Letters from Sri Ramanasramam 14

[Guest guest]

12th December, 1945

 

CONVENTIONAL RESPECT

 

One morning, during the usual conversations the topic

turned on Bhagavan's mother coming away to live with him

and on her manner of life, and Bhagavan spoke to us as

follows:

" Mother began coming here frequently and staying with

me for long periods. You know I always address even beasts

and birds in a respectful manner. In the same way, I used to

address Mother also with the respectful form of speech. It

then occurred to me that I was doing something hurtful. So

I gave up the practice and began addressing her in the

familiar way. If a practice is natural and has become habitual

you feel uncomfortable at changing it. But anyway what do

these bodily things matter? " He spoke with deep feeling and

my eyes filled with tears.

 

Before the dawn of youth appeared on his face he

had relinquished all worldly desires, and with Divine

desire he hastened to the holy Arunachala where he reigns

in the Kingdom of Eternal Bliss. How can one speak of

the enormous fortune of that mother, in having had the

privilege of being called `Amma' (mother) by such a son?

In the Vedas, the mother holds the first claim for worship:

" Mathru devo bhava " (Let mother be your God). Even so,

the beauty of it is that Bhagavan felt it unnatural for him

 

to address her in the respectful form. If he addressed her

so, would she not feel hurt? She felt satisfied only if he

addressed her as " Mother. " Perhaps Bhagavan felt that

he ought not to wound her feelings in so small a matter.

" When my Mother passed away I thought I had escaped

bondage and could freely move from place to place and live

in solitude in some cave or other, but in fact I have now an

even greater bondage; I cannot even move out. " Bhagavan

often speaks in this way. Mother he had only one, but

children he has in thousands, so is not this greater bondage?

I tell you, the other day, hearing that Skandasramam was

being repaired, he went there at noon, along with his

attendant Rangaswami, just to see, without telling anybody,

intending to return quietly. But what happened? We all went

there, wild with excitement and surrounded him, and would

not allow him to move. It was only with great difficulty that

he managed to return with the whole crowd by about 8 p.m.

 

A fortnight later, the labourers reported to Bhagavan

that they had finished constructing the path to

Skandasramam and begged him to have a look at it.

Bhagavan said, " We shall see. " That morning we all

expressed our keen desire to go there. Bhagavan cajoled

us, saying, " We will all go there for a picnic some time

later. " Then in the evening at about 5 o'clock he went out

as usual for his walk on the hill and from there slipped

away quietly to Skandasramam. As soon as this became

known, men and women alike began going up the hill

with torches and lanterns regardless of the approaching

darkness. It was one thing for people who do not know

Bhagavan's ways to follow him up the hill, but I thought

that I, who knew how things were, ought not to go. Twice

I started to go up and returned after reaching the first

turning, but finally I could not resist the temptation to

follow the crowd. Just as the monkey cannot change its

nature, however we cajole it, so my mind's natural

tendencies reasserted themselves, however much I tried

to control them. What is the use of being sorry about it

afterwards?

 

Actually, when all his children came up like that in the

darkness, how grieved Bhagavan must have felt that there

was no place for them to sit and nothing for them to eat.

That is why in his overflowing kindness he later arranged a

regular feast for them all there. How could he manage this

enormous family but for his wonderful controlling ability?

How could he manage to be so detached even in the midst

of this big family were he not full of profound peace?

Remember, there is nothing beyond the power of the great

Master.