I am not 'self'-less.

[Guest guest]

In my sleep, I get many dreams...

pleasant dreams, unpleasant dreams,

happy dreams, unhappy dreams, dream of

win, dream of loss... of fear, of sex,

of lust, of greatness, of contentment,

of beauty...

 

All I seem to miss is... Choice. In my

dreams, I seem to have no say, no

choice. Dreams just happen to me, I

don't get to " choose " them.

 

In my waking hours, without a

foreground 'i'... my condition seems to

be the same. Things [dream] happen and

I remain a muteness witness. Just like

I " can " go to sleep; I discovered that

I can also put my 'i' to sleep without

having to sleep physically. I can put

my 'i' to sleep when I really feel it is

'safe' to do so, just as in physical

sleep. Yet, I don't do it 24 hours a

day and I don't do it 7 days a week. In

fact, I have rarely been this way for more

than 1-2 hours at a time. I realize

that I am not a 'self'-less man and I

wanted to experiment with being a

'self'-less man... maybe for a week..

 

 

I found following technique* taught

by Papaji greatly impressive:

 

http://www.realization.org/page/doc1/doc108b.htm

 

Papaji says:

 

When the 'I' wakes up, everything else

wakes up. While this 'I' was sleeping

during the sleep state, everything was

quiet. If you don't touch the 'I' which

woke up, you will experience the

happiness of sleep while you are awake

 

 

 

 

 

----

* Do it for one single second, half of a

single second, a quarter of a single

second. Don't touch the 'I'. The 'I' is

something that we can well afford to be

without. Don't touch the 'I' and tell

me if you are not sleeping.

 

 

Interviewer: That is right. In that

instant, everything is like a dream.

 

Papaji: This is called waking while

sleeping and sleeping while awake. You

are always in happiness, always awake.

This awakening is called Knowledge,

Freedom, Truth.

[Guest guest]

[...]

 

> I realize

> that I am not a 'self'-less man and I

> wanted to experiment with being a

> 'self'-less man... maybe for a week..

 

 

I believe that most people who have

been interested in spirituality for a

while would understand this. Many

people who have been in this state

before, can easily co-relate to it and

perhaps, also those who have been under

influence of some drugs, 'medicines',

tranquilizers, sedatives or

anesthetics.

 

 

Without an 'i', everything seems

like a dream. Being without 'i' is like

dreaming with open eyes. Everything

happens and I am just a witness. I

noticed that 'being a witness', 'living

in now', 'being without ego, 'no

choice', 'surrender'... all of them

basically talk about the same thing.

 

 

It is not 'i' is dead in that state;

it is merely sleeping and it does

periodically wakes up like a

reminder*... a 'reminder' like a

periodic urge to smoke or have a cup of

coffee or to take a walk. I can either

use this reminder to wake the 'i' up or

to let it sleep again... just like I

can decide to have a cup of coffee or

not when the periodic urge comes. This

way, 'i' works just like any other

'habit', any other... 'conditioning'.

And, after all, it is said that 'i' is

nothing but 'conditioned thinking'!

 

 

 

-----

 

* I suspect a very similar periodic

'reminder' takes place during physical

sleep too... and, this is how I am able

to physically wake up pretty much any

time I want.

 

 

 

> ----

> http://www.realization.org/page/doc1/doc108b.htm

> ...

> Don't touch the 'I' and tell

> me if you are not sleeping.

>

>

> Interviewer: That is right. In that

> instant, everything is like a dream.

>