Marriage problems

[Guest guest]

Dear Sirs,

 

I am a victim of my own attitude but what to do I am

like that and not able to help. So, I request you all

to guide me and give me corrective remedies.

 

This has become the most serious issue of my life and

I am on the brink of breaking down. I got married to

Shweta on 29th June 2006 and from that day till today

there has not been a single day of peace among us. The

problem is mostly from my side. We got engaged in

March 2006 and from that time when I first met her in

Mumbai; I was not attracted towards her. There was no

feeling of attraction. Whenever I met her I felt she

is not the one. She never appealed to me. But I did

not have the guts to break engagement also thinking

that things will improve.

 

We got married but after 2 days only I had negative

feelings towards her. The main thing was her

complexion. I am a kind of person who likes Fair

girls. I don’t know why I said yes for marriage but I

have realized this fact that fair/white girl was so

very important in my life. Please don’t take it

otherwise but I am telling you my correct feelings.

She is not as fair as I am infact she is not fair at

all. Over and above I never like her personality,

posture, the way she walk and the way she talk. Though

we married but I always used to comment. Our whole

honeymoon was spoilt. I have never given her respect

of wife neither I have loved her. Though I have tried

to change myself but my focus never shifts from all

these things and I end up commenting on her thinking

she will improve some day. But 9 months have gone and

till date we never have good married life. And now

it’s like on the rocks. We have started fighting on

continuous basis and personal life is becoming totally

absurd.

 

Many a time I have told her to get separated and she

also agrees but I don’t have the guts for that also.

The family set up and society is like that and infact

I also want to give up chance but the thing is when

there is no attraction from day one and I don’t love

her, respect her as a person she is how will we live

together. From her side she tried initially to change

as per me but things don’t change if she is wheatish

in complexion she will remain the same. Now she is

also irritated and fed up with my behavior. Apart from

a couple of attitude problem and high temper she is a

good person.

 

Sir this is snapshot of what’s going on in one aspect

of my life though it has still not surfaced and all

the things are happening in four walls of our room.

Though I am under control but she is getting affected

emotionally.

 

As of now things are very bad and we are fighting on a

regular basis. Thing is very simple. She expects a lot

of love, respect from me which I am not been able to.

Believe me sir, even when I go out with her I am not

comfortable. What shall I do now? I cant change her –

the way she is, her color complexion, the way she

walks, she talks, the way she take things in life, her

attitude. I have problems with everything. She fights

on small comments on her. I know that I am not doing

justice to her and that’s why she might be behaving.

She never compromises on anything. Only one thing is

she is not bad.

 

Is there any remedy/solution like Puja, Vrata, Gems

any sort of things which will make things better among

us. Please suggest remedy for both of us. What can

make her attractive to me? Please suggest sirs. I

never expected my married life will be come hell like

this. Why is this happening to me?

 

Vivek

10th July 1978

Maunath Bhanjan

18.40

 

Shweta ( wife)

7th March 1982

Kalyan

9.40 am