please tell me anything on this issue

[Guest guest]

Here's something a little different.

 

In the past I have encouraged people who find themselves addicted to

something (food is an example) to feel what they really want before

they indulge in their addiction. I suggested this for awareness. But

it is still too much of an intellectual exercise. We only get things

deeply through experience. Where is the statisfying experience of what

we really wanted?

 

There's a way I discovered recently. And I like it because there is no

introspection, just acceptance, just experience. It makes us realize

that the universe never takes anything away without giving us what we

really need! We then have a choice to focus on the withdrawal or what

is given. Say you take an old toy away from a kid and at the same time

offer them an upgrade. The kid has a choice to focus on the loss or

the gift.

 

For addictions, it works like this: You feel an urge for some food or

drink, for sex, or for money, for drug or for self-pity. You don't

give it to yourself. Now typically then we would feel the withdrawal,

the lack of satisfaction of a desire, we are missing something... but

all these " feelings " are really judgments on not having what we wanted

and indulging in those feelings prevents us from seeing that we are

also given something else. We are given emptiness. Now try this

experience with anything you expected but are not receiving: food,

money, the visit or the phone of a (possible)lover or friend. If you

are not receiving it, instead of focusing on the " not having " , tune in

to the emptiness it leaves in you and feel that, bathe in it, welcome

it. That emptiness feels quite warm and not scary at all. It has a

feeling of fullness. And it is quite nourishing. It is exactly what

you need in the moment. Stay with it as long as you can.

 

Tuning in to what is given every moment makes an ordinary moment extra

ordinary. Every moment is an opportunity for enlightenment.

 

Many blessings, Awtar

Rochester, NY