Subpoenas of the Gods

[Guest guest]

Given the role of the ancient Vedic texts in the yoga we practice, I

thought this political situation involving some Gods from the Vedas

may interest some in this

 

----------------

 

http://www.reason.com/blog/show/123853.html

 

Subpoenas of the Gods

 

Jesse Walker | December 11, 2007, 11:16am

ramhanumanA Telegraph correspondent in India describes a dispute " over

ownership of a 1.4-acre plot in Dhanbad which adjoins a temple

dedicated to Ram and another one dedicated to the monkey god Hanuman. "

The priest claims to own the land, while the congregants say it

belongs to the gods themselves. To resolve the debate, a judge has

 

placed notices in newspapers...asking gods Ram and Hanuman to

appear in his court next week to present their arguments.

 

" You failed to appear in court despite notices sent by a messenger

and later through registered post. You are hereby directed to appear

before the court personally, " Judge Singh's notice stated.

 

The newspaper notices were published, in keeping with accepted

Indian legal practice, after two summons dispatched to the plaintiff

deities were returned because their addresses were " incomplete " .

 

In a parallel development,

 

Tweety may get a chance to take the witness stand and sing like a

canary. An Italian court ordered the animated mickeymousebird, along

with Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck and his girlfriend Daisy, to testify in

a counterfeiting case.

 

In what lawyers believe was a clerical error...the court summons

cites Titti, Paperino, Paperina, Topolino -- the Italian names for the

characters -- as damaged parties in the criminal trial of a Chinese

man accused of counterfeiting products of Disney and Warner Bros.

 

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Comments to " Subpoenas of the Gods " :

 

Add a comment & #8595;

 

Episiarch | December 11, 2007, 11:30am | #

And of course, the prosecution in the Italian case would ask " what

kind of Mickey Mouse operation are you running, anyway? "

 

Pro Libertate | December 11, 2007, 11:34am | #

I favor Hanuman's position, particularly given that today is the

holiest of holy days for him. . .Monkey Tuesday.

 

Lamar | December 11, 2007, 11:34am | #

US Courts have never been able to get personal jurisdiction over

Satan. Monkey gods are another story. How does one keep a straight

face when saying " monkey god " ?

 

Reinmoose | December 11, 2007, 11:37am | #

hold me, i'm scared.

 

Aresen | December 11, 2007, 11:42am | #

I hope Ram and Hanuman choose to appear manifest.

 

It would set a precedent for the other deities.

 

lunchstealer | December 11, 2007, 11:43am | #

How does one keep a straight face when saying " monkey god " ?

 

Lots of muscle relaxers and/or mood stabilizers.

 

Lamar | December 11, 2007, 11:45am | #

It seems lady luck has no mercy on monkeys....

 

Warren | December 11, 2007, 11:49am | #

There's no point in acting all surprised

about it. The plans and demolition orders

have been on display at your local planning

office in Alpha Centauri for fifty of your

Earth years, so you've had plenty of time

to lodge formal complaints.

 

What do you mean you've never been to

Alpha Centauri? Oh, for heaven's sake

mankind, it's only four light years away

you know. I'm sorry, but if you can't be

bothered to take an interest in local

affairs that's your own lookout.

 

ed | December 11, 2007, 11:50am | #

There is no god but Monkey, and Lancelot Link is his prophet.

 

Butt-head | December 11, 2007, 11:56am | #

So, like, if the court rules in Ram's favor, will they spank the monkey?

 

J sub D | December 11, 2007, 12:01pm | #

I kind of like this ruling. The judge is basically saying that if you

won't appear in court, you have no standing. He's just making sue that

the legal Ts and Is are crossed dotted. We have laws in this country

that require notice publication in certain civil cases, don't we?

 

iowan | December 11, 2007, 12:01pm | #

Too bad George Burns is unavailable.

 

joe | December 11, 2007, 12:18pm | #

Let's take up a collection, and pay somebody to release a monkey into

the countroom on the day of the hearing.

 

Then videotape it.

 

Episiarch | December 11, 2007, 12:27pm | #

joe wins prankster of the day.

 

crimethink | December 11, 2007, 12:30pm | #

Monkey gods are another story. How does one keep a straight face when

saying " monkey god " ?

 

I'm sure it sounds much more intimidating in the original Hindi.

 

Pro Libertate | December 11, 2007, 12:33pm | #

A monkey appearing in a courtroom will not suffice. What we need is a

guy in a gorilla suit, wearing Hanuman regalia. Is Rick Baker available?

 

The Prophet Koko | December 11, 2007, 12:44pm | #

As far as the tree branches are above the earth, so far are my feces

above your feces, says the Monkey God.

 

Pro Libertate | December 11, 2007, 12:48pm | #

It is rank heresy to speak of the Monkey God throwing his own feces.

No, as it is written, he throws the feces of Brahma.

 

Pro Libertate | December 11, 2007, 12:49pm | #

With apologies to any Hanuman worshipers--it's just so hard to resist

on Monkey Tuesday. Must. . .restrain. . .self.

 

sr2 | December 11, 2007, 1:04pm | #

MONKEY TUESDAY!!

 

(click it, g'head!)

 

mike | December 11, 2007, 1:52pm | #

What would happen to someone in a monkey god suit that showed up in

court to assert ownership of the land? Obviously in Sudan they would

cut his head off, but what would happen in India?

 

Lamar | December 11, 2007, 2:06pm | #

It would be comical, like when the ewoks worshipped 3PO.

 

BakedPenguin | December 11, 2007, 3:40pm | #

 

It would be comical, like when the ewoks worshipped 3PO.

 

Until the monkey got revenge!

 

Pro Libertate | December 11, 2007, 4:10pm | #

BP,

 

Ah, part of the award-winning Maneater Series™. With Oscar® winner, F.

Murray Abraham.

 

VM | December 11, 2007, 6:07pm | #

ProGLib, Baked:

 

was that the movie where FMA's character was fictionalized into a

scoundrelesque music teacher, who was driven to madness by the prodigy

Organ Grinder simian student?

 

At any rate, we have to beware of the Monkey. YEA, FORSOOTH! FEAR THE

MONKEY! Just ask Mr. Tallyman...

 

Pro Libertate | December 11, 2007, 6:18pm | #

VM,

 

Wolfgang Amamonkus Monkzart?

 

VM | December 11, 2007, 7:06pm | #

Genau!

 

(I think, however his middlename was Amazaius)

 

Pro Libertate | December 11, 2007, 7:17pm | #

Amazaius! Brilliant! Oh, man, that's got to be a Monkey Tuesday

posting. Amazaius by Moose Forman. A play about an orangutan composer.

Koko in a cameo?

 

Brilliant!