For the Sake of the Better Half

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Srimate SrivanSatakopa Sri Vedanta Desika yatindra Mahadesikaya nama:

 

 

 

For the Sake of The Better Half

 

 

 

Tales of Kings and Queens are indeed fascinating. Most of us must

have listened to our grandparents or parents recounting to us absorbing

anecdotes of this King or that. These tales were as enthralling as they were

informative, for the exploits, real and imaginary, of the Kings of yore used to

fire children with enthusiasm and inspiration.

 

 

 

What used be a recurring feature in such tales was the trouble to which the

Kings had to go, to wed damsels of their choice. We hear of Swayamvarams being

held to enable the princess choose her life mate, of competitions being held to

decide who would win the fair maid's hand. The romantic aspirant would be asked

to bring a flower dear to the damsel's heart, which would be blooming only once

a year and that too, on an inaccessible island beyond the seven seas, guarded

day and night by deadly dragons. Only the bravest and most enterprising would

even attempt such a venture and the successful Prince would indeed be a fit

candidate for the post of the princess' husband.

 

For winning Droupati's hand, Arjuna had to hit a moving target with an arrow,

looking only at its reflection in a pot of water. History and folklore are

replete with instances of princes being asked to exhibit their valour,

perseverance and resourcefulness, for bidding for the affections of the fair

princess. Thus the fair sex has always demanded of its suitors that they prove

their mettle, before the former would consent to matrimony.

 

 

 

When we mull over what troubles men have gone to over the ages to gain the

affections of women they love, we are surprised to find that even the Supreme

Lord is no exception to this requirement of having to prove Himself, for winning

the hand of Piratti, during His avataras. He might be the personification of

virility, bravery, handsomeness and magnificence-all these do not help Him, when

it comes to the question of bidding for Piratti's fair hand. Like any ordinary

mortal, He has to provide proof positive of His capabilities, before She would

consider wedlock with Him.

 

 

 

Consider, for instance, the Ramavatara. Lifting the mighty bow of Shiva and

fitting it with an arrow were considered to be extremely difficult, if not

impossible. The bow was so heavy that some rulers just staggered under its

weight and fell, while most could not move it at all. Though the cream of the

ruling class of the whole earth was represented at Sri Janaka's court on that

day, none could succeed in even lifting the bow, attesting to the arduousness of

the endeavour. Sri Janaka himself admits that the task he had set was impossible

of performance even by mighty devas, brawny asurAs, beefy rAkshasAs, gandharvas,

KinnarAs or YakshAs. What to say then of puny mortals, who are absolutely no

comparison to the rAkshasAs who are veritable mountains of muscle?

 

" na Etat sura gaNA: na asurA na cha rAkshasA:

 

Gandharava Yaksha pravarA: sa Kinnara mahOragA:

 

Kva gati: mAnushANAm cha dhanushOsya prapooraNE

 

ArOpaNE samAyOgE vEpanE tOlanEpi vA "

 

This mighty bow of Shiva was so big and heavy that it had to be wheeled in on a

huge eight-wheeled barrow. And it took five thousand repeat five thousand men,

all strong as oxen, to pull the vehicle laden with the bow, with very great

difficulty.

 

 

 

Readers would appreciate that it was this formidable bow, which must have

weighed hundreds of tons, that Sri Rama, a budding youth of hardly fourteen

years, was expected to hoist and equip, if He was to win the hand of Sri

Mythily. Is this not proof enough that women have always played hard-to-get and

Piratti is no exception? That He did it playfully and that the huge bow could

not stand the pull of His hands and broke into pieces, ( " edutthadu kaNdAr,

ittradu kEttAr " says Kamban, attesting to the one swift and fluid motion in

which Sri DAsarati lifted the bow, pulled the drawstring, inserted the arrow and

broke the bow) are testimonies to His phenomenal strength and bravery, but are

irrelevant to this story. What this goes to demonstrate is that the Lord Himself

is no exception in having to compete for the attentions of Piratti and having to

prove Himself worthy of Her.

 

 

 

In the KrishnAvatAra too, it was no cakewalk for the Lord to wed Sri RugminI.

Having exchanged love letters and fixed up a rendezvous for eloping, the Lord

and His bride-to-be found themselves confronted by an army of irate princes led

by Rugmi, the brother-in-law to be of the Lord, who had no wish to be associated

in any fashion with the cowherd Krishna, leave alone giving his sister in

marriage to Him. There ensued a bloody battle, fought valiantly by both sides,

in which Sri Krishna emerged victor and proudly wed Sri RugminI. The point of

the matter is that Sri Krishna, the exalted Supreme Being that He was, still had

to go into battle and fight hard, to win the hand of His Consort.

 

 

 

Again in the same avatara, for wedding Sri Nappinnai, Emperuman had to undergo a

test of ability- " veerya sulkam " - that of conquering seven mighty bulls. Even

ordinary bulls are dangerous animals, as many a matador has found out to his

chagrin. Only those who have tried their hand at this hazardous sport would be

able to appreciate fully the feat of the Lord in taming not one but seven

ferocious bulls, for the ones Sri Krishna was asked to confront and conquer were

no ordinary animals, but the most virile specimens of the species. Azhwars are

so enamoured of this exploit of the Lord that they recount it numerous times-

" ErEl Ezhum adartthu " , " PinnaikkAi muttral muri Erin mun nindru moimbu

ozhitthAi " etc. Whereas even seasoned matadors never approach the bull from the

front, for fear of being gored by the deadly horns, Sri Krishna had no such

inhibition, faced the animals head on ( " mun nindru " ) and comprehensively

conquered them ( " moimbu ozhitthAi " ). Thus Sri Nappinnai was no exception to the

Divine Consorts' practice of putting the Lord through gruelling tests of bravery

and prowess, before she deigned to wed Him.

 

 

 

In most of the avataras, it is the same old story of the poor Lord being asked

to undertake Missions Impossible or engage in gory combat, to wed Piratti. Take

the KoormAvatAra now-Emperuman had to bear the unimaginable weight of the

Mantara Parvatam on His back, in the form of a giant turtle, to enable the DevAs

churn the Milky Ocean, with the snake VAsuki as a rope and the gigantic mountain

as churning rod. If you think that all this superhuman effort was undertaken by

the Lord merely to enable dEvAs to obtain nectar (and immortality thereby), you

are mistaken. It was all for the sake of Sri Mahalakshmi, who emerged from the

ocean as a result of all that intensive churning, that the Lord put up with the

monumental trouble and inconvenience. It is no easy joke to have a huge mountain

rest on your back, especially if the mountain were to move from side to side in

a churning motion, boring into your back all the time. If the Lord didn't think

much of all the effort, it was because He wanted His consort badly and no

trouble was too much in that regard. After all, He is the MAlOlan, enamoured

beyond measure with His exalted spouse.

 

 

 

It is the Lord's lot not only to go to extraordinary lengths to prove Himself

every time He weds His Consort, but also to confront countless challenges for

retaining or reclaiming Her. The best evidence in this regard is the

VarAhavatAra. Since Sri Mahalakshmi made the Lord go through the ordeal of

bearing the Mantara mountain on His back, BhoodEvi felt slighted and arranged

for a leela, by being abducted by the formidable HiranyAksha. The mighty asurA

just rolled up the earth and hid it at the bottom of the ocean, beyond the reach

of anyone. The Lord had to assume the form of a giant boar ( " MAnam ilA pandri " ),

battle valiantly with the asurA who was fortified by all sorts of boons, slay

him and rescue Mother Earth. BhoodEvi felt satisfied now, having had the Lord

take an avatara and considerable pains, on Her account. She was now even with

the Lord's principal Consort.

 

 

 

If you need another case in point, this time concerning the arcchAvatAra, you

need not look far-Srinivasa of the Seven Hills is still said to be reeling under

the burden of debt to KubEra, for the money He borrowed from the latter to meet

expenses of His marriage with Sri PadmAvati. (In a lighter vain) It would seem

that the phenomenal sums this Lord is gifted through the hundi, represent His

devotees' efforts to relieve Him of the age-old debt.

 

 

 

It would appear that having to perform impossible feats for winning the loved

one's hand is not confined to the Lord alone-it extends to His devotees too. Sri

Thirumangai Mannan is thus put to the onerous task of feeding a thousand

bhAgavatAs a day, as a precondition for wedlock with Sri Kumudavalli. The

extents to which Azhwar goes, raiding and robbing, waylaying and plundering,

defaulting on tributes due to the Emperor and being imprisoned for that, etc.,

all for the sake of winning Sri Kumudavalli's hand, are ample proof that women

have put not only the Lord but His votaries too to severe test, for granting

them the favour of matrimony.

 

 

 

It is indeed fortunate that the number of eligible bachelors today is less than

the maidens available, but for which we poor males might have to emulate the

Lord and go through all sorts of ordeals, to prove ourselves to prospective

better halves.

 

 

 

Srimate Sri LakshmINrsimha divya paduka sevaka Srivan Satakopa Sri Narayana

Yatindra Mahadesikaya nama:

 

Dasan, sadagopan