As the result of the enquiry the ego ceases to exist

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Day by Day with Bhagavan________21-11-45 NightFollowing Bhagavan's quotation from the Gita,Rishikesananda referred to a verse from Mandukya Upanishadin which the words adi and anta occur. Bhagavan took it outand explained the text, which says: "That which was not in thebeginning and which won't be at the end, but which is only inthe middle, can't be real. Only that can be real which is notonly in the middle, but also at the beginning and the end".Dr. Srinivasa Rao asked Bhagavan, "When we enquirewithin `who am I?' what is that?"Bhagavan: It is the ego. It is only that which makes thevichara also. The Self has no vichara. That which makes theenquiry is the ego. The `I' about which the enquiry is made isalso the ego. As the result of the enquiry the ego ceases toexist and only the Self is found to exist.I asked Bhagavan, "It seems this morning Rishikesanandaquoted some text which says wherever the mind goes, that issamadhi. How can that be? Our mind goes after whatever itlikes. Can that be samadhi?"Bhagavan: That passage refers to jnanis. Whatever theymay be doing, there is no break in their samadhi state. Theirbodies may be engaged in whatever activities they were intendedby prarabdha to go through. But they are always in the Self. Weassociate or identify ourselves with the body; whatever it does,we say we do. The Bhagavad Gita says, `The wise man willthink the senses move among the sense objects and be unattachedto the activities of the sense organs.' I would go farther and saythat the jnani does not think even that. He is the Self and seesnothing apart from himself. What the Bhagavad Gita says in theabove passage is for the abhyasi or the practiser. There is noharm in engaging in whatever activities naturally come to one.The hindrance or bondage is in imagining that we are the doersand attaching ourselves to the fruits of such activities.In this connection Bhagavan also said, "A man says `Icame from Madras'. But in reality `he' did not come. Thejutka or some other vehicle brought him from his house to therailway station, the train brought him to Tiruvannamalairailway station, and from there some other cart brought himhere. But he says `I came'. This is how we identify ourselveswith the acts of the body and the senses." Bhagavan also quotedfrom the Vedanta Chudamani to the effect that the activitiesof the jnani are all samadhi, i.e. he is always in his real state,whatever his body may happen to be doing. Bhagavan alsoreferred to Rajeswarananda and said that once he planned totake a big party of pilgrims with Bhagavan in their midst.Bhagavan said, "I did not consent to go and the thing had tobe dropped. What is there I could go and see? I see nothing.What is the use of my going anywhere?" (non-english script) This is one of those self-revealing statements,which sometimes escape Bhagavan's lips.(to be concluded)