nickname, birth name and numbers

[Guest guest]

Hi dear peole,

 

I'm asking for suggestions or inspirations about following situation:

 

For private reasons, I " changed " my name when I was 18 years old. I

mean, I didn't change it in my passeport, but completely in my life.

I am a woman but I chose a male name because at this time it was good

for me.

I'm carrying this name 25 years now. It is on all my bills, on my

taxes, by the bank, nobody call me different and people get rather use

to call me with a male name.

Some people ask when they meet me first, " is it your real name " , I

answer " Yes " and that's it.

 

In the last years, I don't feel that comfortable anymore. My new name

is my name, my old name is officially my name even if nobody use it.

If I was connected to a lie detector, I wouldn't know what to answer

to the question " what's your name? "

 

Now, I wanted to check my numbers, so I gave my new name and later

also my old name, just to know.

Because the results were totally different I'm quite confused.

 

My old name describe someone I would have like to be but I'm not. My

new name describe partly me, and partly someone I do not know.

 

As a person, I feel very much unaccomplished, somehow like a teenie in

an older body.

 

 

advice around?

 

 

thank you!

sat nam

 

saruj

 

 

(My yoga name is not in used in my daily life, only here.)

[Guest guest]

Dear Saruj Kaur:

 

First of all your name Saruj means lotus flower, if I am not mistaken.

What explanation did they give with your name when you received it?

 

If I am right it is a very feminine name, very spiritual name. Have

you seen Indian depictions of Gods sitting on a lotus flower?

 

Could you send your birth date?

 

More later!

Blessings,

Awtar Singh