Soul Mates

[Guest guest]

I have been reading with relief almost, the stories here on soul mates meeting.

 

Last February I decided I needed to have some Reikki due to depression. I have

been a

spiritual seeker for about.. 15 years and find that Reikki is an experience that

is different

each time and can be mind blowing. I saw an advertisement and made an

appointment.

Three days before the appointment I was in the bus station in my town and

somehow

ended up in conversation (he started it) with a handsome man, mid 40's, long

hair, sort of

hippy like. We got onto the topic of spirituality and I said I had always wanted

to study

buddhism. He told me that he is a student of eastern religions and that he takes

buddhism

every thursday nights in town. I was.. excited. We shook hands and.. I found

myself

thinking a lot about him over the next two days. Three days after the meeting

with him I

had my Reikki session.

 

When she put her hands on me she immediately told me that I had many spirit

guides. I

didn't realize that Reikki was a window of sorts to becoming more psychic. This

was totally

unexpected. Then she asked if I had just met a man, three days ago (exactly) and

that his

name was Bill. I almost fell off the bed. That was his name. She said he had

found me

again; that we were soul mates. We had been together in a past life in India. We

had

wanted to marry but my father wouldn't let us as he was very poor. She said he

would

take me on the spiritual journey of my life.

 

I finally managed to get to a buddhist class three weeks later and, in my

outgoing way,

told him that I was told he was my soul mate. He doesn't believe in one soul

mate and

was.. cautious. But when I told him about taking me on a spiritual journey he

told me that

he was involved in a religion called Eckankar.

 

Well, to cut a long story short, we became friends, couldn't stop talking

talking talking. I

went to a few of his Eckankar meetings but.. it's not for me. I prefer Hinduism

or

Buddhism (Eckankar is somewhat like Hinduism actually but.. too many rules for

me). One

night we ended up in bed together and it was not the.. spiritual sex I imagined.

lol... He is

a very depressed man, I believe in part because of the problems with being

completely

bound by this religion, and in part because of things he wouldn't tell me. He

held me very

much at bay. Even physically he seemed to me to be ... in pain. I could feel

his pain. I

wanted so much to help him. By this time I was so in love with him that I

didn't care if he

was rich or poor, depressed or not. There was something about the way I felt

about him

(and still do) that I have never felt in my life.

 

The night we were together, sleeping next to him I had a dream that he was

having a book

sale. I was helping him puts the books outside his apartment building and he

showed me

one of the books. It had three letters on it (not ECK but.. some I couldn't

tell) and he told

me that it was the Life and Secrets of Bill. He told me that I would be able to

read it all

" tomorrow " . I woke up and he was next to me. I looked at him and asked when

the book

sale was starting. He of course, didn't have a clue what I was talking about.

It was a very

strange feeling.

 

He is back (or so he says) with his ex girlfriend and not willing to have any

relationship

with me. He has many many emotional issues and while I would have gladly helped

him

(helping myself I truly believe at the same time, he is wise in many ways) he is

not

interested and so I have moved to another city to be near my family.

 

The past five years have been very painful for me. I had hoped that in meeting

him I was

having a turn around in my life. Instead, this last summer I have had to make

my

teenagers live with my ex husband (who owes me lots of money through my divorce)

due

to not being able to afford to take care of them, as well as being emotionally

unstable for

a while (getting a little better).

 

I'm not sure really whether the relationship with my soul mate is over. The

Reikki master I

went to says that it's not. That we are going to be together. We have talked

briefly on the

phone since I left and he wanted my number but.. I'm not focusing on him. I have

to heal

my life before I can be with anyone else I believe. Sometimes it's easier to be

alone,

although the lessons in life come through others.

 

I meditate daily and have found a wonderful Kundalini dvd to do the kry's and

exercises

for Kundalini energy. I believe this is where I am supposed to focus my energy

on. I've

been told I am supposed to be a healer and have my Reikki 1. I'm in no rush

with anything

in my life anymore. Trying to savour the good things and understand the

difficulties.

 

Letting go of people is only temporary in my mind these days. I have lost

everything -

marriage, home, furnishing, money, jobs, and now my children (I see them only

occasionally and we were almost painfully close) and I know that in reality, it

doesn't stop.

The wheel of life goes on and those who are close to us keep coming back. It's

a comfort,

if only a small one at times.

[Guest guest]

Sat Nam Susan,

 

A very moving story full of highs and lows. It is very hard to lose everything

but think of it like cleaning out the garbage. Get rid of the old and get the

new.

 

It seems that you are at a state of rejuvenation. From what you write I presume

that it is time to start afresh with a new city. Think of it as a blessing.

Everything is always moving out of our reach you cannot hold onto things. Your

children for example are teenagers. You are their mother do not smother. Birds

always fly the nest. Look at the time that that you spent with them and cherish

it. Don't live in the past but more for now.

 

Do not look for happiness in other people. You yourself have to be happy first

to attract happiness. Make your own soul your soulmate. Souls do not mate they

only spend time together to be with any particluar soul light.

 

Blessings,

 

Goldie Singh.