Fwd: Wake, Dream, Sleep: one the experiences SELF

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advaitin ,

" Manuel Delaflor " <delaflor wrote:

 

On 5/9/06, yajvan <agnimile wrote:

>

> Hari Om

> ~~~~~~~~

>

>

> Namaste Manuel

>

 

Namaste Yajvan

 

 

> Thank you for your post, it is good

to hear from someone possessed of

SELF. Is your experience all the

time? 7x24x365?

 

 

> Was this a 'dawning' for you, or

ahve you been blessed to be in SELF

all of your life?

 

 

> I ask this for you have written

'lived' in past tense, vs. present

condtion. DO you care to describe

your experices?

 

 

I will explain my experience, with

pleasure, but I hope you dont expect the

" normal " words of one who have reached

the ultimate state (to put it in

words).

 

What is worst, I do not know the

appropriate words (are they sanscrit?) to

express myself better.

 

Anyway. Indeed I wrote " lived " because

I am no longer " there " .

 

It happened suddenly, I was driving

back home when I remembered the I am

That by Nisargadatta, and without

advice I was " THERE " . I realized that the

book were written just for me, but not

me Manuel, but for " me " the non dual

reality. There are no others, and

there is no I.

 

Now, for me, this was not about

founding " the absolute bliss " , all I

reached was an inconmensurable fear about not

being a human being anymore.

 

I was there for four months, in

constant and violent fear because my

human shape was just an idea, and nothing I

knew was real. The world become,

strangely, completely different to

what we normally see. It is impossible to

describe using words that state of " no

being " that it is still, somehow,

inside this illusion about " being " .

 

A bit of history. All I wanted, for

all my life, was to understand what was

the world and what we were doing here.

This is, of course, up to that

moment, in which I really didnt want

to know anything else. There were

nothing else to know. I saw that all

" knowledge " is a mental illusion,

merely tricks with words, without any

content.

 

I returned to be a human among humans,

because the fear was all that was

left of me. A zen master told me,

years later, that it was the last resort

of my ego to " bring me back " .

 

That happened 12 years ago. I still

feel that I can go " there " if I want

(sometimes, discussing about

philosophy or just " entering the

moment " Im almost there, for a few moments),

but for now Im happy living my life as a

human being... Maybe when I feel Im

ready.

 

(I understand perfectly the logical

contradictions in here, but its a

problem of logic, not of being)

 

Now, regarding your specific question

(sorry for the large post), yes. THAT

was there all the time, but again,

words cant really grasp it. You are in a

completely different state; Walking

life, Dreaming and Deep Sleep are just

" experiences " that happen, and

" something " was there, all the time,

watching. It was not me, it is not

human, it can be called Brahman??

 

I hope my answer is useful to you.

 

 

 

Manuel Delaflor

 

 

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