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news bytes: Wassup! who's da dummy?

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AT & T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked

" intellectual leadership " . He received a $26 million severance

package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence...

 

Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a

gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten

tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing

beside them, shouting pleas to come out and give himself up...

 

An Illinois man pretending to have a gun kidnapped a motorist and

forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines. The

kidnapper then proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts...

 

A 9-year-old boy in Manassas, Virginia received a one-day suspension

under his elementary school's drug policy last week - for Certs! Joey

Hoeffer allegedly told a classmate that the mints would make him " jump

higher. " And a student in Belle, West Virginia was suspended for three

days for giving a classmate a cough drop. School principal Forest Mann

reiterated the school's " zero-tolerance " policy...not to be confused

with the " zero-intelligence " policy...

 

..b

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