Guest guest Posted August 3, 2006 Report Share Posted August 3, 2006 I have written like this many times... I have felt like this many times... and, many times I have tried to analyze, " understand " , capture and put into words what I have felt, how I have felt and why I have felt in this way. In a way, I have been looking for formulae - something that will help me recreate it anytime I want. I can't say I have really found all the ingredients, the proportions that make it. I can not say that I really have the formulae - because, clearly I don't. I don't even know if I am like all humans or if all humans are just like me. I can't say what is true for me is true for others too. I can't say what works for me, will work for others too. Yet, when one reads this " long " and to many " boring " " excuse " for what I am going to write and why I am writing - it is not hard to see that the emotion that is at work here is - Fear! As if I feel the need to " justify " - " what I write " , " why I write " , " how I write " ... And, that to me, seems like the reason for pretty much every psychological, mental problem, pain, suffering, suffocation that I have ever felt... Fear of father, fear of losing respect in front of peers, fear of wife, fear of losing face in front of " virtual " email friends, fear of having to communicate with likes of.... Yes, it is true that I have been many times afraid of my father [until I was about 21 years old] It is true that I have been many times afraid of losing face in front of peers [i think to some extent, I have this " fear " even now] It is true that I have been afraid of my wife [i think to some extent, I have some of this " fear " even now] It is true that many times, when participating on lists, I have been afraid of extremely critical reactions of some members... Yes, it is true that sometimes I have been afraid of having to deal with the folks like .... And, each and every one of this " fear " has resulted into inner " repression " , mental pain and suffering... and, I can't say that I have ever known any other kind of " suffering " ... ever... Have you? Have you known any " suffering " which is not linked to any " fear " ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 4, 2006 Report Share Posted August 4, 2006 Nisargadatta , " adithya_comming " <adithya_comming wrote: > > I have written like this many times... > > I have felt like this many times... > > and, many times I have tried to > analyze, " understand " , capture and put > into words what I have felt, how I have > felt and why I have felt in this way. > > In a way, I have been looking for > formulae - something that will help me > recreate it anytime I want. > > I can't say I have really found all > the ingredients, the proportions that > make it. I can not say that I really > have the formulae - because, clearly I > don't. > > I don't even know if I am like all > humans or if all humans are just like > me. I can't say what is true for me is > true for others too. I can't say what > works for me, will work for others too. > > Yet, when one reads this " long " and to > many " boring " " excuse " for what I am > going to write and why I am writing - > it is not hard to see that the emotion > that is at work here is - Fear! > > As if I feel the need to " justify " - > " what I write " , " why I write " , " how I > write " ... > > And, that to me, seems like the reason > for pretty much every psychological, > mental problem, pain, suffering, > suffocation that I have ever felt... > > Fear of father, fear of losing respect > in front of peers, fear of wife, fear > of losing face in front of " virtual " > email friends, fear of having to > communicate with likes of.... > > Yes, it is true that I have been many > times afraid of my father [until I was > about 21 years old] > > It is true that I have been many times > afraid of losing face in front of peers > [i think to some extent, I have this > " fear " even now] > > It is true that I have been afraid of > my wife [i think to some extent, I have > some of this " fear " even now] > > It is true that many times, when > participating on lists, I have been > afraid of extremely critical reactions > of some members... > > Yes, it is true that sometimes I have > been afraid of having to deal with > the folks like .... > > > And, each and every one of this " fear " > has resulted into inner " repression " , > mental pain and suffering... > > and, I can't say that I have ever > known any other kind of " suffering " ... > ever... > > > Have you? > > Have you known any " suffering " which > is not linked to any " fear " ? > fear IS suffering and it IS physical as well as mantral the mantral (read, mental) becomes the physical and vice versa my father's been dead for 20 years and i still fear him: that is: the mantras i repeat around his dream image: root mantra dude, you are a man of courage! .... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 4, 2006 Report Share Posted August 4, 2006 Nisargadatta , " skywhilds " <skywords wrote: > > Nisargadatta , " adithya_comming " > <adithya_comming@> wrote: > > > > I have written like this many times... > > > > I have felt like this many times... > > > > and, many times I have tried to > > analyze, " understand " , capture and put > > into words what I have felt, how I have > > felt and why I have felt in this way. > > > > In a way, I have been looking for > > formulae - something that will help me > > recreate it anytime I want. > > > > I can't say I have really found all > > the ingredients, the proportions that > > make it. I can not say that I really > > have the formulae - because, clearly I > > don't. > > > > I don't even know if I am like all > > humans or if all humans are just like > > me. I can't say what is true for me is > > true for others too. I can't say what > > works for me, will work for others too. > > > > Yet, when one reads this " long " and to > > many " boring " " excuse " for what I am > > going to write and why I am writing - > > it is not hard to see that the emotion > > that is at work here is - Fear! > > > > As if I feel the need to " justify " - > > " what I write " , " why I write " , " how I > > write " ... > > > > And, that to me, seems like the reason > > for pretty much every psychological, > > mental problem, pain, suffering, > > suffocation that I have ever felt... > > > > Fear of father, fear of losing respect > > in front of peers, fear of wife, fear > > of losing face in front of " virtual " > > email friends, fear of having to > > communicate with likes of.... > > > > Yes, it is true that I have been many > > times afraid of my father [until I was > > about 21 years old] > > > > It is true that I have been many times > > afraid of losing face in front of peers > > [i think to some extent, I have this > > " fear " even now] > > > > It is true that I have been afraid of > > my wife [i think to some extent, I have > > some of this " fear " even now] > > > > It is true that many times, when > > participating on lists, I have been > > afraid of extremely critical reactions > > of some members... > > > > Yes, it is true that sometimes I have > > been afraid of having to deal with > > the folks like .... > > > > > > And, each and every one of this " fear " > > has resulted into inner " repression " , > > mental pain and suffering... > > > > and, I can't say that I have ever > > known any other kind of " suffering " ... > > ever... > > > > > > Have you? > > > > Have you known any " suffering " which > > is not linked to any " fear " ? > > > > > fear IS suffering > > and it IS physical > > as well as mantral > > the mantral (read, mental) > > becomes the physical > > and vice versa > > > my father's been dead for 20 years > > and i still fear him: > > that is: > > the mantras i repeat around his > > dream image: root mantra > > > dude, you are a man > > of courage! > > > > ... > in The Course Of Miracles, it is said there are only two emotions: fear and love... everything experienced as contraction is fear everything experienced as opening is love one can feel fear in ones heart or abdomen that catch, that tightness, that constraint of breath, that closure. one can feel love as an opening, an orgasm of the heart, these waves of ecstasy it isn't difficult to choose when we know fear and how to transcend or transmute the beginning of love: Recognizing fear. Anna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 4, 2006 Report Share Posted August 4, 2006 Nisargadatta , " anabebe57 " <kailashana wrote: > > Nisargadatta , " skywhilds " <skywords@> > wrote: > > > > Nisargadatta , " adithya_comming " > > <adithya_comming@> wrote: > > > > > > I have written like this many times... > > > > > > I have felt like this many times... > > > > > > and, many times I have tried to > > > analyze, " understand " , capture and put > > > into words what I have felt, how I have > > > felt and why I have felt in this way. > > > > > > In a way, I have been looking for > > > formulae - something that will help me > > > recreate it anytime I want. > > > > > > I can't say I have really found all > > > the ingredients, the proportions that > > > make it. I can not say that I really > > > have the formulae - because, clearly I > > > don't. > > > > > > I don't even know if I am like all > > > humans or if all humans are just like > > > me. I can't say what is true for me is > > > true for others too. I can't say what > > > works for me, will work for others too. > > > > > > Yet, when one reads this " long " and to > > > many " boring " " excuse " for what I am > > > going to write and why I am writing - > > > it is not hard to see that the emotion > > > that is at work here is - Fear! > > > > > > As if I feel the need to " justify " - > > > " what I write " , " why I write " , " how I > > > write " ... > > > > > > And, that to me, seems like the reason > > > for pretty much every psychological, > > > mental problem, pain, suffering, > > > suffocation that I have ever felt... > > > > > > Fear of father, fear of losing respect > > > in front of peers, fear of wife, fear > > > of losing face in front of " virtual " > > > email friends, fear of having to > > > communicate with likes of.... > > > > > > Yes, it is true that I have been many > > > times afraid of my father [until I was > > > about 21 years old] > > > > > > It is true that I have been many times > > > afraid of losing face in front of peers > > > [i think to some extent, I have this > > > " fear " even now] > > > > > > It is true that I have been afraid of > > > my wife [i think to some extent, I have > > > some of this " fear " even now] > > > > > > It is true that many times, when > > > participating on lists, I have been > > > afraid of extremely critical reactions > > > of some members... > > > > > > Yes, it is true that sometimes I have > > > been afraid of having to deal with > > > the folks like .... > > > > > > > > > And, each and every one of this " fear " > > > has resulted into inner " repression " , > > > mental pain and suffering... > > > > > > and, I can't say that I have ever > > > known any other kind of " suffering " ... > > > ever... > > > > > > > > > Have you? > > > > > > Have you known any " suffering " which > > > is not linked to any " fear " ? > > > > > > > > > fear IS suffering > > > > and it IS physical > > > > as well as mantral > > > > the mantral (read, mental) > > > > becomes the physical > > > > and vice versa > > > > > > my father's been dead for 20 years > > > > and i still fear him: > > > > that is: > > > > the mantras i repeat around his > > > > dream image: root mantra > > > > > > dude, you are a man > > > > of courage! > > > > > > > > ... > > > > > in The Course Of Miracles, it is said there are only two emotions: > > fear and love... > > everything experienced as contraction is fear > everything experienced as opening is love > > one can feel fear in ones heart or abdomen that catch, that > tightness, that constraint of breath, that closure. > > one can feel love as an opening, an orgasm of the heart, these > waves of ecstasy > > it isn't difficult to choose when we know fear and how to transcend > or transmute the beginning of love: Recognizing fear. > > Anna > as clear as a lovely belle dare i say it: cling to love cling to openness cling to warmth cling to embracing it all cling to mantras of ecstacy cling to letting go cling to the heart's amber glow the white light bright and slow wide, gentle, simple sing mmmmmmmmmmmmmnnnnnnnnnn aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo uuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm .... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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