated like royalty or little gods. Whatever the case, narcissists have

> made

> the terrible choice not to love. In their imaginations, they are complete

> unto

> themselves, perfect and not in need of anything anyone else can give them.

> (NB:

> Narcissists do not count their real lives -- i.e., what they do every day

> and

> the people they do it with -- as worth anything.) Their lives are

> impoverished and sterile; the price they pay for their golden fantasies is

> high: they'll

> never share a dream for two.

>

> A rewording of the DSM-IV criteria that seems accurate to me:

>

> Feels grandiose and self-important (e.g., exaggerates

> accomplishments, talents, skills, contacts, and personality traits to the

> point of lying,

> demands to be recognised as superior without commensurate achievements);

> * Is obsessed with fantasies of unlimited success, fame, fearsome

> power or omnipotence, unequalled brilliance (the cerebral narcissist),

> bodily

> beauty or sexual performance (the somatic narcissist), or ideal,

> everlasting,

> all-conquering love or passion;

> * Firmly convinced that he or she is unique and, being special, can

> only be understood by, should only be treated by, or associate with, other

> special or unique, or high-status people (or institutions);

> * Requires excessive admiration, adulation, attention and affirmation –

> or, failing that, wishes to be feared and to be notorious (Narcissistic

> Supply);

> * Feels entitled. Demands automatic and full compliance with his or

> her unreasonable expectations for special and favourable priority

> treatment;

> * Is " interpersonally exploitative " , i.e., uses others to achieve his

> or her own ends;

> * Devoid of empathy. Is unable or unwilling to identify with,

> acknowledge, or accept the feelings, needs, preferences, priorities, and

> choices of

> others;

> * Constantly envious of others and seeks to hurt or destroy the

> objects of his or her frustration. Suffers from persecutory (paranoid)

> delusions as

> he or she believes that they feel the same about him or her and are likely

> to act similarly;

> * Behaves arrogantly and haughtily. Feels superior, omnipotent,

> omniscient, invincible, immune, " above the law " , and omnipresent (magical

> thinking). Rages when frustrated, contradicted, or confronted by people he

> or she

> considers inferior to him or her and unworthy.

>

>

L.E: Sure sound like me. Especially the part about sexual performance. Yumm

yumm. And describes Bob Nixon, who has some kind of problem if not this one,

and a little like Len who always wants to have the last word and be one up on

others. Maybe you know others like this and wondered why you had such a lousy

suffering life with them.

 

 

 

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Nisargadatta , ADHHUB wrote:

>

>

> In a message dated 4/17/2006 11:02:56 AM Pacific Daylight Time,

> Nisargadatta writes:

>

> Mon, 17 Apr 2006 10:27:53 EDT

> epston

> Narcissism: Check It Out!

>

> L.E: Since most of you will be unwilling to look up narcissism, I

am

> bringing

> the information to you. As they say, if the shoe fits put it

on.

> Centainly

> Bob is described here and perhaps Len as well. You decide for

yourselves.

>

> There are different theories >< snip to>they'll

> never share a dream for two.

 

>

> A rewording of the DSM-IV criteria that seems accurate to me:

>

>

> * Feels grandiose and self-important>< snip to> Behaves

arrogantly and haughtily. Feels superior, omnipotent,

> omniscient, invincible, immune, " above the law " , and omnipresent

(magical

> thinking). Rages when frustrated, contradicted, or confronted by

people he or she

> considers inferior to him or her and unworthy.

>

> Phil this whole thing that you posted sounds hauntingly familiar,

like it's about someone I think I may know. Larry has pointed out the

similarities he sees in his posted thing with me specifically, and

possibly Len. Your info though reminds me of some dumbass who talks

bullshit all the time. Just a guess here. Maybe I'll ask L.E. to not

send me a personal email on who he may think(no that's a bad term

here), well who he may consider it to be a description of.

.....bob ;-)

>

>

>

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In a message dated 4/17/2006 11:52:19 PM Pacific Daylight Time,

Nisargadatta writes:

 

Tue, 18 Apr 2006 00:59:02 -0000

" Bob N. " <Roberibus111

Re: Narcissism: Check It Out!

 

Nisargadatta , ADHHUB wrote:

>

>

> In a message dated 4/17/2006 11:02:56 AM Pacific Daylight Time,

> Nisargadatta writes:

>

> Mon, 17 Apr 2006 10:27:53 EDT

> epston

> Narcissism: Check It Out!

>

> L.E: Since most of you will be unwilling to look up narcissism, I

am

> bringing

> the information to you. As they say, if the shoe fits put it

on.

> Centainly

> Bob is described here and perhaps Len as well. You decide for

yourselves.

>

> There are different theories >< snip to>they'll

> never share a dream for two.

 

>

> A rewording of the DSM-IV criteria that seems accurate to me:

>

>

> * Feels grandiose and self-important>< snip to> Behaves

arrogantly and haughtily. Feels superior, omnipotent,

> omniscient, invincible, immune, " above the law " , and omnipresent

(magical

> thinking). Rages when frustrated, contradicted, or confronted by

people he or she

> considers inferior to him or her and unworthy.

>

> Phil this whole thing that you posted sounds hauntingly familiar,

like it's about someone I think I may know. Larry has pointed out the

similarities he sees in his posted thing with me specifically, and

possibly Len. Your info though reminds me of some dumbass who talks

bullshit all the time. Just a guess here. Maybe I'll ask L.E. to not

send me a personal email on who he may think(no that's a bad term

here), well who he may consider it to be a description of.

......bob ;-)

 

 

 

 

Yes, the words " hateful, unkind and obsessive " may be added if one wishes to

gain a larger perspective on the image being projected onto your T-shirt.

 

 

 

 

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Nisargadatta , ADHHUB wrote:

>

>

> In a message dated 4/17/2006 11:52:19 PM Pacific Daylight Time,

> Nisargadatta writes:

>

> Tue, 18 Apr 2006 00:59:02 -0000

> " Bob N. " <Roberibus111

> Re: Narcissism: Check It Out!

>

> Nisargadatta , ADHHUB@ wrote:

> >

> >

> > In a message dated 4/17/2006 11:02:56 AM Pacific Daylight Time,

> > Nisargadatta writes:

> >

> > Mon, 17 Apr 2006 10:27:53 EDT

> > epston@

> > Narcissism: Check It Out!

> >

> > L.E: Since most of you will be unwilling to look up narcissism,

I

> am

> > bringing

> > the information to you. As they say, if the shoe fits put it

> on.

> > Centainly

> > Bob is described here and perhaps Len as well. You decide for

> yourselves.

> >

> > There are different theories >< snip to>they'll

> > never share a dream for two.

>

> >

> > A rewording of the DSM-IV criteria that seems accurate to me:

> >

> >

> > * Feels grandiose and self-important>< snip to> Behaves

> arrogantly and haughtily. Feels superior, omnipotent,

> > omniscient, invincible, immune, " above the law " , and

omnipresent

> (magical

> > thinking). Rages when frustrated, contradicted, or confronted

by

> people he or she

> > considers inferior to him or her and unworthy.

> >

> > Phil this whole thing that you posted sounds hauntingly

familiar,

> like it's about someone I think I may know. Larry has pointed out

the

> similarities he sees in his posted thing with me specifically, and

> possibly Len. Your info though reminds me of some dumbass who

talks

> bullshit all the time. Just a guess here. Maybe I'll ask L.E. to

not

> send me a personal email on who he may think(no that's a bad term

> here), well who he may consider it to be a description of.

> .....bob ;-)

>

>

>

>

> Yes, the words " hateful, unkind and obsessive " may be added if one

wishes to

> gain a larger perspective on the image being projected onto your T-

shirt.

 

 

>

> Hi Phil..MY T shirt? Hope you didn't think I was referring to you

above. There is only one on the list that I have referred to as a

dumbass who utters bullshit, and it is the same guy I said I would

make a request of to not send me an email regarding who he might

consider it to be.'Consider it', as the idea of his 'thinking' was

out of the question and could only be used if I was being

disingenuous about using the term " think " . Hope I'm wrong about what

your saying here and I probably am..it's just kinda the way the

comment seems directed. I would not ever refer to you in terms

anything close to what I refer to as regards Larry.Never pal.

.......bob

 

 

>

>

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In a message dated 4/18/2006 6:14:55 AM Pacific Daylight Time,

Nisargadatta writes:

 

Tue, 18 Apr 2006 10:32:57 -0000

" Bob N. " <Roberibus111

Re: Narcissism: Check It Out!

 

Nisargadatta , ADHHUB wrote:

>

>

> In a message dated 4/17/2006 11:52:19 PM Pacific Daylight Time,

> Nisargadatta writes:

>

> Tue, 18 Apr 2006 00:59:02 -0000

> " Bob N. " <Roberibus111

> Re: Narcissism: Check It Out!

>

> Nisargadatta , ADHHUB@ wrote:

> >

> >

> > In a message dated 4/17/2006 11:02:56 AM Pacific Daylight Time,

> > Nisargadatta writes:

> >

> > Mon, 17 Apr 2006 10:27:53 EDT

> > epston@

> > Narcissism: Check It Out!

> >

> > L.E: Since most of you will be unwilling to look up narcissism,

I

> am

> > bringing

> > the information to you. As they say, if the shoe fits put it

> on.

> > Centainly

> > Bob is described here and perhaps Len as well. You decide for

> yourselves.

> >

> > There are different theories >< snip to>they'll

> > never share a dream for two.

>

> >

> > A rewording of the DSM-IV criteria that seems accurate to me:

> >

> >

> > * Feels grandiose and self-important>< snip to> Behaves

> arrogantly and haughtily. Feels superior, omnipotent,

> > omniscient, invincible, immune, " above the law " , and

omnipresent

> (magical

> > thinking). Rages when frustrated, contradicted, or confronted

by

> people he or she

> > considers inferior to him or her and unworthy.

> >

> > Phil this whole thing that you posted sounds hauntingly

familiar,

> like it's about someone I think I may know. Larry has pointed out

the

> similarities he sees in his posted thing with me specifically, and

> possibly Len. Your info though reminds me of some dumbass who

talks

> bullshit all the time. Just a guess here. Maybe I'll ask L.E. to

not

> send me a personal email on who he may think(no that's a bad term

> here), well who he may consider it to be a description of.

> .....bob ;-)

>

>

>

>

> Yes, the words " hateful, unkind and obsessive " may be added if one

wishes to

> gain a larger perspective on the image being projected onto your T-

shirt.

 

 

>

> Hi Phil..MY T shirt? Hope you didn't think I was referring to you

above. There is only one on the list that I have referred to as a

dumbass who utters bullshit, and it is the same guy I said I would

make a request of to not send me an email regarding who he might

consider it to be.'Consider it', as the idea of his 'thinking' was

out of the question and could only be used if I was being

disingenuous about using the term " think " . Hope I'm wrong about what

your saying here and I probably am..it's just kinda the way the

comment seems directed. I would not ever refer to you in terms

anything close to what I refer to as regards Larry.Never pal.

........bob

 

 

 

Oh, no, Bob. Twas a misunderstanding. It's Larry who is projecting onto you

and seeing his own qualities in his perception of you, hence the metaphor of

projecting it onto your shirt and then observing it.

 

 

 

 

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