I began... !!

[Guest guest]

I began...

 

As an ethereal idea incarnated into the now with passion.As a shared passion and sentiment between two young people.In moment of profound surrender between two lost as one.In a time when certainty was a luxury unafforded to youth & love.When promises seemed eternal, perfect, and enduring.When the future was hopeful and the present was understandable.With the sudden reality of my helplessness & blind faith in people.With the joys only a child understood & woes a child overlooked.

I began as a bound and free, released into the world.

I grew...

In a world that was the promise of a better tomorrow but not mineIn a time when sacrifices went unseen & seemingly unappreciatedIn the presence of family which even with distance feels closeTo appreciate the world around me and witness its many wondersTo love the wisdom of nature, the order of the stars, the LawTo seek out Truth, Goodness, & Beauty in things seen & unseenInto a young mind eager for secrets past, present, and futureInto a solitary youth by choice, but sociable by compulsionInto a competitive, humble, and conflicted boy trying to be a man

I grew a boy forging himself & his chains, and keys in the soul.

I discovered...

That as a young man I believed no one, least of all myselfIf I was wrong in so many things, the world must be erroneous That I was meant to be unfeeling to be a man, it made no senseIf I showed my feelings I was weak, and so I chose weaknessThat while I knew many things for others, I knew little for meIf focused on myself alone I would begin to feel selfish and aloneThat women made little sense at all to me when I had no senseIf love was a feeling, why was I always so damn numb always

I discovered the true sadness of cynicism, the elation of wonder.

I saw...

Promises and oaths broken and reforged, ashes and dustPeople walking lifelessly and I among them quickened by fearProblems soaked in hate, prejudice, pride, power, and fearPromises of a better world active in society, giving themselvesPeople fighting for a living, seeking peace in the shelter of loveProblems approached with reason and faith and progress made

I saw how much this world and its people mean to meI loved...

The fragility and strength I can achieve alone, I love Thelema.The effort of my family despite weakness and pride, I love Storge.The joys my fellow man can achieve despite pain, I love Philia.The good this Republic has done despite history, I love Patriotes.The lessons women have given me in gain & loss, I love Eros.The blessings and power of God"s grace in all things, I love Agape.

I loved seeing how Love is working quietly even now in me.

I became...

Priest, a man of faith, unafraid to show the world black & whitePoet, a man of inspiration, fearlessly bringing fire back into soulsRebel, a man of conflict, ever eager to discover & examine realityLover, a man of passion, devoted to Romance, Chivalry, and HeatProphet, a man of vision, firm but fair in his perceptions of vanityDoctor, a man of healing, eager to set right the desolation of FearTeacher, a man of counsel, humble to know when he knows notSoldier, a man of courage, taking a stand for what is true and justSon, a man of God and Men, flesh seeking spirit, spirit lifting fleshKing, a man of destiny and power, raised to rule himself before all.

I became who I was meant to be.. Me.