Ways of Peace . . .

[Guest guest]

21 Ways to Stay in the Peace

From Byron Katie

Compiled by Mary Lynn Hendrix

 

Introduction

 

The following are simple yet powerful

practices that can give you new ways of

looking at your life circumstances,

and in that, create new possibilities

for self-realization.

 

1. Reversing Judgements

 

Practice noticing when you judge or

criticize someone or something. For

example, in a grocery store line, you

might be impatient and think the person in

front of you is disorganized and rude.

Quickly turn your judgment around and

ask yourself: " Is it just as true

about me? Am I rude? (Am I rude

sometimes; to others - or to myself?)

Am I being rude inside of me when I think they

are rude? "

 

This exercise takes your attention off

the " other " and places your attention

on you. Forgiveness naturally results.

Placing the blame or judgment on

someone else leaves you powerless to

change your experience; taking

responsibility for your beliefs and

judgments gives you the power to change

them.

 

Remember, beyond the appearance of who

it is you are looking at, it is always

God disguised, standing in front of you

so that you can know yourself.

Reversing judgments allows complete

forgiveness. Forgiveness leads to

awareness of oneself, and reestablishes personal

integrity.

 

2. The Three Kinds of Business

 

Notice when you hurt that you are

mentally out of your business. If

you're not sure, stop and ask,

" Mentally, whose business am I in? " There are only

three kinds of business in the

universe: mine, yours, and God's. Whose

business is it if an earthquake happens? God's

business. Whose business is it if your

neighbor down the street has an ugly

lawn? Your neighbor's business. Whose

business is it if you are angry at your

neighbor down the street because they

have an ugly lawn? Your business. Life is

simple-it is internal.

 

Count, in five minute intervals, how

many times you are in someone else's

business mentally. Notice when you give

uninvited advice or offer your opinion

about something (aloud or silently).

Ask yourself: " Am I in their business?

Did they ask me for my advice? " And more

importantly, " Can I take the advice I

am offering and apply it to my life? "

 

3. Being in Nobody's Business

 

After working with the practice of

staying out of others' business, try to

stay out of your own business as well.

Hold lightly whatever you think you know

about yourself. " I am contained within

this physical body. " Is it true? Can I

absolutely know that it's true? What

do I get by holding that belief? There

is a widespread belief that we are our

bodies, and we will die. Who would I

be without the belief?

 

4. " Detaching " from Your Body/Your Story

 

Try speaking about yourself, for a

period of time, in the third person

rather than as I or me. Instead of

saying, " I'm going to lunch " , say, " She's going to

lunch, " (referring to yourself), or,

" This one is going to lunch. " Do this

with a friend for an hour, the afternoon, or

the entire day. Eliminate the use of

all personal pronouns (I, me, we). For

example, " How is that one (or this

one) today? Does he want to go to the

park? " Experience impersonally the body,

the stories, and the preferences which

you think you are.

 

5. Speaking in the Present Tense

 

Become mindful of how often your

conversations focus on the past or

future. Be aware of the verbs you use:

was, did, will, are going to, etc. To speak of

the past in the present is to reawaken

and recreate it fully in the present,

if only in our minds, and then we are lost to

what is present for us now. To speak of

the future is to create and live with a

fantasy. If you want to experience

fear, think of the future. If you want

to experience shame and guilt, think of

the past.

 

6. Doing the Dishes

 

" Doing the dishes " is a practice of

learning to love the action that is in

front of you. Your inner voice or

intuition guides you all day long to do simple

things such as doing the dishes,

driving to work, or sweeping the floor.

Allow the sanctity of simplicity. Listening

to your inner voice and then acting on

its suggestions with implicit trust

creates a life that is more graceful,

effortless, and miraculous.

 

7. Listening to the Voice of the Body

 

The body is the voice of your mind,

and it speaks to you in physical

movement as muscular contractions - as

twitches, twinges, tickles and tension, just to

name a few. Become aware of how often

you move away from peace or stillness.

Practice stillness and let your body

speak to you of where your mind

contracts, no matter how subtle the

flickering contraction may be. When you notice a

sensation, inquire within, " What

situation or contracted thought is

triggering this physical sensation? Am I out of

alignment with my integrity in this

circumstance, and if so, where? Am I

willing to let go of this belief or thought

that causes my body to contract? "

Listen and allow the answers to guide

you, and return to the peace and clarity within.

[Guest guest]

Nisargadatta , " Arvind " <adithya_comming

wrote:

>

> 21 Ways to Stay in the Peace

> From Byron Katie

> Compiled by Mary Lynn Hendrix

>

 

8. Reporting to Yourself

 

This exercise can help in healing fear

and terror. Practice reporting events

to yourself as if a circumstance you find

yourself in is actually a news story

and you are the roving reporter.

 

Announce exactly what your surroundings

are and what's happening " on the scene " at

that very moment. Fear is always the

result of projecting a re-creation of

the past into the now or the future. If you

find yourself fearful, find the core

belief and inquire: " Is it true that I

need to be fearful in this situation? What is

actually happening right now,

physically? Where is my body (hands,

arms, feet, legs, head)? What do I see (trees, walls,

windows, sky)? "

 

Impersonalizing our stories gives us

an opportunity to look at circumstances

more objectively, and choose our

responses to what life brings. Living

in our minds, believing our untrue

thoughts, is a good way to scare

ourselves to death, and it can appear in form as

old age, cancer, degeneration, high

blood pressure, etc.

 

 

9. Literal Hearing

 

Practice listening to others in the

most literal sense, believing exactly

what they say, and do your best to

resist falling into your own interpretations about

the information they share with you.

For example, someone might compliment

you on how beautiful you are, and you

interpret that as an implication that

the person has ulterior motives. Our

interpretations of what we hear people

say to us are often far more painful or

frightening than what people actually

say. We can hurt ourselves with our

misconceptions and our thinking for

others.

 

Try trusting that what they say is

exactly what they mean: not more, not

less. Hear people out. Catch yourself

when you want to finish a sentence for

someone either aloud or in your mind.

Listen. It can be amazing to hear what

comes out when we allow others to complete

their thoughts without interruption.

And, when we are busy thinking we know

what they are about to say, we are

missing what they are actually saying.

You might want to consider these

questions: " What can be threatened if I

listen and hear literally? Do I interrupt

because I don't want to really know

what they have to say? Do I interrupt

to convince them I know more than they

do? Am I attempting to portray an

image of self-confidence and control?

Who would I be without the need to

possess those qualities? Is there a fear of

appearing unintelligent? Would people

leave me if I heard them literally, and

no longer engage in manipulative games? "

 

 

10. Speaking Honestly and Literally

 

Speak literally. Say what you mean

without justification, without any

desire to manipulate, and without

concern about how another may interpret your words.

Practice not being careful. Experience

the freedom this brings.

 

11. Watching the Play

 

See yourself in a balcony, watching

your favorite drama about you and what

distresses you. Watch the story on the

stage below. Notice how you have seen

this drama performed hundreds, perhaps

thousands, of times. Watch this until

you find yourself becoming bored. The

performers are having to exaggerate

their parts to keep your attention.

 

Notice when you get honest with your boredom,

you get up from your seat, leave the

balcony, exit the playhouse, and step

outside. Always know you can re-visit.

Who would you be without your story?

 

12. Watching a Second Version of the

Play

 

Write your story from the eyes and

mind of another. Write as many

different versions with as many different

outcomes as you like. Notice what you

notice.

 

13. Exercising Polarity

 

If you find yourself dwelling on a

negative thought, practice going to the

opposite positive extreme or polarity.

When you catch yourself slipping back into

negativity, choose again to return to

the positive polarity and be present with

your conscious choice; feel the truth

of it. There is only love, and what

doesn't appear as love is a disguised

call for love. It is your birthright to live in

the positive polarity of love and truth.

 

14. Self Loving Process

 

Make a list of everything you love

about someone and share it with them.

Then, give yourself everything that is on

the list. You may also recognize that

what you love about someone else is

just as true of you. Then allow the

fullness of it to be expressed in your life.

 

 

15. Coming from Honesty

 

Practice moving and responding

honestly. Laugh, cry, scream, and speak

as it is genuinely true for you in each

moment. Be a child again; act in full

integrity with your feelings. Don't let

beliefs compromise your integrity. For

example, practice leaving a room

honestly without manipulating those you

leave behind with a polite excuse. Live

your truth without explaining yourself.