How can I allow you to be perfect

[Guest guest]

P: Those two posts are excellent, Arvind.

I'm crossposting them..

Thanks.

On Oct 6, 2006, at 4:09 AM, Nisargadatta wrote:

 

> How can you be perfect

>

> ...when, 'finding' faults in you

> is my fulltime job?

>

> When I stop 'finding' faults

> in _What_Is_; I feel like

> not having any " work " !

>

> I feel 'unemployed'.

>

> I feel as if 'I' amd not needed.

>

> I feel as if 'I' have no 'reason' to 'exist'.

>

> How can 'I' let that happen...

> when finding something 'wrong'

> is so intricately linked to my survival?

>

> I see that 'I' spend some of

> my 'thinking time' in finding flaws in evrything else...

>

> and, rest of the times [when 'I'

> am not 'busy' finding flaws in someone

> or something else] ...

>

> I am 'busy' finding faults in " me " !

>

> Any " fault " , anywhere will do,

> as it gives " me " a 'job',

> it gives " me " something to do!

>

> Without 'something to do'

> ...'I' feel so restless!

>

> Without 'something to do'

> ...I don't even know why 'I' am there!

>

> And, that's why looking for faults

> is my fulltime job!

>

> Looking for faults

> Looking for what is wrong

> pretty much summarises all my " thinking time " !

>

> My " thinking " survives only because

> I am looking for 'something to do'!

>

> And, when I am not 'thinking'...

> 'I' don't even see " me " existing.

>

> And, how can 'I' let happen?

>

> When, 'I' am so very important to " me " !

>

> I have noticed that

> 'I' sustain " me " in my thinking

> and I sustain it only as long as

> I am sure 'I' is needed.

>

> And, I am sure of 'I' being needed

> only when I can feel that there

> is something 'to do'...

>

> and, I feel there is something 'to do'

> only by thinking that _What_Is_ needs

> some 'improvements', some 'changes'

> that 'I' need to make!

>

> 'Finding fault'...

> yes, that is " my " fulltime job!