Mazie recovers.

[Guest guest]

Namaste Mazie et al, Great news for you!

 

How long did you have stenosis? I have been diagnosed with stenosis

at the back of my neck, perhaps due to a past auto accident. I have

some numbing of arms etc after sleeping etc. I don't seem that

worried about it as I cancelled a visit to the neurosurgeon as it

was early days yet.

 

With regard to fear of death, my fear has all but disappeared. I had

to put my dog down recently Jai-Jai, a Shih-Tzu, was two weeks short

of 16 years and had slept on our bed all that time. I had seen him

overcome various problems, operations etc stoically during his life.

I was quite surprised at the grief that I felt as I had been through

this in my younger days with a wife dying and a child also. I was

not prepared for the emotional overwhelming of my intellect so

easily. I suppose the samskaras and vasanas had become deeply

ingrained over a period of time.

 

I'm just about through it now, however after witnessing his death in

the vets, and how easily the jiva left his body after the injection

it had an effect on me. As when my little daughter died so many

years ago, my reaction was 'I can do that', die that is. All fear

of death seems to have completely disappeared. It seems Jai-Jai was

my Brahmin's Cow as in the Krishna story where he killed the

Brahmin's cow as it was preventing his Moksha. I'm not saying I'm

ready for Moksha today, but I have a deeper understanding of

Sankara's statement that death is just separation from our

attachments. Love and attachment being different altogether. So now

I have a deeper acceptance of what surrender means, and also how

unreal the whole situation really is. However as long as there is an

ego there will always be a build up of vasanas and samskaras. One

has to be vigilant and in the end Who am I is the only solution, for

me or anyone.........Om Namah Sivaya..........Tony.