Kshama -Forgiveness - one of the Divine Qualities !

[Guest guest]

Dear All !

 

The spring season is just a few weeks away.(In some parts of the

world,VASANT RITU is already in full swing) We are now entering the

Season of Beauty and Joy! The Tulips are already in full bloom !This

is the season when Mother Nature looks her best , adorned like a new

Bride !Love in in the Air ! If you are wondering how to spend those

long evenings , here is a thought ! How about spending time reading

the Srimad Bhagavat Gita chapter by chapter! Bhakti is like the

Tulip ! You sow the seeds in one season to reap the benefits the

next Season!

 

May i pleaee recall verse 1 of chapter 16?

 

16. The Divine And Demoniac Natures

TEXT 1-3

 

sri-bhagavan uvaca

abhayam sattva-samsuddhir

jnana-yoga-vyavasthitih

danam damas ca yajnas ca

svadhyayas tapa arjavam

 

ahimsa satyam akrodhas

tyagah santir apaisunam

daya bhutesv aloluptvam

mardavam hrir acapalam

 

tejah ksama dhrtih saucam

adroho nati-manita

bhavanti sampadam daivim

abhijatasya bharata

 

 

The Blessed Lord said: Fearlessness, purification of one's

existence, cultivation of spiritual knowledge, charity, self-

control, performance of sacrifice, study of the Vedas, austerity and

simplicity; nonviolence, truthfulness, freedom from anger;

renunciation, tranquility, aversion to faultfinding, compassion and

freedom from covetousness; gentleness, modesty and steady

determination; vigor,* forgiveness*, fortitude, cleanliness, freedom

from envy and the passion for honor--these transcendental qualities,

O son of Bharata, belong to godly men endowed with divine nature.

 

Today , it is my pleasure to take up the quality of 'Forgiveness' or

Kshama !

 

In this context , i would like to narrate an incident from

Mahabharata.

 

It was a grim scene at the BATTLEFIELD in Kurukshetra. Draupadi had

lost all her five (?) sons. She was grief stricken. At that time ,

the Pandavas brought before Draupadi the wounded body

of 'Ashwatama', the only son of Dronacharya . Bheema asks Draupadi '

Beloved! Just say YES ! and i will shatter ASHWATAMA'S BODY into

thousand pieces with my mighty Mace . Nakula and Sahadeva also plead

with Draupadi ' dear one! please allow us to pierce Ashwatama's body

with our Bow and Arrow . Draupadi listens to her husbands but wisdom

prevails and she is overwhelmed by a sense of compassion. She looks

at her husbands and says " True ! It was i who instigated you all to

take up arms against the Kauravas to take revenge for the dishonor

commited to me. i have already paid a heavy price for this . I have

lost all my sons in the Battlefield , including my favorite Son ,

Abhimanyu. Ashwatama is the only son of Gautami , Dronacharya's

wife . Dronacharya is also dead , i do not want Gautami to suffer a

worse fate than this . i do not want Gautami to lose the support of

her son also - she is already a widow. So saying . She asks the

pandavas to spare the life of Ashwatama.

 

When Sri Krishna heard this, he was thrilled and he exclaimed ' O!

Draupadi!Your other name is Krishnaa ( sister of Lord Krishna -

another name for Durga - Draupadi is a nincarnation of Durga) ! True

to your name , you have shown extreme compassion and you have

demonstrated 'forgiveness' - the great quality in a woman , more so

in a Mother. " Yes! if you recall Lord Krishna also forgave the

hunter who shot an arrow at his foot.

 

Vasant Nvaratri is just round the corner. Let us resolve to practice

all these Divine qualities one by one each nine days - on the Tenth

day , let Sattwa prevail over tamas and Rajas!

 

So, folks ! Remember ...

 

" Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heal that

has crushed it. --Mark Twain

 

love and blessings

[Guest guest]

Pranams

Thank you for that beautiful message.

Forgiveness is one of the qualities we find hardest to develop.

 

Most of the time we are unable to be forgive because we feel our hurt,

our resentment, our anger, our hatred is justified. Justified by what?

by the other person's actions.

 

The trouble is this - the action " was " the " other's " and the negative

feelings " is " " mine " - its my mind which is tied up in the threads of

hurt, my heart which still smolder with the embers of a fire that

should have been put out a long time ago.

 

Forgiveness is about letting go.

I recognize there is a poison in my heart. It needs to be purged.

There is nothing I can do about the past. What I can do is make my

present more fragrant so my future becomes more meaningful. And the

smokescreen that is erected by my firm holding on to the past is never

going to allow my present to manifest its fragrance. A firm and gentle

goodbye to the past is what is in my own self-interest.

 

Forgiveness is about understanding. Whatever any one does is because

that particular individual at that point in time in those peculiar set

of circumstances could have done that and that only. This is because

whether we like it or not, there is a perfect Order that is set in

place here, and everything that happens is ever in accordance with

that Order alone. The other person's actions are no doubt heinous. But

perhaps if i had the upbringing that he or she did, the temperament,

the value structure, the social environment etc etc then my own

actions may have been exactly the same.

 

Forgiveness is about acceptance. The past is a ghost. It has no

existence save our remnances. There is nothing about it i can change.

What i can do is wish it goodbye and move on. The present is ever

here, every moment, waiting for me. To embrace it, i need to accept

the death of the past. There is ever a resistance towards forgetting

the past. This resistance stifles my growth as an individual.

Resisting this resistance only creates more resentment. Acceptance is

the only antidote to the poison of resistance and forgiveness is the

only key to acceptance.

 

Forgiveness is about learning. We often mistake that by forgiving we

will not learn from our mistakes. The truth is to the exact contrary.

Forgiveness helps us be objective about the past. It removes our

negatively distorted view about things. We see why things turned out

the way they did and what we can do to prevent this from happening in

the future to the extent possible. We have to learn to forgive and

forgive to learn.

 

Forgiveness is about being strong. In the words of Mahatma Gandhi " The

weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. "

It takes courage to forgive. It takes a mature outlook that is not

afraid to let go. Deep inside we are afraid to let go of the

unpleasant - there is fear of this loss. Overcoming this fear takes

courage and strength.

 

From a vedantic perspective, the person who has caused you hurt has in

a way done you a favor. He has helped you examine your own capacity to

hate, to be angry, he has helped test your mettle, your capacity to

act and not react, he has helped measure the depths of your forgiving

spirit. After all only pain can help you guage your capacity to

withstand pain. Moreover pain and hurt much more than pleasure is what

motivates man to enquire, to reflect, to seek.

 

On a final note, forgiveness applies most importantly to one-self.

Self-forgiveness is an extremely important quality esp for a student

of vedanta. As a severely limited ignorant entity, i am guilty of an

infinite number of transgressions of omission and comission, many

known and most unknown. There are so many things i knowingly did

wrong, people I knowingly hurt, or perhaps did care enough about, or

said the wrong things to, etc etc. Is it ever possible for me to

settle accounts with each and every one of them? Most are no longer in

my life, some may no longer be in this world. How am I do purge myself

of this guilt? For the same negatives that we associate with hurt are

exactly applicable to guilt. There is fortunately one way to settle

the score. And that is Ishwara. Settle our accounts with Ishwara and

in one sweep we settle our infinite debts. " O All-Knowing Lord, in my

ignorance have i been guilty of multiple acts of omission and

commission in body, speech and mind. O Ocean of compassion, forgive

them " " karacharaNakRitaM vaakkaayajaM karmajaM vaa

shravaNanayanajaM vaa maanasaM vaa.aparaadham; vihitamavihitaM vaa

sarvametatkshmasva jaya jaya karuNaabdhe shrii mahaadeva shambho "

This acknowledgement of our own incapacity slowly frees us from the

sense of our " do-ership " . This in turn helps us accept the present

with cheer and accept the future without pervasive anxiety. What we

get and will receive will be nothing but His prasad, the very fruits

of my own past deeds which are being bestowed on me by His Order and

my only prayer to Him is strength, that i may accept them - with cheer.

 

A cheerful accepting mind and disposition has been always considered a

MUST for any student who wishes to proceed along the delicate path of

self-enquiry.

 

Thus is forgiveness one of the most treasured qualities that a sincere

seeker of the truth would do well to nourish and nurture.

 

Hari OM

Shri Gurubhyo namah

Shyam

 

 

 

 

 

advaitin , " dhyanasaraswati "

<dhyanasaraswati wrote:

>

> Dear All !

> Today , it is my pleasure to take up the quality of 'Forgiveness' or

> Kshama !

[Guest guest]

Shri Gurubhyo Namah

Shri Bhavanishankaraya Namah

 

Dhyanasaraswati ji thanks for starting this discussion thread and Shyamji

thank you for your wonderful explanation of this divine quality - kshama.

 

Indeed, what a happy coincidence!!

 

In Mumbai, Smt. Jaya Row is currently giving a discourse on Chapter XVI of the

Bhagavad Gita - Divine and Demonic Qualities. While explaining the divine

quality of " kshama " , Smt. Row mentioned that understanding and acceptance is at

the heart of the quality of kshama - forgiveness. In this context, reference was

made to verse 28 of Chapter III of the Bhagavad Gita where the Lord says -

 

tattva-vit tu maha-baho

guNa-karma-vibhagayoh

guNa guNeshu vartanta

iti matva na sajjate

--- Verse 28, Chapter III

 

Smt. Row highlighted " guNa guNeshu vartante " and said that whenever someone

does or says anything that hurts you or angers you, to just remember this phrase

and say to yourself, it is okay, whatever anyone does is because of their guNas,

just accept it and do not get flustered. She continued - do not try to change

others, change begins with ourselves.

 

Interested Advaitins in Mumbai may wish to attend Smt Row's discourse at the

Bhaidas Auditorium in Vile Parle between 6:30 and 8 PM; last discourse is on

March 3.

 

Pranams

 

Mangesh

 

 

shyam_md <shyam_md wrote:

Pranams

Thank you for that beautiful message.

Forgiveness is one of the qualities we find hardest to develop.

 

Most of the time we are unable to be forgive because we feel our hurt,

our resentment, our anger, our hatred is justified. Justified by what?

by the other person's actions.

 

The trouble is this - the action " was " the " other's " and the negative

feelings " is " " mine " - its my mind which is tied up in the threads of

hurt, my heart which still smolder with the embers of a fire that

should have been put out a long time ago.

 

Forgiveness is about letting go.

I recognize there is a poison in my heart. It needs to be purged.

There is nothing I can do about the past. What I can do is make my

present more fragrant so my future becomes more meaningful. And the

smokescreen that is erected by my firm holding on to the past is never

going to allow my present to manifest its fragrance. A firm and gentle

goodbye to the past is what is in my own self-interest.

 

Forgiveness is about understanding. Whatever any one does is because

that particular individual at that point in time in those peculiar set

of circumstances could have done that and that only. This is because

whether we like it or not, there is a perfect Order that is set in

place here, and everything that happens is ever in accordance with

that Order alone. The other person's actions are no doubt heinous. But

perhaps if i had the upbringing that he or she did, the temperament,

the value structure, the social environment etc etc then my own

actions may have been exactly the same.

 

Forgiveness is about acceptance. The past is a ghost. It has no

existence save our remnances. There is nothing about it i can change.

What i can do is wish it goodbye and move on. The present is ever

here, every moment, waiting for me. To embrace it, i need to accept

the death of the past. There is ever a resistance towards forgetting

the past. This resistance stifles my growth as an individual.

Resisting this resistance only creates more resentment. Acceptance is

the only antidote to the poison of resistance and forgiveness is the

only key to acceptance.

 

Forgiveness is about learning. We often mistake that by forgiving we

will not learn from our mistakes. The truth is to the exact contrary.

Forgiveness helps us be objective about the past. It removes our

negatively distorted view about things. We see why things turned out

the way they did and what we can do to prevent this from happening in

the future to the extent possible. We have to learn to forgive and

forgive to learn.

 

Forgiveness is about being strong. In the words of Mahatma Gandhi " The

weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. "

It takes courage to forgive. It takes a mature outlook that is not

afraid to let go. Deep inside we are afraid to let go of the

unpleasant - there is fear of this loss. Overcoming this fear takes

courage and strength.

 

From a vedantic perspective, the person who has caused you hurt has in

a way done you a favor. He has helped you examine your own capacity to

hate, to be angry, he has helped test your mettle, your capacity to

act and not react, he has helped measure the depths of your forgiving

spirit. After all only pain can help you guage your capacity to

withstand pain. Moreover pain and hurt much more than pleasure is what

motivates man to enquire, to reflect, to seek.

 

On a final note, forgiveness applies most importantly to one-self.

Self-forgiveness is an extremely important quality esp for a student

of vedanta. As a severely limited ignorant entity, i am guilty of an

infinite number of transgressions of omission and comission, many

known and most unknown. There are so many things i knowingly did

wrong, people I knowingly hurt, or perhaps did care enough about, or

said the wrong things to, etc etc. Is it ever possible for me to

settle accounts with each and every one of them? Most are no longer in

my life, some may no longer be in this world. How am I do purge myself

of this guilt? For the same negatives that we associate with hurt are

exactly applicable to guilt. There is fortunately one way to settle

the score. And that is Ishwara. Settle our accounts with Ishwara and

in one sweep we settle our infinite debts. " O All-Knowing Lord, in my

ignorance have i been guilty of multiple acts of omission and

commission in body, speech and mind. O Ocean of compassion, forgive

them " " karacharaNakRitaM vaakkaayajaM karmajaM vaa

shravaNanayanajaM vaa maanasaM vaa.aparaadham; vihitamavihitaM vaa

sarvametatkshmasva jaya jaya karuNaabdhe shrii mahaadeva shambho "

This acknowledgement of our own incapacity slowly frees us from the

sense of our " do-ership " . This in turn helps us accept the present

with cheer and accept the future without pervasive anxiety. What we

get and will receive will be nothing but His prasad, the very fruits

of my own past deeds which are being bestowed on me by His Order and

my only prayer to Him is strength, that i may accept them - with cheer.

 

A cheerful accepting mind and disposition has been always considered a

MUST for any student who wishes to proceed along the delicate path of

self-enquiry.

 

Thus is forgiveness one of the most treasured qualities that a sincere

seeker of the truth would do well to nourish and nurture.

 

Hari OM

Shri Gurubhyo namah

Shyam

 

advaitin , " dhyanasaraswati "

<dhyanasaraswati wrote:

>

> Dear All !

> Today , it is my pleasure to take up the quality of 'Forgiveness' or

> Kshama !

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Any questions? Get answers on any topic at Answers. Try it now.

 

 

[Guest guest]

Dear Shyam-Ji:

 

Thank you for your insightful and beautiful messages. We all need to

hear such words and reflect on them and assimilated these in our

consciousness. I would be happy to add your post to my blog if you wish.

The following two posts on luthar.com focus on Ahimsa for those

interested.

 

tag/ahimsa/page/5/

tag/ahimsa/page/3/

 

Namaste and love to all

Harsha

 

 

shyam_md wrote:

> Forgiveness is one of the qualities we find hardest to develop.

>

>