Arthur Osborne - I become a writer...(4)

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My wife was not with me at all constantly in Madras.

The children were still at school in the hills and expected her

to spend the hot months there with them, and she also wanted

to stay some time at Tiruvannamalai. We had had difficulty

with accommodation and so now, while I was at Madras, she

built a house there. She had firm faith that we should eventually

be able to retire and settle down there, unlikely as it seemed at

the time. She engaged no architect and drew up no blueprints,

just told the masons what to do next, and yet it turned out a

delightful little house, beautiful and compact, a palace the size

of a doll’s house.

 

I have told elsewhere the story of Bhagavan’s long and painful

illness and his leaving the body (see my Ramana Maharshi and

the Path of Self-Knowledge) and will not repeat it here. In 1949

and 1950 my wife, like other devotees, was reluctant to leave

Tiruvannamalai longer than necessary. I used to go for occasional

weekends and holidays. I was there on the occasion of one of the

operations. Immediately after it, Bhagavan’s couch was carried

out on to the veranda of the dispensary where the operation took

place. He looked exhausted. I ascended the few steps. He had not

known that I was in Tiruvannamalai and as I came before him

his face lit up with a smile of radiant beauty. I stood there, looking

at him, overwhelmed by what transpired, by the undeserved grace.

We were there when he left the body, in April 1950.

 

After that every one seemed anxious to get away. The place became

deserted. I was able to stay for a few days and then my leave

expired. My wife stayed on. Neither of us felt any gloom, any

vacuum. The whole place was radiant with his presence. Never

had the vibration of peace been so pervasive or so powerful. He

had said: “They say that I am going away, but where can I go? I

am here.” The ‘here’ is universal, the infinite here and now of

the Spirit; but it also meant Tiruvannamalai, as it had in his

body’s lifetime. Gradually others also began to feel it and to

come back and the place filled up again. New devotees also

began to be drawn there, both from India and abroad, and the

movement has continued...............

 

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* Arthur Osborne: My Life & Quest *

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