Commitment phobia: astrological factors?

February 16, 2009

Dear Alpana,

You are talking about romantic relations and commitment.

It is very difficult to make interpretations from the horoscopes.

Mostly we make interpretations after the incedent has occured.

Otherwise also it is very comlex emotinal game.

I have analysed several charts with KP astrology on these aspects.

Mostly I have seen that if some affair fails due to lack of

commitment or some other problem, it is generally 5th house connected

to 4th or/and 10th house.

Most beautiful live-in (without marriage) relationships are seen when

5th connectes with 6th[12th to 7th] and 11th and also 9th house.

Disappointments , pain and troubles are seen with reference to

connections with 8th house.

Certainly the personality has to be judged with Lagna and Moon. Ant

you have also to see the dasa/bhukti/antras running and transits.

Inder

, " Alpana Agarwal "

<alpsice wrote:

>

> Dear Inderji and SRSji,

>

> RRji's interpretation is the one I meant. Commitment phobia is not a

> phobia in the literal sense of the word. It was a term coined to

> describe a behaviour that is observed in some people's attitudes

> towards (specifically) romantic relationships. Here are some of the

> characteristics of so-called commitment phobic people from a

website:

>

> 1. Commitment phobic people are tortured souls full of FEAR. They

are

> in a constant state of emotional conflict because of their negative

> irrational beliefs about love, commitment and relationships. In

> relationships they create great confusion, havoc, pain, and anguish

as

> their behaviours are often insensitive, unpredictable and bizarre.

>

> 2. They usually have a history of short relationships and they may

> never have been married - there is often an excuse that they haven't

> met the right woman, or they justify their history by saying they

> still have plenty of time to settle down as they can have children

at

> any age. A favourite line is " someday " .

>

> 3. If they have been married it is likely to have been for a short

> time, or, if they have been in a long term relationship or marriage,

> they will usually have a history of infidelity

>

> 4. They want a relationship but they also want freedom and space so

> they are often attracted to long distance relationships and busy

> independent women.

>

> 5. They often choose men/women who are not the type of partner they

> are looking for, for example they may be much older, much younger,

> married, or they may have different interests. They use these

> differences as excuses to end relationships.

>

> 6. A commitment phobic won't allow the relationship to grow and

they

> have no intentions of ever doing so.

>

> This article was written with men in mind, bcoz more men than women

> are supposed to be scared of commitment. But women too can show this

> kind of behaviour. The cause could me anything from needing a lot of

> space, being scared of relationships because of past hurts and

> disappointments, or because of fear of failure or making a wrong

> decision and being stuck with it for life. But the end result is

> making a commitment becomes very difficult for such a person.

>

> This is seen more in western cultures, or where dating is more

common.

> But I have a gut feeling that a lot of people who get married late

> might be having similar issues which get disguised as looking for

the

> perfect partner etc.

>

> , " Rohiniranjan "

> <rohini_ranjan@> wrote:

> >

> > SRS ji,

> >

> > As briefly touched in an earlier message in this thread, let us

move

> > away from the literal term phobia as used in mental health

context.

> > The original question in this thread with examples etc given by

> > Alpana very clearly indicates that it was about " reluctance

towards

> > making a committment " or loosely 'fear of making a committment'.

I

> > think that is where phobia entered and became a nail in this

cyber-

> > wall over which we are all hanging our thinking caps.

> >

> > I do not believe it is a simple enough concept to pin it to a

planet

> > or a rashi or varga or yoga or even houses. The same person who

may

> > have difficulty in committing to a relationship can be highly

> > committed to a project or own work or tuesday evening bhajan

mandali

> > and temple services etc.

> >

> > Many inventors for instance have been associated with uranus for

> > instance and while they may forget to bring chocolates to their

girl

> > friends, they rarely forget to water the genetic chimera they are

> > working on (the mango tree that walks!).

> >

> > Some astrologers and jyotishis give this impression that some

> > correlations between astro factors and a trait or event are

absolute

> > but after careful examination and repeated testing the magical

> > correlation seems to weaken if not vanish. I was reading PVR's

thread

> > recently in which he reminds all astrologers to test something in

> > dozens and not just a few chart before turning it into a firm

rule or

> > association. Wise words indeed.

> >

> > A general and global avoidance of responsibility is of course a

> > serious flaw and perhaps of great interest to forensic

psychologists,

> > but I do not believe this thread was ever intended to discuss

those.

> > Of course Alpana alone could corroborate for we all just go by

our

> > interpretations and not always can everyone be right.

> >

> > RR

> >

> > , RAMA SUBRAMANIAN

> > <srs81520@> wrote:

> > >

> > > It is necessary to make a clear distinction between phobia and

> > paranoia. While former is an ailment, the latter is born out of

> > delusions.