Guest guest Posted July 19, 2009 Report Share Posted July 19, 2009 Namaste everyone! Since I visited the Devi Mandir at the beginning of May, I have enjoyed tremendous progress on my spiritual journey. I am very grateful for this. However, I'm beginning to have problems with family members and friends who don't understand why or in what way I'm changing. Some see me as rejecting them or forgetting about them and don't understand vairagya in a positive light. How do I deal with THEIR emotional attachments to me as mine are falling away? Traditionally in India, people could leave and become sannyasis and never really deal with the familial ramifications of their egos melting. Many realized masters, at least for a time, separate themselves from their families or even leave them for good. I have a far way yet to full realization but that's my number one goal. For those of us who choose (wisely or otherwise) to stay in this society, how do we deal with the emotional needs of those who have relied on us in the past as we move beyond emotional attachments and vrttis? I'm sure many of you have had the same experiences I'm having. I'm less social and enjoy being at home with my books as much as possible. Some people don't encourage spiritual growth and so I'd rather not be around them too often while I'm trying to work on my sadhana and personal growth. I don't hate people, I just don't enjoy social situations as much as I enjoy the company of my self. How do you live in the world as your consciousness goes higher and higher and everything else just stays the same? I'd appreciate tapping in to the extensive reservoir of knowledge and experience this group has and compare notes. All my best, Manya (Michelle) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 19, 2009 Report Share Posted July 19, 2009 I think this is a very excellent question. It is something I will have to deal with as time goes by and in other contexts besides the spiritual it has happened to me in the past when my interests begin to diverge from the ones I held in common with important people in my past.I don't have an answer, but I really need one, since I can see the beginnings of the change of attitudes and change of habits within me that you are talking about, Michelle. I would like nothing better than to be able to spend most of my time worshipping and reading my scriptures. I have duty towards and I love my husband, but the things that he is so engaged in don't grab my attention as they would have in the past. I don't want to leave this life without making some spiritual progress. The most positive thing I possess in this relationship is that I began it with being honest about my religious path, so that there were little surprises for him in that matter. But it is beginning to go deeper, so I wonder how to deal with this change. How fortunate you are, that you have been able to visit Devi Mandir. I would love to be able to go, but I must wait until I am a permanent resident in Canada or risk not being able to return. I am crossing my fingers for next summer. Jai Maa! Jai Swamiji! Kumari--- On Sun, 7/19/09, weeshe83 <weeshe83 wrote: weeshe83 <weeshe83[www.ShreeMaa.org] Issues with living in the world Date: Sunday, July 19, 2009, 3:39 AM Namaste everyone!Since I visited the Devi Mandir at the beginning of May, I have enjoyed tremendous progress on my spiritual journey. I am very grateful for this. However, I'm beginning to have problems with family members and friends who don't understand why or in what way I'm changing. Some see me as rejecting them or forgetting about them and don't understand vairagya in a positive light. How do I deal with THEIR emotional attachments to me as mine are falling away?Traditionally in India, people could leave and become sannyasis and never really deal with the familial ramifications of their egos melting. Many realized masters, at least for a time, separate themselves from their families or even leave them for good. I have a far way yet to full realization but that's my number one goal. For those of us who choose (wisely or otherwise) to stay in this society, how do we deal with the emotional needs of those who have relied on us in the past as we move beyond emotional attachments and vrttis?I'm sure many of you have had the same experiences I'm having. I'm less social and enjoy being at home with my books as much as possible. Some people don't encourage spiritual growth and so I'd rather not be around them too often while I'm trying to work on my sadhana and personal growth. I don't hate people, I just don't enjoy social situations as much as I enjoy the company of my self. How do you live in the world as your consciousness goes higher and higher and everything else just stays the same? I'd appreciate tapping in to the extensive reservoir of knowledge and experience this group has and compare notes. All my best,Manya(Michelle) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 I didn't know you were a fellow Canadian, Kumari! Whereabouts are you calling home? I'm in Regina. It's a pity that bureaucratics are delaying what will be an amazing trip for you. But it will mean even more to you when you do get to go. I'm lucky to have a boyfriend who also understands my spiritual journey. He's very supportive and encouraging. I've always been extremely close with my family but it's becoming difficult lately. Although most of them are at least open to some new age kind of thinking, they're still very much attached to their egos and, in some cases, to mine. I know it's important to be compassionate and loving to the people in our lives but not at the expense of my personal growth. I think it's easier for people of Swamiji's or Shree Maa's caliber to not be affected by others as much. But I'm certainly no where near their level. I can definitely say I did not expect this when I started on this journey over 7 years ago. ~Manya (Michelle) , Joan Fisher <mjfisher2005 wrote: > > I think this is a very excellent question. It is something I will have to deal with as time goes by and in other contexts besides the spiritual it has happened to me in the past when my interests begin to diverge from the ones I held in common with important people in my past. > I don't have an answer, but I really need one, since I can see the beginnings of the change of attitudes and change of habits within me that you are talking about, Michelle. I would like nothing better than to be able to spend most of my time worshipping and reading my scriptures. I have duty towards and I love my husband, but the things that he is so engaged in don't grab my attention as they would have in the past. I don't want to leave this life without making some spiritual progress. The most positive thing I possess in this relationship is that I began it with being honest about my religious path, so that there were little surprises for him in that matter. But it is beginning to go deeper, so I wonder how to deal with this change. > > How fortunate you are, that you have been able to visit Devi Mandir. I would love to be able to go, but I must wait until I am a permanent resident in Canada or risk not being able to return. I am crossing my fingers for next summer. > > Jai Maa! Jai Swamiji! > > Kumari > --- On Sun, 7/19/09, weeshe83 <weeshe83 wrote: > > > weeshe83 <weeshe83 > [www.ShreeMaa.org] Issues with living in the world > > Sunday, July 19, 2009, 3:39 AM > > > > > > > Namaste everyone! > > Since I visited the Devi Mandir at the beginning of May, I have enjoyed tremendous progress on my spiritual journey. I am very grateful for this. However, I'm beginning to have problems with family members and friends who don't understand why or in what way I'm changing. Some see me as rejecting them or forgetting about them and don't understand vairagya in a positive light. How do I deal with THEIR emotional attachments to me as mine are falling away? > > Traditionally in India, people could leave and become sannyasis and never really deal with the familial ramifications of their egos melting. Many realized masters, at least for a time, separate themselves from their families or even leave them for good. I have a far way yet to full realization but that's my number one goal. For those of us who choose (wisely or otherwise) to stay in this society, how do we deal with the emotional needs of those who have relied on us in the past as we move beyond emotional attachments and vrttis? > > I'm sure many of you have had the same experiences I'm having. I'm less social and enjoy being at home with my books as much as possible. Some people don't encourage spiritual growth and so I'd rather not be around them too often while I'm trying to work on my sadhana and personal growth. I don't hate people, I just don't enjoy social situations as much as I enjoy the company of my self. How do you live in the world as your consciousness goes higher and higher and everything else just stays the same? > > I'd appreciate tapping in to the extensive reservoir of knowledge and experience this group has and compare notes. > > All my best, > Manya > (Michelle) > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 20, 2009 Report Share Posted July 20, 2009 Dear Manya/Michelle, I am touched by your questions, and your sharing of the spiritual journey you are on. I have similar questions myself, as I journey along. I think the answers must be different for everyone, depending on each soul's expression and reflection of Divinity. You are one facet of the Perfect Diamond Heart of Divine Mother, and thus maybe the only true answer can be found in continual prayer to Her: Divine Mother, please show me the way to love those with whom I am sharing this life. Please show me the most respectful way to grow in you and fulfill my commitments with others. For me personally, there is no separation between 'this world' or 'this society' and my spiritual world. The only God/Goddess/Divine Mother worth worshipping, for me, is the one who is 'all the omni's' - omnipresent, omniscient, omnipotent. Thus, She must be present in all people, even the ones with whom I have issues, maybe most especially those folks, because they reflect back to me the areas of my ego I can't see by myself, and help raise my awareness about them so I can lay them at Divine Mother's feet. I rely on the people She puts in front of me every day to help me GROW UP in Her Love! : ) Also, for me personally there is an important distinction between 'attachment' and 'relatedness'. Not all bonds between people are 'attachment' in my opinion. Attachment is grasping of the ego: it's when I love you only for what you can do for me, whether I realize it or not. I love you cuz you make me feel secure, or you improve my stature in life. But relatedness is Conscious Loving, which is allowing Divine Mother to be the author of how we connect with others, loving for the highest good of all people involved in the relationship. I love you because we are both expressions of Divine Mother. My experience is that there is this true love inherent in all relationships, and as I have grown closer to Her, the nature of my love for others has become more respectful and lighter, or freer. Some people like the feel of that and it helps them to grow too; others naturally fall away, towards what is best for them in their stage of the journey. I wish you joy in discovering what answers are right for you. No doubt Divine Mother will steer you in the right direction! Jennifer , " weeshe83 " <weeshe83 wrote: > > Namaste everyone! > > Since I visited the Devi Mandir at the beginning of May, I have enjoyed tremendous progress on my spiritual journey. I am very grateful for this. However, I'm beginning to have problems with family members and friends who don't understand why or in what way I'm changing. Some see me as rejecting them or forgetting about them and don't understand vairagya in a positive light. How do I deal with THEIR emotional attachments to me as mine are falling away? > > Traditionally in India, people could leave and become sannyasis and never really deal with the familial ramifications of their egos melting. Many realized masters, at least for a time, separate themselves from their families or even leave them for good. I have a far way yet to full realization but that's my number one goal. For those of us who choose (wisely or otherwise) to stay in this society, how do we deal with the emotional needs of those who have relied on us in the past as we move beyond emotional attachments and vrttis? > > I'm sure many of you have had the same experiences I'm having. I'm less social and enjoy being at home with my books as much as possible. Some people don't encourage spiritual growth and so I'd rather not be around them too often while I'm trying to work on my sadhana and personal growth. I don't hate people, I just don't enjoy social situations as much as I enjoy the company of my self. How do you live in the world as your consciousness goes higher and higher and everything else just stays the same? > > I'd appreciate tapping in to the extensive reservoir of knowledge and experience this group has and compare notes. > > All my best, > Manya > (Michelle) > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 21, 2009 Report Share Posted July 21, 2009 Blessings to you, dear Manya for bringing up this this interesting topic. I can only share what I experiece, but I hope it helps. How can we live/grow on a spiritual journey when our surroundings/families no longer seem condusive? It's all energy, pure and simple. As you truly, deeply progress on your spiritual journey, you raise your personal vibration (the energy that every atom of your existence and spirit spills out to the universe). The energies increasingly become more clear and more pure and more delightful, and most lower vibrating forms around you become almost repulsive to be around. People who you loved seem to give you " bad vibes " . Things you liked to do no longer seem fun or important. Issues that concerned you in the past no longer seem relevant. Most of life all becomes sort of silly. It doesn't make anyone wrong or bad or lessor (or greater for that matter) in God's eyes...it's just a matter of energies getting along with others. That's why you see children - especially those with special needs - so loving and pure to everyone, without bias or judgement. They love everyone and everything equally - until they come across something or someone that gives them bad vibes and makes them uncomfortable. They know to simply move away from the offensive energy, without attaching all the emotional baggage to it. This is what's happening with your family and friends. You are raising your vibrational energy and they are not. And it's making being around those energies very uncomfortable. Unless they choose to move along their own ascension (higher energies love to play!), it's going to get more and more abrasive as time goes on. Looking at it as simply changing energies, and not casting blame or judgement as to " right or wrong " lends a refreshing detachment to flowing through life. You get good vibes and you get bad vibes. And you stay to play or you simply move on. peace, sal. , " weeshe83 " <weeshe83 wrote: > > Namaste everyone! > > Since I visited the Devi Mandir at the beginning of May, I have enjoyed tremendous progress on my spiritual journey. I am very grateful for this. However, I'm beginning to have problems with family members and friends who don't understand why or in what way I'm changing. Some see me as rejecting them or forgetting about them and don't understand vairagya in a positive light. How do I deal with THEIR emotional attachments to me as mine are falling away? > > Traditionally in India, people could leave and become sannyasis and never really deal with the familial ramifications of their egos melting. Many realized masters, at least for a time, separate themselves from their families or even leave them for good. I have a far way yet to full realization but that's my number one goal. For those of us who choose (wisely or otherwise) to stay in this society, how do we deal with the emotional needs of those who have relied on us in the past as we move beyond emotional attachments and vrttis? > > I'm sure many of you have had the same experiences I'm having. I'm less social and enjoy being at home with my books as much as possible. Some people don't encourage spiritual growth and so I'd rather not be around them too often while I'm trying to work on my sadhana and personal growth. I don't hate people, I just don't enjoy social situations as much as I enjoy the company of my self. How do you live in the world as your consciousness goes higher and higher and everything else just stays the same? > > I'd appreciate tapping in to the extensive reservoir of knowledge and experience this group has and compare notes. > > All my best, > Manya > (Michelle) > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 23, 2009 Report Share Posted July 23, 2009 Dear Manya, Jaaaaaaaaaaaaai Maa! Just keep doing the sadhana and spreading the love to all you come in contact with......Maa takes care of the rest. Having come to the Mandir, you know that in your heart. She carries us forward when we have a clear intention. May divine Mother bless you with pure devotion!!!! , " sal. " <salpaulsen wrote: > > Blessings to you, dear Manya for bringing up this this interesting topic. I can only share what I experiece, but I hope it helps. > > How can we live/grow on a spiritual journey when our surroundings/families no longer seem condusive? > > It's all energy, pure and simple. As you truly, deeply progress on your spiritual journey, you raise your personal vibration (the energy that every atom of your existence and spirit spills out to the universe). The energies increasingly become more clear and more pure and more delightful, and most lower vibrating forms around you become almost repulsive to be around. People who you loved seem to give you " bad vibes " . Things you liked to do no longer seem fun or important. Issues that concerned you in the past no longer seem relevant. Most of life all becomes sort of silly. > > It doesn't make anyone wrong or bad or lessor (or greater for that matter) in God's eyes...it's just a matter of energies getting along with others. > > That's why you see children - especially those with special needs - so loving and pure to everyone, without bias or judgement. They love everyone and everything equally - until they come across something or someone that gives them bad vibes and makes them uncomfortable. They know to simply move away from the offensive energy, without attaching all the emotional baggage to it. > > This is what's happening with your family and friends. You are raising your vibrational energy and they are not. And it's making being around those energies very uncomfortable. Unless they choose to move along their own ascension (higher energies love to play!), it's going to get more and more abrasive as time goes on. > > Looking at it as simply changing energies, and not casting blame or judgement as to " right or wrong " lends a refreshing detachment to flowing through life. You get good vibes and you get bad vibes. And you stay to play or you simply move on. > > peace, > sal. > > > , " weeshe83 " <weeshe83@> wrote: > > > > Namaste everyone! > > > > Since I visited the Devi Mandir at the beginning of May, I have enjoyed tremendous progress on my spiritual journey. I am very grateful for this. However, I'm beginning to have problems with family members and friends who don't understand why or in what way I'm changing. Some see me as rejecting them or forgetting about them and don't understand vairagya in a positive light. How do I deal with THEIR emotional attachments to me as mine are falling away? > > > > Traditionally in India, people could leave and become sannyasis and never really deal with the familial ramifications of their egos melting. Many realized masters, at least for a time, separate themselves from their families or even leave them for good. I have a far way yet to full realization but that's my number one goal. For those of us who choose (wisely or otherwise) to stay in this society, how do we deal with the emotional needs of those who have relied on us in the past as we move beyond emotional attachments and vrttis? > > > > I'm sure many of you have had the same experiences I'm having. I'm less social and enjoy being at home with my books as much as possible. Some people don't encourage spiritual growth and so I'd rather not be around them too often while I'm trying to work on my sadhana and personal growth. I don't hate people, I just don't enjoy social situations as much as I enjoy the company of my self. How do you live in the world as your consciousness goes higher and higher and everything else just stays the same? > > > > I'd appreciate tapping in to the extensive reservoir of knowledge and experience this group has and compare notes. > > > > All my best, > > Manya > > (Michelle) > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 23, 2009 Report Share Posted July 23, 2009 , "weeshe83" <weeshe83 wrote:>> Namaste everyone!> > Since I visited the Devi Mandir at the beginning of May, I have enjoyed tremendous progress on my spiritual journey. I am very grateful for this. However, I'm beginning to have problems with family members and friends who don't understand why or in what way I'm changing. Some see me as rejecting them or forgetting about them and don't understand vairagya in a positive light. How do I deal with THEIR emotional attachments to me as mine are falling away?> >This is a very common experience. The family members do not mind when you take on religious practices, because it does not affect them. But when you start getting detached, every one has an objection. Attachment is the basis of the relationship with family and friends. It is the foundation on which Society is built.As you get more and more detached you will find even the spouse and children who do understand will not like it.I remember some saying about non-conformism " when you become a non-conformist you are breaking the rules of the Society which expects you to conform. So do not expect the society to accept your non-conformism." Traditionally in India, people could leave and become sannyasis and never really deal with the familial ramifications of their egos melting. Many realized masters, at least for a time, separate themselves from their families or even leave them for good. >>Sannyasa is not looked upon with favor by the Indian society. Especially the family members. In addition there are people who believe that a Sannyasi from a family brings hardship to the family.Being a sannyasi is not that easy. The choice is between joining an organization of Sannyasis (maths) or being an independent one. Joining any Math has its own problems. Organization means hierarchy. That means competition. I have seen Sannyasis competing for positions in the math. Being an independent wandering Monk is the best.<<I have a far way yet to full realization but that's my number one goal. For those of us who choose (wisely or otherwise) to stay in this society, how do we deal with the emotional needs of those who have relied on us in the past as we move beyond emotional attachments and vrttis?>>This is very difficult. Often we have to show an interest just to fulfill the needs of such people. > > I'm sure many of you have had the same experiences I'm having. I'm less social and enjoy being at home with my books as much as possible. Some people don't encourage spiritual growth and so I'd rather not be around them too often while I'm trying to work on my sadhana and personal growth. I don't hate people, I just don't enjoy social situations as much as I enjoy the company of my self. How do you live in the world as your consciousness goes higher and higher and everything else just stays the same? > Sri Ramakrishna often quoted the example of the Mud Fish. Mud Fish stays in the mud. But the mud does not stick to it.But it is easy to talk theory. What I have written is from my experience. But am I detached? I am not. Far from it. But I am taking baby steps holding the hands of MAA very firmly towards that goal.Jai MAA KAALI !!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 23, 2009 Report Share Posted July 23, 2009 I like what you have to say, Sankar. Here in the Western Hemisphere, we do not really have the choice of becoming a wandering sadhu. It is even less acceptable here, than in India. There is a possibility of joining an organization of monks, but as you say, there are issues with that as well. Where I am at right now, sometimes, I sink into worldliness or find myself rebelling against my spritual practices. I don't stay down as long or go so far down, though. Sometimes I find great joy in my practices and in keeping up a regular practice. So I have to, as you say, show interest in things that I don't really want to pursue that much anymore. This is difficult. I think it is a matter of my Ego. Just because I have progressed I don't want to have to deal with the things I was attached to before. Maybe I think I am better than the person who is still attached to some of them. This is a dangerous assumption. I am not neccesarily that person's spiritual superior. I have some deep rooted desires and attachments still. This is the situation I am in. I have to work that karma out until it is finished. I have to sever the extreme attachment I have towards people and things so that the peace of my mind is not disturbed and I can focus upon Maa. So what I want to do now is have detached love for my activities and people in my life. I think that is the key. They are not the all-important thing in my life, Maa is! This is not a simple or easy thing for me to do. I am an emotional and sensitive person and sending my asuras to heaven takes time and discipline. That is why I am so grateful for having found Devi Mandir. Shree Maa and Swamiji teach me the path for me to get out of this jungle of desires and emotions I have lived in for so long and come out into the light of the Gods. All I wanted to do was to learn how to do puja, but here I have found so much more! Immediately I recognized that this was the way for me. This is the path that appeals to my soul, that points me in the direction of my dharma. Jai Shree Maa! Jai Swamiji! Kumari --- On Thu, 7/23/09, Sankar Viswanathan <sankarrukku wrote: Sankar Viswanathan <sankarrukku[www.ShreeMaa.org] Re: Issues with living in the world Date: Thursday, July 23, 2009, 12:21 AM , "weeshe83" <weeshe83 wrote:>> Namaste everyone!> > Since I visited the Devi Mandir at the beginning of May, I have enjoyed tremendous progress on my spiritual journey. I am very grateful for this. However, I'm beginning to have problems with family members and friends who don't understand why or in what way I'm changing. Some see me as rejecting them or forgetting about them and don't understand vairagya in a positive light. How do I deal with THEIR emotional attachments to me as mine are falling away?> >This is a very common experience. The family members do not mind when you take on religious practices, because it does not affect them. But when you start getting detached, every one has an objection. Attachment is the basis of the relationship with family and friends. It is the foundation on which Society is built.As you get more and more detached you will find even the spouse and children who do understand will not like it.I remember some saying about non-conformism " when you become a non-conformist you are breaking the rules of the Society which expects you to conform. So do not expect the society to accept your non-conformism. " Traditionally in India, people could leave and become sannyasis and never really deal with the familial ramifications of their egos melting. Many realized masters, at least for a time, separate themselves from their families or even leave them for good. >>Sannyasa is not looked upon with favor by the Indian society. Especially the family members. In addition there are people who believe that a Sannyasi from a family brings hardship to the family.Being a sannyasi is not that easy. The choice is between joining an organization of Sannyasis (maths) or being an independent one. Joining any Math has its own problems. Organization means hierarchy. That means competition. I have seen Sannyasis competing for positions in the math. Being an independent wandering Monk is the best.<<I have a far way yet to full realization but that's my number one goal. For those of us who choose (wisely or otherwise) to stay in this society, how do we deal with the emotional needs of those who have relied on us in the past as we move beyond emotional attachments and vrttis?>>This is very difficult. Often we have to show an interest just to fulfill the needs of such people. > > I'm sure many of you have had the same experiences I'm having. I'm less social and enjoy being at home with my books as much as possible. Some people don't encourage spiritual growth and so I'd rather not be around them too often while I'm trying to work on my sadhana and personal growth. I don't hate people, I just don't enjoy social situations as much as I enjoy the company of my self. How do you live in the world as your consciousness goes higher and higher and everything else just stays the same? > Sri Ramakrishna often quoted the example of the Mud Fish. Mud Fish stays in the mud. But the mud does not stick to it.But it is easy to talk theory. What I have written is from my experience. But am I detached? I am not. Far from it. But I am taking baby steps holding the hands of MAA very firmly towards that goal.Jai MAA KAALI !!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 25, 2009 Report Share Posted July 25, 2009 Namasaram ladies - Manyaji I used to live in Regina, but now live in Winipeg. Some things that help me to do worldly duties while keeping up my spiritual life include: Getting up in brahma mahurtham - 4 - 5:30 so that nobody is availalbe to require me! Using jpa during all wordly duties Sitting in parties in a corner - happily chanting in my head answering people and talking to them when they come to me Communication - you can explain to very close people that you are on a journey within right now andthat is why you like to be alone - tell your close people that you love them a lot and that you are not trying to ignore them but you are just on a quest right now - those who love you may not totally understand, but they will surely respect you. Slowly, when people getused tonot seeing you around as much they will stop expecting it and your life will shift so that you have alone time - it is atransition that is all. Our spiritual progress is largely a personal journey and weare cultured to be social beings so we are just shifting into a different way of being in this world and like any new thing transition period is there for a while and then the old becomes the new and becomes the way of being. From: weeshe83Date: Mon, 20 Jul 2009 02:18:14 +0000[www.ShreeMaa.org] Re: Issues with living in the world I didn't know you were a fellow Canadian, Kumari! Whereabouts are you calling home? I'm in Regina. It's a pity that bureaucratics are delaying what will be an amazing trip for you. But it will mean even more to you when you do get to go. I'm lucky to have a boyfriend who also understands my spiritual journey. He's very supportive and encouraging. I've always been extremely close with my family but it's becoming difficult lately. Although most of them are at least open to some new age kind of thinking, they're still very much attached to their egos and, in some cases, to mine. I know it's important to be compassionate and loving to the people in our lives but not at the expense of my personal growth. I think it's easier for people of Swamiji's or Shree Maa's caliber to not be affected by others as much. But I'm certainly no where near their level. I can definitely say I did not expect this when I started on this journey over 7 years ago.~Manya(Michelle) , Joan Fisher <mjfisher2005 wrote:>> I think this is a very excellent question. It is something I will have to deal with as time goes by and in other contexts besides the spiritual it has happened to me in the past when my interests begin to diverge from the ones I held in common with important people in my past.> I don't have an answer, but I really need one, since I can see the beginnings of the change of attitudes and change of habits within me that you are talking about, Michelle. I would like nothing better than to be able to spend most of my time worshipping and reading my scriptures. I have duty towards and I love my husband, but the things that he is so engaged in don't grab my attention as they would have in the past. I don't want to leave this life without making some spiritual progress. The most positive thing I possess in this relationship is that I began it with being honest about my religious path, so that there were little surprises for him in that matter. But it is beginning to go deeper, so I wonder how to deal with this change.> > How fortunate you are, that you have been able to visit Devi Mandir. I would love to be able to go, but I must wait until I am a permanent resident in Canada or risk not being able to return. I am crossing my fingers for next summer.> > Jai Maa! Jai Swamiji!> > Kumari> --- On Sun, 7/19/09, weeshe83 <weeshe83 wrote:> > > weeshe83 <weeshe83> [www.ShreeMaa.org] Issues with living in the world> > Sunday, July 19, 2009, 3:39 AM> > > > > > > Namaste everyone!> > Since I visited the Devi Mandir at the beginning of May, I have enjoyed tremendous progress on my spiritual journey. I am very grateful for this. However, I'm beginning to have problems with family members and friends who don't understand why or in what way I'm changing. Some see me as rejecting them or forgetting about them and don't understand vairagya in a positive light. How do I deal with THEIR emotional attachments to me as mine are falling away?> > Traditionally in India, people could leave and become sannyasis and never really deal with the familial ramifications of their egos melting. Many realized masters, at least for a time, separate themselves from their families or even leave them for good. I have a far way yet to full realization but that's my number one goal. For those of us who choose (wisely or otherwise) to stay in this society, how do we deal with the emotional needs of those who have relied on us in the past as we move beyond emotional attachments and vrttis?> > I'm sure many of you have had the same experiences I'm having. I'm less social and enjoy being at home with my books as much as possible. Some people don't encourage spiritual growth and so I'd rather not be around them too often while I'm trying to work on my sadhana and personal growth. I don't hate people, I just don't enjoy social situations as much as I enjoy the company of my self. How do you live in the world as your consciousness goes higher and higher and everything else just stays the same? > > I'd appreciate tapping in to the extensive reservoir of knowledge and experience this group has and compare notes. > > All my best,> Manya> (Michelle)> More storage. Better anti-spam and antivirus protection. Hotmail makes it simple. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 25, 2009 Report Share Posted July 25, 2009 Sorry I didn't answer this before, Michelle. I am in Kitchener. I have been living here since March, when I got married. Too bad you are out in BC, it would be nice to have another devotee to talk with here. Feel free to get in touch with me. Let me know if you ever make a trip to Ontario. I would love to know more about your trip to Devi Mandir. Jai Maa! Jai Swamiji! Kumari , " weeshe83 " <weeshe83 wrote: > > I didn't know you were a fellow Canadian, Kumari! Whereabouts are you calling home? I'm in Regina. It's a pity that bureaucratics are delaying what will be an amazing trip for you. But it will mean even more to you when you do get to go. > > I'm lucky to have a boyfriend who also understands my spiritual journey. He's very supportive and encouraging. I've always been extremely close with my family but it's becoming difficult lately. Although most of them are at least open to some new age kind of thinking, they're still very much attached to their egos and, in some cases, to mine. I know it's important to be compassionate and loving to the people in our lives but not at the expense of my personal growth. I think it's easier for people of Swamiji's or Shree Maa's caliber to not be affected by others as much. But I'm certainly no where near their level. I can definitely say I did not expect this when I started on this journey over 7 years ago. > > ~Manya > (Michelle) > > > , Joan Fisher <mjfisher2005@> wrote: > > > > I think this is a very excellent question. It is something I will have to deal with as time goes by and in other contexts besides the spiritual it has happened to me in the past when my interests begin to diverge from the ones I held in common with important people in my past. > > I don't have an answer, but I really need one, since I can see the beginnings of the change of attitudes and change of habits within me that you are talking about, Michelle. I would like nothing better than to be able to spend most of my time worshipping and reading my scriptures. I have duty towards and I love my husband, but the things that he is so engaged in don't grab my attention as they would have in the past. I don't want to leave this life without making some spiritual progress. The most positive thing I possess in this relationship is that I began it with being honest about my religious path, so that there were little surprises for him in that matter. But it is beginning to go deeper, so I wonder how to deal with this change. > > > > How fortunate you are, that you have been able to visit Devi Mandir. I would love to be able to go, but I must wait until I am a permanent resident in Canada or risk not being able to return. I am crossing my fingers for next summer. > > > > Jai Maa! Jai Swamiji! > > > > Kumari > > --- On Sun, 7/19/09, weeshe83 <weeshe83@> wrote: > > > > > > weeshe83 <weeshe83@> > > [www.ShreeMaa.org] Issues with living in the world > > > > Sunday, July 19, 2009, 3:39 AM > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Namaste everyone! > > > > Since I visited the Devi Mandir at the beginning of May, I have enjoyed tremendous progress on my spiritual journey. I am very grateful for this. However, I'm beginning to have problems with family members and friends who don't understand why or in what way I'm changing. Some see me as rejecting them or forgetting about them and don't understand vairagya in a positive light. How do I deal with THEIR emotional attachments to me as mine are falling away? > > > > Traditionally in India, people could leave and become sannyasis and never really deal with the familial ramifications of their egos melting. Many realized masters, at least for a time, separate themselves from their families or even leave them for good. I have a far way yet to full realization but that's my number one goal. For those of us who choose (wisely or otherwise) to stay in this society, how do we deal with the emotional needs of those who have relied on us in the past as we move beyond emotional attachments and vrttis? > > > > I'm sure many of you have had the same experiences I'm having. I'm less social and enjoy being at home with my books as much as possible. Some people don't encourage spiritual growth and so I'd rather not be around them too often while I'm trying to work on my sadhana and personal growth. I don't hate people, I just don't enjoy social situations as much as I enjoy the company of my self. How do you live in the world as your consciousness goes higher and higher and everything else just stays the same? > > > > I'd appreciate tapping in to the extensive reservoir of knowledge and experience this group has and compare notes. > > > > All my best, > > Manya > > (Michelle) > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 25, 2009 Report Share Posted July 25, 2009 Namaste Venkat Thank you for your wisdom. There are many good hints there. I think the main thing is not to get frustrated and angry, just because you have seen a path that others in your life do not get and to treat them generously and kindly. One of Maa's attributes is patient forgiveness. I need all of this quality that I can get Jai Maa! Jai Swamiji! Kumari , Venkat Machiraju <venkatmachiraju65 wrote: > > > Namasaram ladies - Manyaji I used to live in Regina, but now live in Winipeg. > > > > Some things that help me to do worldly duties while keeping up my spiritual life include: > > Getting up in brahma mahurtham - 4 - 5:30 so that nobody is availalbe to require me! > > Using jpa during all wordly duties > > Sitting in parties in a corner - happily chanting in my head answering people and talking to them when they come to me > > Communication - you can explain to very close people that you are on a journey within right now andthat is why you like to be alone - tell your close people that you love them a lot and that you are not trying to ignore them but you are just on a quest right now - those who love you may not totally understand, but they will surely respect you. > > Slowly, when people getused tonot seeing you around as much they will stop expecting it and your life will shift so that you have alone time - it is atransition that is all. > > Our spiritual progress is largely a personal journey and weare cultured to be social beings so we are just shifting into a different way of being in this world and like any new thing transition period is there for a while and then the old becomes the new and becomes the way of being. > > > > > weeshe83 > Mon, 20 Jul 2009 02:18:14 +0000 > [www.ShreeMaa.org] Re: Issues with living in the world > > > > > > I didn't know you were a fellow Canadian, Kumari! Whereabouts are you calling home? I'm in Regina. It's a pity that bureaucratics are delaying what will be an amazing trip for you. But it will mean even more to you when you do get to go. > > I'm lucky to have a boyfriend who also understands my spiritual journey. He's very supportive and encouraging. I've always been extremely close with my family but it's becoming difficult lately. Although most of them are at least open to some new age kind of thinking, they're still very much attached to their egos and, in some cases, to mine. I know it's important to be compassionate and loving to the people in our lives but not at the expense of my personal growth. I think it's easier for people of Swamiji's or Shree Maa's caliber to not be affected by others as much. But I'm certainly no where near their level. I can definitely say I did not expect this when I started on this journey over 7 years ago. > > ~Manya > (Michelle) > > , Joan Fisher <mjfisher2005@> wrote: > > > > I think this is a very excellent question. It is something I will have to deal with as time goes by and in other contexts besides the spiritual it has happened to me in the past when my interests begin to diverge from the ones I held in common with important people in my past. > > I don't have an answer, but I really need one, since I can see the beginnings of the change of attitudes and change of habits within me that you are talking about, Michelle. I would like nothing better than to be able to spend most of my time worshipping and reading my scriptures. I have duty towards and I love my husband, but the things that he is so engaged in don't grab my attention as they would have in the past. I don't want to leave this life without making some spiritual progress. The most positive thing I possess in this relationship is that I began it with being honest about my religious path, so that there were little surprises for him in that matter. But it is beginning to go deeper, so I wonder how to deal with this change. > > > > How fortunate you are, that you have been able to visit Devi Mandir. I would love to be able to go, but I must wait until I am a permanent resident in Canada or risk not being able to return. I am crossing my fingers for next summer. > > > > Jai Maa! Jai Swamiji! > > > > Kumari > > --- On Sun, 7/19/09, weeshe83 <weeshe83@> wrote: > > > > > > weeshe83 <weeshe83@> > > [www.ShreeMaa.org] Issues with living in the world > > > > Sunday, July 19, 2009, 3:39 AM > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Namaste everyone! > > > > Since I visited the Devi Mandir at the beginning of May, I have enjoyed tremendous progress on my spiritual journey. I am very grateful for this. However, I'm beginning to have problems with family members and friends who don't understand why or in what way I'm changing. Some see me as rejecting them or forgetting about them and don't understand vairagya in a positive light. How do I deal with THEIR emotional attachments to me as mine are falling away? > > > > Traditionally in India, people could leave and become sannyasis and never really deal with the familial ramifications of their egos melting. Many realized masters, at least for a time, separate themselves from their families or even leave them for good. I have a far way yet to full realization but that's my number one goal. For those of us who choose (wisely or otherwise) to stay in this society, how do we deal with the emotional needs of those who have relied on us in the past as we move beyond emotional attachments and vrttis? > > > > I'm sure many of you have had the same experiences I'm having. I'm less social and enjoy being at home with my books as much as possible. Some people don't encourage spiritual growth and so I'd rather not be around them too often while I'm trying to work on my sadhana and personal growth. I don't hate people, I just don't enjoy social situations as much as I enjoy the company of my self. How do you live in the world as your consciousness goes higher and higher and everything else just stays the same? > > > > I'd appreciate tapping in to the extensive reservoir of knowledge and experience this group has and compare notes. > > > > All my best, > > Manya > > (Michelle) > > > > > _______________ > More storage. Better anti-spam and antivirus protection. Hotmail makes it simple. > http://go.microsoft.com/?linkid=9671357 > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 27, 2009 Report Share Posted July 27, 2009 The attachment of the loved ones are the most difficult to deal with. You may not be attached anymore, but they still remain attached to you. Love is the basic emotion here. Just because you are not attached to someone now, does not mean that you stop loving them. People do believe that this is so. What worries them is the persumed loss of your love.But the purest love is Love without attachment. Love without expectations. Love without jealousy. Have we not seen this Love? Sree Maa and Swamiji give us all their Love without any attachment or expectations. Once the Loved ones know that you still love them, their concerns will disappear. Of course this does come gradually. But it is a goal to be achieved. Later on we make this Love Universal. Love for all living things.The problem with social interaction is one which is faced by all spiritual seekers. Sannyasa is the best way out. But when you are not ready for that and have to earn a living, it becomes extremely difficult. You count the days when you can run away from the society. You choose a job where there is very little inter-action with people.Later you leave your job and go to a place where you are not known socially and live like a recluse. Nobody knows you and you are spared the pain of social inter-action.This is a long term solution.Jai MAA !!! , "weeshe83" <weeshe83 wrote:>> Namaste everyone!> > Since I visited the Devi Mandir at the beginning of May, I have enjoyed tremendous progress on my spiritual journey. I am very grateful for this. However, I'm beginning to have problems with family members and friends who don't understand why or in what way I'm changing. Some see me as rejecting them or forgetting about them and don't understand vairagya in a positive light. How do I deal with THEIR emotional attachments to me as mine are falling away?> > Traditionally in India, people could leave and become sannyasis and never really deal with the familial ramifications of their egos melting. Many realized masters, at least for a time, separate themselves from their families or even leave them for good. I have a far way yet to full realization but that's my number one goal. For those of us who choose (wisely or otherwise) to stay in this society, how do we deal with the emotional needs of those who have relied on us in the past as we move beyond emotional attachments and vrttis?> > I'm sure many of you have had the same experiences I'm having. I'm less social and enjoy being at home with my books as much as possible. Some people don't encourage spiritual growth and so I'd rather not be around them too often while I'm trying to work on my sadhana and personal growth. I don't hate people, I just don't enjoy social situations as much as I enjoy the company of my self. How do you live in the world as your consciousness goes higher and higher and everything else just stays the same? > > I'd appreciate tapping in to the extensive reservoir of knowledge and experience this group has and compare notes. > > All my best,> Manya> (Michelle)> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 27, 2009 Report Share Posted July 27, 2009 Namaste! Some thoughts on family issues: 1. Swamiji says, every one who treads the spiritual path faces opposition from the birth family. No one is spared this challenge. This is an ancient age-old problem. Buddha, Adi Shankaracharya, Suka, Mirabai, ... So we have plenty of famous company to get inspiration from. 2. Continually pray for peace and harmony in the family. Define your dharma or duties toward them and discharge them with as much love as you are capable of. And please do not use the " R " word in your conversations. R = Renunciation. 3. Avadhootas cannot be found because they do not want to be found. Even sadhus have families, actually every Sadhu has a family. We try to learn the spirit of renunciation from them as best we can. 4. Swamiji says, offer all your afflictions and attachments to God when you do your worship. For God to accept them you have to perform your worship with complete attention and sincerity. 5. Do sadhana regularly to the best of your capacity. By sadhana alone our attachments become weaker. How long that will take, God will decide. Love srini , " Sankar Viswanathan " <sankarrukku wrote: > > The attachment of the loved ones are the most difficult to deal with. > You may not be attached anymore, but they still remain attached to you. > Love is the basic emotion here. Just because you are not attached to > someone now, does not mean that you stop loving them. People do believe > that this is so. What worries them is the persumed loss of your love. > > But the purest love is Love without attachment. Love without > expectations. Love without jealousy. Have we not seen this Love? Sree > Maa and Swamiji give us all their Love without any attachment or > expectations. Once the Loved ones know that you still love them, their > concerns will disappear. Of course this does come gradually. But it is a > goal to be achieved. Later on we make this Love Universal. Love for all > living things. > > The problem with social interaction is one which is faced by all > spiritual seekers. Sannyasa is the best way out. But when you are not > ready for that and have to earn a living, it becomes extremely > difficult. You count the days when you can run away from the society. > You choose a job where there is very little inter-action with people. > > Later you leave your job and go to a place where you are not known > socially and live like a recluse. Nobody knows you and you are spared > the pain of social inter-action. > > This is a long term solution. > > Jai MAA !!! > > > > > > , " weeshe83 " <weeshe83@> wrote: > > > > Namaste everyone! > > > > Since I visited the Devi Mandir at the beginning of May, I have > enjoyed tremendous progress on my spiritual journey. I am very grateful > for this. However, I'm beginning to have problems with family members > and friends who don't understand why or in what way I'm changing. Some > see me as rejecting them or forgetting about them and don't understand > vairagya in a positive light. How do I deal with THEIR emotional > attachments to me as mine are falling away? > > > > Traditionally in India, people could leave and become sannyasis and > never really deal with the familial ramifications of their egos melting. > Many realized masters, at least for a time, separate themselves from > their families or even leave them for good. I have a far way yet to > full realization but that's my number one goal. For those of us who > choose (wisely or otherwise) to stay in this society, how do we deal > with the emotional needs of those who have relied on us in the past as > we move beyond emotional attachments and vrttis? > > > > I'm sure many of you have had the same experiences I'm having. I'm > less social and enjoy being at home with my books as much as possible. > Some people don't encourage spiritual growth and so I'd rather not be > around them too often while I'm trying to work on my sadhana and > personal growth. I don't hate people, I just don't enjoy social > situations as much as I enjoy the company of my self. How do you live > in the world as your consciousness goes higher and higher and everything > else just stays the same? > > > > I'd appreciate tapping in to the extensive reservoir of knowledge and > experience this group has and compare notes. > > > > All my best, > > Manya > > (Michelle) > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 30, 2009 Report Share Posted July 30, 2009 1. Swamiji says, every one who treads the spiritual path faces opposition from the birth family. No one is spared this challenge. This is an ancient age-old problem. Buddha, Adi Shankaracharya, Suka, Mirabai, ... So we have plenty of famous company to get inspiration from. When I was younger I wanted to enter a convent, and my family prevented me from doing so. Needless to say that my birth family has given me fits for all of my 46 years. It is often disheartening. These words from Swamiji give me comfort. I guess it's pretty difficult for them to understand me when I don't share the values they share or I don't value the rat race like they do. As for my husband and I, I consider him to be like Shiva. My children and my husband are my teachers in this life. Shanti Om, Starla Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.