COL for all

[Guest guest]

Remember being a child. Your mom and dad take you to the store to buy a really

special toy that you have been wanting? I remember getting a toy on occasion but

they were far and in-between because my parents were a low income family, so

when we actually were able to have a toy, it was a great joy. Try closing your

eyes for a few minutes and remember getting a toy or something very special. Try

it. I remember playing with my toy for hours, the 'newness' of it, it was so

unbelievable that I was able to have a toy at all. It would be bed time and when

waking the next morning I thought it was nothing but a dream, it was too

unbelievable. Until.....looking down to see my special toy still sitting

there... I would become joyous all over again.... This is what Amma is like for

me... she is too unbelievable to be true and when waking every morning I am

overcome with awe in my heart. She is so magically unbelievable its hard to

believe that she is real at all. I just become

dumbfounded. I was so blind in my life until she came to awakened me. She is so

special and we are all so lucky.

 

Lately, Any bad thoughts that rise up within me I tell myself quickly " I am

not these thoughts " over and over. Any good thoughts that come up, the 'I' tries

to take credit, I tell myself " These thoughts belong to Amma, there is no 'I'

here, there is only Amma. " If a situation is happening I don't like...I try to

immediately become a witness to thoughts and actions and let it go, surrendering

to the outcome. I try to take the 'I' away, the 'selfish' feeling and tell

myself the next time my body and mind are tired, " You are not the body, the body

is here to serve others, not the self. " These things can become overwhelming to

me often, but then I hear Amma whisper, " One step at a time, your effort is

good. Don't become overwhelmed, take it slow and do what you can when you can. "

When I feel myself letting go, surrendering, I feel the humility within rise up,

then Amma comes and nothing else matters in that moment, only Amma. Keep shining

on and remember that within each of

us is our own Amma.

 

 

Oh sweet divine Mother,

What can I do but surrender in your ocean?

You play with me tossing me about.

Your words are like the rain,

showering on my head,

But I want to drown in the ocean of you.

Surely I will burn up from the hot sun.

When will you swallow me up?

I surrender to you mother,

Take me under.. into the abyss of you.